So I was on a day 2 with this girl last night, and we decided to watch a movie over at her place. I didn't immediately start the kino as some have suggested on these forums, as her initial body language was closed (knees up by her chest, leaning away). She eventually opened up, and I moved to the hand on the thigh, followed by very gentle tracing of her leg with my fingertip. She didn't seem all that responsive to it, but definitely didn't make any move to pull away. A little while later though, she had her legs draped over my lap, and I escalated the kino a bit, by going directly skin on skin with her leg, and moving up her thigh ever now and then. She seemed very comfortable with it and eventually had her hand on mine.

I did not move for the K-close during the movie, or any further escalation than what I previously mentioned, both of which may have been mistakes. When the movie ended (2nd X-Files movie), we both agreed that it SUCKED, but then she said she was tired, got up, turned on the lights, and started washing out the cups we'd been using.

She gave me a hug afterward, and I went for the kiss close. She did not pull away, or anything like that, but she was FULLY close mouthed, puckered lips. No passion whatsoever in her lips. I was pretty shocked, we talked for a little more, she gave me another hug and I went for a second kiss. Once again no pulling back, and she seemed receptive to the idea of it, but still completely closed mouth, like you'd kiss someone on the cheek.

Either this girl is the absolute worst kisser in the entire world, which I doubt, or she's totally not in to me, or some third option I can't even think of.

So guys, have you been in this type of situation before, where everything seems to be going well with the kino and physical contact, but then she shuts down for something as simple as a kiss? I was thoroughly confused, I have to say. I don't know if I did something wrong in between the kino escalation and the kiss, but if she wasn't in to me in the first place, then I am confused as to why she made it so easy to escalate the kino during the movie. Any ideas out there?

Thanks team.

I hear you bro. I had a similar experience like this. Basically what happened was, the first time I kissed her on our first meet it was pathetic. She was almost closed mouth, even worse I got some teeth. I was thinking to myself, "This chick is the worst kisser in the world". The second meet got a little better. I think she was more open to the idea and prepared for what was coming and henceforth, the kiss was much, much better.

So, I would say that the girl you are talking about is interested in you, but she is still a little guarded and hesitant. If your situation is similar to mine, maybe she will be more mentally and physically prepared the next time you meet. If you believe that people's physical demeanor expresses their emotional state then your girls kiss was a good indicator of that.

Also, as I'm sure you're aware of, you may have had more success if you targeted your kino a little better. The finger up the thigh is definitely good, but holding hands isn't going to lead up to a passionate kiss (unless maybe both of you are virgins). As for the timing, I would have gone for the kiss before the movie ended. As soon as you thought the movie was boring she was probably thinking the same thing, and working up to a kiss then might have been a good idea.

I like to play with girls. I like to give them subtly erotic kino and then go hands off leaving them wanting more and building up tension. But this method is for another post.

There are some girls who are just horrible kissers. In that case, if you care, you should take charge and just say, "Didn't your ex-boyfriends teach you how to kiss? Well, you are lucky you met me because I'm going to be the guy who taught you how to do it right."

Anyways, good luck and keep us posted on what evolves.

Clozer

This has not happened to me yet but what i can say is you mistimes when you went for the kclose if it had been played right you could have even ended up with a fclose.
When you had your hands on her thigh and you were getting really close that's when the kclose should have occured. At that moment in time the mood was set for something to happen.

Later you moved in for a hug after she had washed the cups you had been using at that time there was no excitement,no nothing in the air so she's probably going to feel like not kissing you.

Your problem was the Kino.

Kino is a process...you can't escalate then stop and expect to jump jack on where you were before an hour later. If you stop at any point you need to go back to the beginning, you should have kissed her during the movie.

- Memento

_________________
"Love is three quarters curiosity." ~Casanova
Hominem Unius Libri Timeo



Diploma in Clinical Hypnosis -- GHR & NHS

Thanks for the reply guys. I'm usually pretty good at the escalation, but in retrospect I definitely didn't work it properly here.

Follow up question then (assuming she's down to hang out again when I call her). How would you treat this situation with her moving foward? My initial instinct was to give her some playful teasing about being the worst kisser in the world, and me being willing to give her another shot, but it may be best to just not even bring it up. I don't know. Clearly my instincts have been wrong most of the way through with this one, so what do you guys think?

Shades, if you can do it with humor and you know her enough that you think she might be able to laugh about it, then your idea isn't so bad. I would suggest, though, going self-deprecating with the humor instead of aiming it at her, because if she's a good kisser and feels the problem is on YOUR end, she's only gonna be MORE put off by feeling like you've insulted her. She won't take it as a joke, but will likely feel you're a guy who's blaming her for bad kisses when it's really his fault...which in turn makes you look like you have no idea what to do with a woman. See what I mean?

The plus side is she let it happen twice without stopping you, so there's some level of interest, but if she's not a bad kisser and has just been humoring you because she likes you but there haven't been fireworks with the timing, she won't be patient a whole lot longer.

Dealing with a VERY similar situation myself right now...thread's also in this forum in case someone gives me advice that might be helpful to you as well. I used directness and humor to defuse my situation too, btw.

Sounds like she allowed it but it wasnt in the right frame of time.

Usually when the time is right, its do it now or miss the chance.....Be like trying to play a arcade machine when its turned off and powered down...IM putting quarters in but its not working!?!?!

Whenever your inches from her face and shes comfortable with this position, watch her eyes, catch her looking deep into your eyes or at your lips, then go for it...what better time? It'd be more awkward to not make a move and act like "being that close" just flew over your head like you were not in the moment.

What do you think Shades was going through her head while all this touching and what not went down during the movie?

Honestly I think Memento and Abdul hit the nail on the head here. The kiss close should have come during the movie while you were feeling her and all. Read up on the Gunwitch Method. I'm sure if you were hornier you would have went for it earlier and it would have ended up better.