Hello,

I met a girl the other day at the university where I work as an office assistant. She was looking for someone in my department whose door is next to where I seat but the person was not there and she decided to wait outside for a few minutes. I used this opportunity to start talking to her. I could not be very flirty since some of my coworkers were around and they could hear but spoke with her for a little while. So when she was about to leave I decided to say: "Hey, you know there are some hidden elevators if you go this way and it's even closer to you, come let me show you". That way I could move away from my coworkers and get a little privacy with her. When in front of the elevators I told her that she looked really cute and that she should give me her number so that we could keep on talking and get to know each other better. She smiled when I said this. I immediately realized that I had left my phone at my desk and I thought it would be awkward to walk over there and get it so I just told her: "I don't have my phone on me right now actually, but you can get my number and text me with your name so I have yours". She agreed and saved my digits. She then asked me if I had an Instagram and I told her: "Yeah, I do, but I don't want you to be all over me checking my pictures so soon. Maybe we should get to know each other a little better first" (I said this with a smirk on my face). She opened her mouth and eyes and then smiled as if surprised by what I said. She said bye and got on the elevator.

Several hours later that day I was thinking that I was not going to get any text from her and then... I got a text from her saying: "hey this is (name) happy face". I did not reply that day since she took so long to text me. I waited until the next day and asked her when would she be free so that we could meet up. She didn't reply to me. I waited two days and reopened the texting. She replied saying she was sorry and she was busy studying blah blah, so after a short text conversation I asked again when would she be free to meet up. She proposed to meet up at school at lunch break bus since I know lunch dates are infamous for falling in the friendly category, I said: "That's sweet, but I have a better Idea. Why don't we meet up after you finish with school that day in the evening and we can go shoot some pool". She said: "I would like to get to know you a little better before we go out, just like you didn't want to give me your Instagram". I said: "Ahh payback time. I like you! Ok, fair enough, let's meet up at (location X) at 12:30Pm, unless you have a better spot. She agreed and we did not text until that day, which was like 4 days in advance.

When the day came, I texted her letting her know that I was on my way and that I would save a table if I got there first. She showed up and sat down opposite to me. I told her she was too far away, and that she should seat closer to me to reduce the "interview setting". She sat at 90 degrees from me and started talking. I could see that she was a little nervous at the beginning, so I tried to make her feel comfortable by looking relaxed and talk about fun topics, she started to loosen up and giggle at my sexual jokes. When it was time for me to leave I told her It had been fun talking to her and that we should do something else another day (but I didn't want to arrange anything just yet).

I waited three days to text her again. I mentioned an inside joke about a traditional dish from her country. and she replied by saying that we could go to (Place C) to eat some of that. I texted her saying: "Yeah, maybe. This week I am going to be a little busy, especially the weekend, but let me know how does your schedule look like and see when we can agree on a time to do something fun" She did not reply. I waited until the next day and said: "So, what do you say?" No reply... I don't want to appear needy so I am not sure what I should do. Did I fuck up somewhere? I thought things were going pretty well... Is she playing hard to get?
Any advice is greatly appreciated.
Thank you!

You're playing "too cool"

Busy people don't have to say they are busy because they actually are busy.

Whats the use in dangling the fact that you're going to be busy in her face as if it matters? Why not just tell her when you're available to meet up? It would of been no different if you said " I can't meet today, I have to take my brand new 2 million dollar lamborgini to the repair shop" , instead of just saying " I can't meet today, how about tomorrow? "

What makes you think a girl can't see through that? And if she sees through it what makes you think that wouldn't turn her off? Just be authentic.

You already double texted, you're going to have to lay low for a bit. Give her a week and see if she pops up, if not pick up the phone and give her a call.

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Hi Eddie,

You bring a good point. Maybe I overdid it by saying that... You made it clear as water. I am still working on calibration, before I used to be too available and now, trying to move on the other direction, I am coming off too obvious with that intention. I will take your advice and wait some time and see what happens... and be more subtle pointing out I'm busy in the future.

Thank you for the imput.
-Z