| I know we all know how this feels but the pain was so much deeper for someone who's all too familiar with social dynamics and pitfalls you have to avoid, someone who should have known better, a PUA. Its like being a fitness instructor waking up one day fat and addicted to glazed donuts. Its funny, and embarrassing at the same time.
He had approached countless girls, accumulated numerous numbers, gone on dozens of dates and he found himself stuck on the one girl he couldn’t have.
One of my closest friends recently found himself tangled in friend zone. He met a girl while sargin at a bar, went on a date, but there was something different about her from the moment he met her. He went on 3 dates that week but this was the only girl that made him say WOW! He grew so attached to this girl who only saw him as a friend.
He thought he could put her in friend zone and go for her friends instead, but we are all human and we cannot always control our emotions. They hung out for almost 3 months, doing everything from movies to dinner to even spending Valentines Day together. Spend enough time with someone you like and you will only get more and more attached.
We all know we should avoid it, but we're human and sometimes it gets the best of us. Remember we always want what we can't have and this made him want her even more.
He didn't just talk about other girls, he sarged in front of her, in the club, even went out with her friends, but what he failed to realize was he was only doing this to show her he wasn't into her. He wasn't sarging for himself anymore, he was sarging for her. He wasn't fooling her either.. He was only fooling himself into thinking he was over her.
When that happens you know you're hooked and you’re only torturing yourself by being around her and watching other guys make their move.
Time came when she could see right through him and he had to admit what he felt. He poured his heart out, going against everything he knew as a PUA, told her he cared greatly for her. No, he didn’t have any fantasies that she would have a change of heart and reciprocate his feelings. He's a PUA, we know there are no story book endings. This wasn’t one of those romantic comedies.
He understood where he went wrong. It was the chink in his armor – he was too careful in the beginning (not as aggressive). This happens to girls he really likes. He didn't blame or hate her for his mistake.
He knew that the best thing for both of them was to stay way from her. What made it so hard was that he got so close to this girl, he now considered her one of his very closest friends.
After a week of being depressed, he saw the movie "Just Friends" and had an epiphany. He realized that once you step into friend zone, no matter how brief... any romantic chance you have with that girl evaporates.
A girl will always have a couple of romantic options (guys she is interested in romantically), a friend who likes her will end up being a dog by her side waiting and begging to get her attention. The only way she is ever going to notice that dog is if she is the unluckiest girl and all her options fall apart. Your odds of winning the lotto are higher coz most girls will always have backups.
Lets say none of her options work out and she realizes you have been there all along. You even get married and have kids, do you live happily ever after... WRONG. You will always be the guy she settled for. No matter how you look at it, if any one of those options worked out she would have never noticed you.
So as painful as it is to admit do you really wanna be the guy she settles for? If you have any self respect, I would think you would want someone who will reciprocate your feelings not by default but because she sees you as an option.
Bottom line is if you are going out with a girl you really like and feel its headed toward friend zone do everything in your power to right the ship, if all else fails, you're better off just walking away to avoid getting hurt.
Any comments or thoughts about friends zone will be appreciated... Hope no one has to go through that ever again.
Game On!
Casanova _________________ GAME ON!
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