| brief summary of my date on 7.5.09
Fantastic first date- Hottest girl I've been out with in some time. She bought us dinner, I bought us wine and
movie tickets.
I was adhering to Mystery Method and it was working great- comfort building kino, push and pull, sexual tension, did my best to convey genuine interest. I wanted to make sure that we got our time in together before I began to seriously escalate physically.
I could tell that she didn't want the date to end when we got to her house at about 130am. We had been hanging for about 6 hours by that point, enough time to move into Seduction phases.
It was easy for me to get into her house. When we pulled up to her apartment lot parking lot, I simply asked if she would mind if I came in briefly for a drink of water. She said sure, as long as I gave her 30 seconds to briefly clean before I came in. I sat in the car and listened to the radio for about 5 minutes and made my way up to her apartment at about the same time she was leaving to come check on me. She handed me a beer and we went inside. She showed me a picture she painted etc. etc. We made out on her love seat and she kept giggling, as if she was shy and was laughing at the situation, sort of bugged me, but I could tell she was into it so I pushed her down onto the love seat and began to sexualize the situation.
When she started objecting because 'we barely knew each other' and 'this is too fast' I just agreed with her verbally and kept at it physically. Eventually I had to resort to the first of many Freeze-outs that I would use that evening. And this is sort of funny, during the first freeze out, I asked to use the bathroom in her small one-bedroom apartment and she told me that her Mom had had a fight with her boyfriend and was staying over at her house and sleeping in her bed. She wanted to warn me before I walked into the bedroom to get to the bathroom. And sure enough, when I quietly crept into the bedroom, I saw two mom-ish cankles poking out at me from beneath the sheets. I briefly thought of the girl I was with aged ahead some 30 years. Would she too eventually develop cankles?
She clearly didn't want me to leave and she made us a vodka tonic. In a few minutes we were on the floor of her living room going at it again. I was rubbing her tits over her blouse, then under, and massaging her butt, trying to reach far enough to stimulate her vagina. She was moaning and kept saying 'I love it, but I can't.' and wouldn't allow me a gentlemen's chance at taking her pants off. So I froze her out again. I sat up on her love seat and began looking through her DVDs. She tried to kiss me again and I sort of ignored her. She apologized and I told her it was all good. We went outside to sit in the foyer of her apartment complex and had another vodka-tonic. We were definitely getting tipsy. She brought her guitar and played a song she made up. I played some song I knew. And then we were making out again. I opened the door, got her inside and down on the floor again. This time, with the alcohol doing it's job, I went super-caveman, held her hands to the floor, got her shirt up and popped up her bra, took my shirt off and was on her skin-to-skin and it was nice. Lots of lovely moans and thrusting and physical pleading, until I couldn't take it anymore, I grabbed the hem of her jeans and went all out for the buttons. She could barely speak, but grabbed my hands and moaned something again about 'loving it, but couldn't' then something incoherrent, then something about being on her period. And I was so horny, I ignored everything she was saying and slipped my hands down the back side of her jeans until I could get a finger into her pussy from behind. I remember hearing that if you get a finger into her, and basically keep it there until you get her pants off, she won't resist. But the jeans were so tight-and I'm not fucking Houdini- I couldn't keep my finger where it was and get her pants off with my right hand... how the hell do you do that???? I went for her pants again and she said very clearly this time that she was on her period and we couldn't have sex. When I had my finger in her, I didn't feel a tampon or pull out a clot of blood or anything, so I think she might have been lying about her period. But nonetheless, I couldn't get the damn jeans off, and when I was trying to, she was pulling her bra back on and her shirt back down, then stopping me from getting her jeans off, so I eventually gave up, we chatted for a bit, I told her we would hang out again soon, and headed out. It was around 4am. She didn't want me to go.
In between the second and third freeze out, she kept telling me that I had all the signs of a player- being touchy, stopping to get a bottle of wine for the movie, and prying my way into her house under the pretense of getting a drink of water... but hey, she was the one who offered me beer instead and hung with me for nearly four hours at her place and then didn't want me to leave. Now, I'm a little worried about whether I'm going to get another go with her. If not, it's certainly no big deal. I don't have oneitis for her.
I'm going to try to get her back out by calling her up and instantly picking up on a subject from one of our dinner conversations - try to reconnect with the comfort stage of things and see if I can get her to feel ok with me and what we've done together already after only really knowing each other for about 9 hours.
I'm sort of breaking out of the Novice stages of Pick-up, moving into Intermediate. My experience is limited, but I have had occassions where I physically escalated too quickly, often in venues where follow-through wasn't possible and I experienced what Mystery describes as 'Buyer's remorse.' Though the girl was aroused and enjoyed the sexual physical intimacy, the next day when you call she won't answer because she's embarassed that she did stuff with you while barely knowing you. In this case, I at least put some time in before escalating physically, but it was still the first date.
How does this work?? If I had fucked her (and fucked her well) would I have a virtual guarantee that we'd hang out again. Would it have made a difference?? Any ideas on what I should do now? I'm going to send her a text tomorrow morning, telling her I had a dream that we were running away from Decepticons (The movie we saw was Transformers II) and I was trying to get her to run faster, but she couldn't keep up with me, so I eventually picked her up and carried her and she was safe. I think this will get the right idea across. Although, I don't know. I'm very weak with NLP. Of the two times I've seriously tried it, once I was almost slapped, and the other time I made the girl cry while remembering how happy she had been with her ex-boyfriend.
Thanks for reading this post- I thought the material would be interesting so I didn't try to condense. But if you felt this was unduly long, please express your opinion frankly so I can better calibrate my forum decorum.
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CHAT
