Hey man,
I've been daygaming for quite some time now and one of my favorite activities has been boldly approaching girls everywhere and getting their phone numbers. Anyway, I soon realized that getting a random girl's phone number on the street and elsewhere is no guarantee of getting her out on a date later.
So, it took me years of trials and errors before I've learned from my failures and found out top players' well-kept secrets on how to make sure that she answers your phone calls and replies to your text messages.
That said, lately a guy has posted his story titled
Daygame Flakey Numbers on my busy blog's popular discussion on the subject on
what's holding you back from enjoying your true success with women and unleashing your best in seduction, and he's asked me the following questions:
1. How and when to ask a girl for her number?
2. How to make sure that she answers your phone calls and replies to your texts?
3. What to text her to bring her to that same state of her attraction that she felt towards you on your first encounter when she happily gave you her number?
4. How to tell when she's attracted to you during that first meeting?
The following is the summary of my answers to the guy's above questions.
How and when should you ask a girl for her number?
The guys who told you that you should always make sure that she's attracted to you before you go ahead and ask her for her number were right. I'll go into much more details on the subject on how to read her body language signs of attraction when addressing the last question that's about "How to tell when she's attracted to you just by looking at her body language?" and here I'll just give you an introduction to it and set you in the right direction.
First things first. When should you ask her for her number?
Put simply, you can go ahead and ask her for her number immediately after you notice that she's flirting with you and enjoying your company overall.
To get the girl that you've just met to flirt with you, the easiest thing I suggest you do is to say a quick, playful line known as a banter line. Banters are the most effective verbal attraction tool that work on most women as long as you wisely choose to say those banter lines that feel totally natural and fun to you, because if they don't feel totally natural and fun to you, the girl will get a sense that what you're saying to her is fake because she'll be able to tell that you don't really believe that what you're saying to her is real and right to you just by looking at your body language and picking up on your negative emotions. The truth behind this stuff is this:
"Your beliefs control your emotions, and your emotions control your body language."
The important bit on using banter lines the right way is that you need to make sure that you always use them in combo with your
negative body language.
In short, once you notice that she's playing along with your banter lines, you'll be able to tell that she's officially flirting with you and chasing you. In other words, she's attracted to you.
Apart from making sure that she's first attracted to you before you go ahead and ask her for her number, you also need to make sure that she feels totally comfortable around you and she's enjoying your company overall. The precise term that addresses her comfort with you is rapport. The best way you can tell that you've built a solid rapport with her is when you two get engaged in a very deep chat about the subject that you both are interested in.
A crucial bit that you need to pay attention to when communicating with a girl during the three important stages of an interaction such as attraction, rapport and seduction is knowing how to touch her the right way at each one of these stages.
To wrap up dealing with your question that's about 'When to ask her for her number,' my answer is: Ask her for her number after you've successfully attracted her and built rapport with her.
So, how to ask a girl for her number?
As you could realize from your own experience, getting a girl's number is not hard. But what many guys don't know is the right way to ask her for her number. What I mean by the right way is asking her for her number with confidence and assertiveness so that later when you call her, you stand a good chance of having her answer your phone calls and reply to your text messages.
Here's an extremely important thing that I want you to understand when getting a girl's number without having her avoid returning your phone calls and texts. You should never force any girl to give you her number just for the sake of giving it to you so that at the end of the day you feel like some kind of winner. Instead, what I warmly recommend you do is that before you ask any girl to give you her number you always have to make sure that you've properly attracted her or that she's already attracted to you.
But the funny thing is that even if you've done a great job of powerfully attracting her on the first encounter, that's still no guarantee that she'll answer your phone calls and return your text messages. Why?
It's because of the following important dating truth that I want you to understand and remember:
"A girl’s emotion of attraction to you is as short-lasting as a fire that dies off once you stop stoking it."
What this means is that every time a girl gives you her number, you should always assume that her attraction to you is most likely going to be dead. In other words, you should understand that you'll most likely have to attract this same girl all over again almost as if you two have never met before.
Man, I know that this sounds like a very silly thing but this is what it is and how it is in reality.
Back to the matter on how to ask her for her number. There're essentially two ways you can ask her for her number:
1. The 'yes ladder' method.
You: "You have email?"
She: "Yes."
You: "OK. Write it down here" (NOTE: In this case, you'd confidently get out a pen and a piece of paper out of your pocket and hand it to her.)
You: "While you're at it, write your number too. Sometimes, I'm not good at email."
The reason why it's called the 'yes ladder' method is because you want to get her used to saying 'yes' to you right at the beginning. In other words, you're indirectly making her get used to complying with your requests by first saying 'yes' to you and then by giving you her email address with ease. As a result, she most likely won't give you any resistance to giving you her phone number too.
Once you get very confident at getting girls' numbers, I suggest that you skip over asking her for her email and you just say to her with confidence: "Nice meeting you. I've got to go now. Write down your number here."
2. The method of making her happily offer to give you her number without you even asking her for it.
You: "Nice meeting you. I've got to go now."
She: "Nice meeting you too."
You: "I've really enjoyed our conversation and feel that we should continue this chat next time. What do you think?"
She: "Yeah. I think we should."
You: "Cool. So, what do you suggest as the best way for us to keep in contact?"
She: "I'll give you my number."
Man, this is my favorite way of asking a girl for her number because I really enjoy when she happily wants to give it to me rather than when I need to ask her for it.
