I've been working with the DVH's for day sarging.

somethign along the lines of talikng to target and getting to ask you how your day was.

Me: well... currently its a 6.5 and rising. i didn't get time for lunch.
her: really? why?
me: got harrassed by a clown...
her: wtf?
me: yeah... *pause, wait for her to ask again*
her: well!?!
me: well you see, i was walking through westfields (or whatever mall you guys have) and i came across a crying child. It always makes me feel really shit when i see crying kids cos i think back to when i got lost as a child. so I get down and try comforting the girl and ask her is she lost and what not, but she doesn't respond and starts to cry more! when i tell her that i'll take her to help her find her mummy thats when she cracks it and all hell break loose! So by now i'm kind've thinking... wtf have i got myself into, i just wanted a foccacia... and now i looks like i'm a god damn pedo. so i look around and i see some balloons, i run over and untie one and come back to girl cos i don't want to lose sight of her. after i tie it around her wrist i get a tap on my shoulder and its her mum. anyway after a bit of talk i leave and i'm now running cos i'm late for work, suddenly i pulled aside by security and a clown is in my face telling me i've stolen a balloon!

i dunno if this will really work... i'm yet to field test this one... my friend said he thought i was telling a real story so i dunno...

but it does show a few things about you.

1. you work.
2. you care about other ppl, in this case a lost child.
3. you think quick on your feet.

i thought of a nother one which involves an old granny telling me that i'm meant to be a marine biologist... but i'll save that one for later.

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If you're important, people will wait.

Thanks a lot for help with my story! I'll try this out over this weekend and give you the results of your changes.

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"What can I say? Can't help that I'm attracted to geeky women...they have some kind of passion about them that is attractive." - Me.

So this is something that kinda happened to me today, i thought it was pretty funny, and reckon it would make an alright dhv. Plus it contains nudity...

OMG.. I did the dumbest thing when i was getting ready to go out tonight.. See I share a house with this guy, but he's been away for like six months. He just moved back in (he lives upstairs, I live downstairs), and Im still not used to sharing a house again.
So I'm getting ready to go out, and I've just jumped out the shower and got back to my room, when I realise that all my clean underwear is drying in the laundry room at the back of the house. So without thinking, I strut outta my room (buck naked), and wander through the house. Suddenly I hear his bedroom door open, and panic! praying that my underwear is dry, I rush through to the laundry room and pull on the first pair of boxers I find. Then, what option do I have? I stride back through the house, right past him in my undies, all 'Hi Ian!' (he's like 'Uuuh... hi...'), back to my room!

the truth: I did walk throught the house naked without thinking - fortunately Ian didnt come out of his room, I just happened to think 'What if...?'.

Field tested this one a couple times tonight. first on my mates (2 girls, 1 guy). They pissed themselves, so i figure its a good story. Second time on two girls i opened at the club. didnt go amazingly, but I'm just starting out, and my game isn't up to much yet really.

So what dyou reckon? my feelings are, it's funny and shows I am pretty comfortable in my own body, but doesn't really have any dhv spikes, and maybe shows too much vulnerabilty. any and all comments welcomed.

-SatNav

Hey so I know this story is WAY too long but one of my main problems is figuring out how to shorten it. I know this has incredible potential. Thanks for your help Ka.

(If it seems like Mike didn’t talk much during this story its because he didn’t. He is one of the most beta dudes ever.)

So, my friend Mike and I got dropped off by the taxi we took a couple hundred meters from the Rajadamnern Stadium. It’s one of the two biggest Muay Thai stadiums in all of Thailand. We started to walk towards the stadium and were almost immediately approached by a boy in a red jacket that said “Muay Thai” on it. He handed us programs for the fights that night and started to talk to us. At this point I ignored him because in Thailand you are approached like this by people trying to scam you every couple of minutes.

When he noticed that we were ignoring him he told us he was not trying to scam us and we should only buy our tickets from the counter. At this point we figured he was legitimate since we already knew the only safe place to buy tickets was at the counter. When we got to the stadium and headed for the counter to buy our tickets he got aggressive and directed us straight through the entrance. He put stickers on us that said “Muay Thai” and had a picture of two fighters on them. Then he walked us by the people checking tickets and sat us down in ringside seats like we wanted.

