Yesterday night was rather interesting.. one of my x-girlfriends slept over at my house. Naturally one would think that we had sex, but that was not the case. (((The back-story to this girl: we dated freshman year of high school for a month, then broke up and proceeded to hook up all throughout high school. In my junior year she obtained a new bf who happened to be the captain of the wrestling team.. no joke he was comparable to a grizzly bear. Initially I respected her decision and kept my distance from her. Eh about half way through the year I foolishly allowed my little head get the best of me thus I decided to send her and "innocent" text message. Needless to say I hooked up with her about a month later.. She went down on me. It was awesome. When I drove her back home we discussed how our hooking up was simply a vacation from her relationship, and how she should never tell her "bear like" boyfriend. As time progressed she became consumed by guilt and began to hate me.))) We didn’t talk for around two years.. and then I saw her on black friday and used an indirect opener. she was unresponsive and gave me the dagger eyes About a week later I saw her at a friends party and decided fuck it, if i get a drink poured in my face then at least it'll make for a good story. Luckily I knew one her friends and opened the 4 set with ease. After about two minutes of rapport with the group I stared at her (the infamous cajun stare ) and proceeded to teasingly ask her why we weren't friends anymore. To which she responded "its a two way street" I gazed at her intently, as if to fully soak up the statement (in actuality I was pretty drunk and didn’t fully understand what she said haha) I then saw and old friend and senselessly ejected from the set to say hi. I saw her again that night used a situational open (i dont remember what I said ha it was probably stupid and slurred) and then momentarily isolated by bringing her to a "quieter area of the room" though our conversation was brief, I established that we were going to hangout before xmas break ended. So we kept in touch over facebook chat/ texting and I ended up picking her up on xmas day at around 12:00 pm and brought her to once of my good friends kickbacks. While there we smoked at the time I was hoping that getting her high would make her more horny, ha I guess not. I then took back to my place.. The story should get good now.. right? nope. She was incredibly sassy and sarcastic as we drove. Once we arrived I took her to my room (random question, should I have lit a candle to set some sort of mood when I first walked in the room?) We began to talk about random stuff; freshman year in college, the new out of state friends she made in college, bla bla bla. While we were talking I asked her about some of the guys she had hooked up with in college, to my surprise she hadn’t so much as even kissed another guy. She got this dazed look over her face and proceeded to tell me how no one else even compared to her x-bf (both her and her bf broke up before they left for college). I didn’t pay much attention to her bf comments and brought up another subject. Then she randomly said she was cold and grabbed a blanket. Me being an inexperienced PUA saw that as a potential opportunity to kino her by having a battle over one of my blankets. Ha I guess it kind of worked, there was quite a bit of friction as we tugged for supremacy. Eventually I let her win and we began to talk again for what seemed like two or three hours. By that time I was pretty tired and decided to get ready for bed. She took the hint and asked to borrow a pair of my sweatpants (wearing my clothing= ioi??) As I was getting into be she grabbed my favorite blanket and bundled her self up in it. So I teased her for a bit saying how I was going to take it from her. A minute later I decided to pull another one out of my closet and hopped into bed. (by this point I was convinced that I was not going to hookup with her and turned the light off) Every time I began to pass out she would initiate a conversation (ioi?) to which I would lackadaisically respond. At one point she asked me what my expectations for the night were, I responded saying that we had always had a thing for eachother and passed out. The next morning we made plans to go hiking in a weeks time.


Please tell me what I did right wrong.. any suggestions would be highly appreciated!

-demo[/b][/u]

I would have loved some paragraphs. But here's what I've got for you.

It had the symptoms of AFC. Taking her to smoke, wrestling over a blanket. I would have done all that a year ago and gotten nowhere with it. Her sarcasm was also probably not that, or at least no initially. You probably took something the wrong way, or misinterpreted her signals and bad vibes were had by all.

But enough with that. You probably could have had sex with her. No problem that you didn't, but you probably could have. It sounds like at the party, especially when you opened the set smoothly, you confirmed that you were still worthy of consideration. She probably decided by the time she left that party that she was probably going to sleep with you.

MOST IMPORTANT THING TO TAKE AWAY FROM THIS. Remember that she is wondering what you think of her. She considers what you think of her more than what she thinks of you. This is the aspect we rarely consider. She isn't thinking "He missed his chance with me that night," she's thinking "what was he up to that night? Does he like me or not?"

This is hugely in your favor. Stay KIND, confident and sexual. It'll work out.

Thanks slip.

Random question, if I bring a girl into my room (preferably later in the night) is it wise to light a candle?

I noticed that question. I usually try to answer specific questions in my posts. The reason I didn't is that I don't think lighting a candle matters at all, it's neither necessary nor unnecessary. It could state your intentions as being sexual, but don't light a candle then say you want to go straight to bed. A candle would go well with some pillow talk, middle school truth or dare type games.

I'd be worried about the candle... Is girl is insecure... She doesn't necessarily want to have sex with you, she just wants to reassure herself that somebody still is into her... A candle gives her that confirmation... Some of yr responses may have given her that too... As long as she gets that, she has no interest in more... I would totally neg her and bring her down... She talked about her ex, 'what a tool, that the guy that usually take u to taco bell on the first date' 'does construction' amog...

When she's cold, I would have jumped in bed and like shared the blanket... 'I think I'm cold too' then just reminisce about good memories... Fun u two had together, but non sexual...'remember that dog in our neighborhood' at some point smell her hair and start doing push pull... Ur hair smells nice - are u using a guys shampoo? U know I miss our fun times and kiss her on the forehead (again - build tension while she's gonna struggle to figure out if u are into her or just a good old friend). Next, start moving and positioning under the blanket for more... My favorite move... Spoon in a friendly manner... And then kinda roll ur hand down over her belly then breast while leaning in to smell her hair and kiss her neck... Slowly move along the neck laterally until she turns her head and kiss her... The rest is history...