By the way, the above method reminds me a lot of a sales technique where you make your potential customer happily want to buy your product or service without you even asking them to buy it. It's an awesome feeling to enjoy because it's like you're making them sell your product to themselves instead of you selling it to them. I know what I'm talking about here because I used to work in sales for years.
Next I'm about to share with you top players' well-guarded secrets to getting her to answer your phone calls and to reply to your text messages.
There's a very important tip that most guys don't know when it comes to getting a girl to answer your phone calls. So, what's this tip about?
As soon as she happily offers to give you her number, you should separate yourself from the majority of guys by making sure that on the first encounter you not only prepare her for receiving your phone calls but also that you make her feel happy and excited to pick up the phone every time you call her.
Here's what you should do. Before you even write down her number or type it in your phone's contact list, you should say to her the following stuff.
You: "OK. Here're the rules. Now, a lot of girls give me their numbers and I can't call all of them. So, I'm going to call you but only if you follow these rules."
She: "Why?"
You: "Every time I call you, you have to be so happy to hear from me. You have to say 'Oh, my God!! Naz, you're so hot! I'm so happy that you've called!'"
She: "OK."
You: "Alright. Let's practice. Now, pretend that your phone is ringing. What do you say?"
She: "Oh, my God!! Naz, you're so hot!! I'm so happy that you've called!"
The good thing about getting her to practice answering your phone calls is not only to prevent her from flaking on you but also to reinforce her attraction to you through this kind of fun and flirty role-playing with you. Dating is all about flirting and every time you stop flirting with a girl, you face the risk of completely killing her attraction. So, by doing this fun and flirty role playing with her, you're keeping her in her flirting mode and you're also increasing your chances of having her not only happily answer your phone calls but also flirt with you on the phone too.
Once you do the first round of having her practice receiving your phone calls while you two are meeting on the first encounter, I suggest that you get her to practice it one more time.
You: "Let's practice it one more time, because I'm now actually going to call you."
As soon as she does it again, you ca n say to her the following: "Now, save my number in your phone and put my name next to it so that when I call you, I'm sure that you know who's calling. I want you to see that's me. That way I don't have to call and you'll be like 'Hello, who's this?'"
You continue: "I don't want to hear you saying to me 'Hello, who's this?' I want to hear 'You're the hottest guy! Thank you for calling.' Got it?"
You: "So, save my number under my name so that you know that's me every time I call you, OK?"
Man, this is exactly what you should do every time you get a girl's number if you really want to make sure that she's not flaking on you when you call her later.
I want you to always keep in mind that most girls are socially conditioned not to call guys back and not to answer guys' phone calls. So, don't be surprised if you sometimes experience this kind of situation even if you got the girl to practice to happily answer your phone calls on your first encounter as I've explained to you in my previous comment.
That said, I want you to understand that if the girl is not answering your phone calls, that doesn't mean that she doesn't like you. What this tells you are just two key things:
a) She's socially conditioned not to answer guys' phone calls even if she was hugely attracted to these guys in the first place. So, that's why you should never take it personally if she doesn't answer your phone calls.
b) You'll have to do your job of attracting her all over again as if you two have never met before.
But don't get discouraged because there're two good news:
1.You can still attract her all over again via text.
2. Most girls like to use text messages as their favorite communication tool when dealing with guys, especially the guys that they've just met.
Now, you might be asking: "So, what's the main reason why girls flake on me after they happily gave me their number in the first place so that I have to attract them all over again?"
That's an awesome question. Apart from girls' social conditioning, another reason why they flake on you when you call them or text them is because you have to understand that most girls won't be in that same emotional state of attraction as the one when you first met them because they often lead very mundane lives. And, their everyday mundane things like their jobs, their family issues and meeting their friends all make them distracted enough to almost forget that they've ever met you. This is the good reason why you should learn how to spark their attraction to you all over again via text.
I'm happy to tell you that I've written a whole separate article on
the text game and the little known 3 flirty text messages that you should send out to girls in order to fire their attraction up and eventually get them out on a date with you via text. To learn all the details about
the text game, I suggest that you simply click on one of the links to this subject that you can find inside this post.
Once you learn the secrets to the text game, you'll get my answer to your third question that's about 'What to text her to bring her to that same state of her attraction that she felt towards you on your first encounter when she happily gave you her number?'
So, how you can tell when a girl's attracted to you during that first encounter?
In my first comment I've shared with you the basics on how you'll be able to know when a girl's attracted to you. Here're I'm going to go a bit deeper into the subject on how to recognize
the girl's common signs of attraction just by looking at her body language.
There're three main signs of her attraction to you:
a) Every time you touch her, she touches you back.
b) She starts to constantly move her body in many different ways that all tell you that she's actually trying to grab or get back your attention. The best way you can recognize these body language signs of her attraction is whenever you notice that she makes different kinds of gestures or moves such as streching her body, playing with her hair or fixing part of her outfit, for example, just to get you to pay attention to her.
c) She's constantly facing you with her whole body. In other words, her face, her breasts, her shoulders, her legs and her feet are all facing you during an interaction. By the way, this sign of girls' attraction is one of the most important and most overlooked female body language signs of attraction. Furthermore, this sign is so important because it often means that the girl is actually giving you her sexual come-on. So, make sure that you don't miss it.
To read the full original version of this guy's post titled
Daygame's Flakey Numbers and my answers to his questions, just click on the link to it from this thread and feel free to join the discussion by posting your own comment.
Hope you've found this stuff very helpful.
Bruno
CHAT