At this point, he asked us if we were going to pay the 2,000 baht by cash or credit card. When I said credit card he told me there would be a surcharge for using it. When I said that was fine he walked away. When he came back he said if we paid cash he would only charge us 1,900 baht. Now I knew something was wrong for sure. At no point had I ever seen tickets. If I handed this guy 1,900 in cash I could see tickets being checked when the fight started at 6:30 (it was 6:15) and I would have nothing but a story to tell the people.

So I grabbed my friend Mike and headed back out for the ticket counter. Now the kid got extremely angry. He was yelling at us in broken English asking why we were making such trouble for him. I explained to him that people try to scam us on a regular basis and I wasn’t going to risk it. He was furious and pointed to the lanyard around his neck that said VIP on it and explained how this was his job. I just repeated the same thing a couple of times and got nowhere with him. At this point Mike tried to explain it as well while I walked up to the ticket counter.

As I was trying to purchase the tickets the boy walked up and spoke to the lady behind the counter in Thai. Then a woman wearing a suit who was clearly in charge walked over and pushed the boy away from me while talking to him in Thai. She told me it was up to me whether I wanted to buy the tickets from the counter or him. So I bought the tickets from the counter and Mike and I took our seats front row center.

After the second fight was over, the woman who had helped us, Sarah, sat down behind us and apologized for the boys behavior. She said her family has been working at the stadium for three generations and they are trying to make it a better place. She told us how this kid gets complaints against him on almost a daily basis and she wants to have him fired. In order to do so though she needed us to talk to her boss. She asked if we would talk to him after the main event and I said sure. After all this was one of the rudest people I had talked to in a long time and he deserved it.

So when the main event was over she came by and asked us and the other people sitting ringside if we wanted to have our picture taken with the fighter who won. We said we did and then proceeded outside and had our picture taken with him. After this Sarah asked if we were still willing to talk to her boss. I said sure and she then lead us into an office. Up until this point I thought I was just going to talk to some manager but I realized I was quite wrong. This office housed the guard secretary who you had to go through to get into the main office.

Once we got in he asked us what happened with the boy. I immediately noticed how he spoke perfect English while everyone else spoke broken English at best. I recounted the story, albeit a shorter version. At this point, the guy told us how these boys are paid by commission and they are supposed to go out and get tourists to come to the fights who didn’t even know they were happening, not collect commissions on people already planning to attend. He told us how much he appreciated us telling him this. He said if he went out into the stadium people would avert their eyes and stay away from him (as if he was a deity). He is incredibly wealthy by American standards which makes him unfathomable to Thai people. He told us the kid would be fired the next day.

Then he asked us where we were from and Mike said Canada while I said the US. He asked, “Where in the US?” I said the major city near where I live. When he asked what part of the city I was from I told him I actually live an hour west of it. He said, “Oh Scotsdale?” which is the tiny town I am from that people from my state haven’t even heard of. I was blown away by this and we ended up talking about it. It turns out he went to school in my state, his niece goes to college in my home town, and he knows the place where my summer house is like the back of his hand. He travels to my state every year.

During our conversation with him we found out that he is the vice president of the World Boxing Association for Asia. Also during the twenty minute conversation we had I wrote down my name and e-mail address and gave it to him. In return he gave us each a business card. During the conversation he gave us free ringside tickets to the fight tomorrow night, the biggest night of the week.

(We also talked for a while about stuff like where we had traveled and where we were going. I told him how I do martial arts. I figured these things could easily be left out of the story)

When we left the office Sarah told us how this is just one of his many businesses and money is not important to him (referring to the free ringside tickets). She said the tickets he gave us were VIP tickets given to politicians and people from the ministry. We were the first people in the history of the stadium to ever talk to this man in his office.

When we came back the next day Sarah was thrilled to see us and took a picture with us and before we left that night we exchanged e-mails and she told us to send her a message if we were ever coming back because we would never have to pay for tickets to a fight at that stadium again.

Apologies to all the people i could not answer, but life has kicked in full force for me as i am not only working again but also looking at multiple buisness opurtunities. I will be asking a mod to close this thread as my busy schedule and limited time do not permit me to keep up.

Thanks to all those who participated, it was my pleasure to help. In the future i may reopen this thread but life comes first...so until then i bid every one adieu.

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-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."