So, the community has great stuff to offer for approach/seduction, and 1 or 2 good products for keeping a GF.

What seems to be sorely missing is early relationship building and damage control. I'm certain most guys who practice at all get plenty of day 2s, but SOMEHOW 2nd and 3rd dates are fairly scarce. I've gone out with at least 20 women in past year, and only 4 went past the first date!!! What's so frustrating is I usually have no idea why! She'll just go dark on texts and calls...which I don't need to say is the most irritating thing...and they all seem to love doing it.

I get that it all boils down not just to things going smoothly, but building enough Sexual Tension and intrigue that she just has to see you again....push/pull, tease, banter, etc. I'm not bad at Comfort building and geting sexual quickly. I'm very sexually confident, I'm decent looking and even have a good job for Christ's sake! lol By all rights I should have no problems, but it seems like the ones I like I don't see again, and the ones I'm not all that into I sleep with right away.

I think women have so many options these days with internet dating etc. that they have trouble making any choices at all, and will drop a guy cold over the littlest thing. It would make sense if they did want you to succeed (as coaches profess) but all evidents points to the contrary. They're looking out for a reason to Disqualify you like hawks. Thats plainly obvious.

There's certainly a correlation between extent of sexual progress and probability of seeing her again, but its non-linear. If you have sex on date 1, your very likely to see her again. But if you have a heavy makeout session, it seems like your less likely to see her again than if you only kiss once to say goodnight. So I just try for sex everytime now. But that's not how most dates end up, and anyone who says otherwise, I have al lot of trouble believing. Maybe guys in New York can plan the perfect ways to wind up at your place, but even though this is standard advice, most people don't live close enough to dating locals to work that angle. So if she's not down to do it in a car or go home with you to "watch a movie", your sh1t out of luck.
...maybe that was a slight tangent, my bad.

So, what I'm looking for is effective ways to ensure a continuing relationship during and after day 2, and any ways especially ways to get her attention back after a good but maybe not spectacular 1st date. In short date 1 damage control.

THANKS for indulging my ranting and raving!

and for any sage advice you can give or recommended materials that may cover this subject I'm not aware of.
(the only one I'm familiar with is "Girlfriend Training" by Xuma).

How many of them did you actually want to see again anyway?

Bring yourself to a level of sexual options and get more personal on your introduction. Connect. If there is no connection then don't call them back. Let them chase you.

Maybe stop dating? I don't date all that often. I invite out. I go out with closer friends to have a good time and I invite people to tag along. That's a better way to build a personal relationship in a health way. It's not sacrificing sacred friend time to be with a stranger who is putting out.

Maybe do something more fun for a date. Don't get to know each other through interviews about history. Just have fun. Make it more like when you first meet a girl at a bar or club and you're just having fun and enjoying company. Don't find out any baggage until later on.

Some girls will sleep with you just because it's a date, or go on a date and try to interview you. Maybe you should screen out the ones who are just in it for the food and want to make check marks. Fuck those girls. They sound boring as shit anyway. ORRRRRRR make those girls do something fun with you like indoor rock climbing or go-kart racing. That's REALLY what a date is. You want to engage in a fun activity. It lends itself to having an escort. Let her escort you. That's a date. Also, it brings her into your world. It involves her in something that you're into. It adds to attraction and gets endorphins flowing and doesn't involve a food coma. It's memorable and thus more special in her mind.

Don't be overly enthusiastic about a second date. Maybe you're coming off as too needy and too into her. Maybe she doesn't want the pressure. Maybe it's unhealthy for you to be invoking that pressure, and it's a personal issue you have to tweak out. Take a good look in the mirror about it. Write a journal. GFTOW

_________________
Attraction is a choice.
ITS YOUR CHOICE!
Spread Love
-Ders


www.facebook.com/spreadloveders

Truly solid advice. Thanks bro! Think I'm stuck in a date route[read rutt] actually. Same bar for 90% of those! So mixing it up would prolly be good just for me as well. Lol the past few felt stale and that's prolly why!

Any words on waking up a post-day 2 non-replier? I'm thinking leave it alone for like a month, then text random invite to fun casual stuff events etc.

Nah man. Freeze out. If she's interested then she'll call you back. The whole date idea is just so full of pressure. If you don't both have the same view on where you're going in life, or if your views don't gel with each other, then there's no point in getting to know each other further. Avoid that. Let them get attached to you and like you for who you are, then pick one of the many that interest you as far as what would work the best. The "love" factor comes from simply spending that time and investing in the relationship, and the puppy love phase fades eventually anyway. It's better to have something that actually works well, so when the puppy love fades you're still with your friend that you care about but also sleep with and put babies in.

_________________
Attraction is a choice.
ITS YOUR CHOICE!
Spread Love
-Ders


www.facebook.com/spreadloveders