You've probably all heard of Mystery's 'Cat String Theory' and how a good PUA must be the "dancing string." Well I need to know how this can be done in a date situation. For example this weekend I'm meeting up for coffee/going shopping with an HB9 that I kiss closed at a party. Is it right for me to pay for stuff (i.e coffee/buying her presents)? In other words, can I be the "dancing string" without coming across as being cheap?

Perhaps I should mention that I'm 17 so most of my targets are in the 16-19 age range; I guess this makes a rather significant differance :p

I don't think you should buy her what she is shopping for, but if you guys end up at starbucks buy her the thing shes choosing.

Just putting my 2cents

"Cat string theory" AKA Push / Pull AKA 2 steps forward, one step back

= Give her a little of what she wants, and then take it away, making her chase you, instead of you pushing her and pushing her. It shows the confidence of a man who knows what she wants, is willing to walk away at any moment, and has complete control of the situation.

In KINO, this means touch, then break, touch, escalate, break contact again, re-engage and escalate further, then break again, etc. This works all the way up to sex itself. You can have her completely naked on your bed, having some great foreplay, and then just get up and leave the room for 30 seconds. You can be pounding her and then just as she's about to cum, pull out. After a few times doing this, when she finally does it'll be AMAZING.

In terms of IOIs, this means give her an IOI, then soften it with an IOD, for example "you know when we first met, I wasn't sure about you, but actually you're a way cooler person than most of the girls I usually meet around this area. Shame you're still a bit of a dork though "

In terms of moving the relationship forward, it means having a great time with her one day, and then not replying to her texts for a few days so she's not sure where you stand, then getting back in touch all smiles and fun, saying you were real busy, having another fantastic time, and then dropping off the planet for another few days. She never knows where you guys stand, is always thinking about you, and you have total power.

In answer to your question, don't pay for everything unless you are already in an actual relationship and you want to pay because you really really like her and you think she deserves it. Would you pay for drinks all night for a guy you just met who you're just starting out being friends with? No. So what has this chick done to deserve presents and a meal from you? You're just using the oldest trick in the book to try and make her like you and this is deeply unattractive.

A fun way to deal with payment is to flip a coin for it (credit: SashaPUA on here for that one). You can also just offer to split it.

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"A fun way to deal with payment is to flip a coin for it (credit: SashaPUA on here for that one). You can also just offer to split it"

Thanks, I totally understand the logic of push/pull, especially in terms of kino and IOIs. However is there still not a danger that if I offer to split the bill then I'll just come across as cheap rather than confident?

I know everyone in the community says don't pay for anything but, I don't give a shit. If I ask a girl on a date i'm paying, I'm sure as shit not buying her any presents or anything like that but dinner/movie/coffee yeah i'm buying.

I talked to this girl a few years ago who told me a story about a guy that she went on a first date with, they went to dinner then she told him she had to pick something up at walmart. When they went to walmart the guy paid for her item then put the change in her bag and told her to keep it. LOL

I guess the moral of the story is there's a difference between Chivalry and Pathetic.

That is pretty sad :/ I'm just trying to find a way to be generous without being needy and paying for affection. :p