Hi guys so I recently posted this thread problems-moving-into-the-kiss-close-nee ... 17656.html about how I hooked up with a girl on my course at uni. Problem is I'm pretty sure I didn't build enough comfort on the night out, some of the best conversation I had with her was hungover pillow talk or before drinking at my friends place.

I'm seeing her tomorrow on a pub crawl (yes I know drinking and gaming isn't a great idea but I make exceptions when I can expand my social network... and have fun ). I'm inclined to see if we can't have a repeat of the previous night, or at very least establish a friendship rather than have an awkward relationship with her in future.

What I was thinking of doing was asking her for a drink she owes me (we were doing rounds), if there's any resistance playfully use some role reversal telling her it was her idea to go back to mine, then say either "I knew I'd just get hurt again if I let myself be vulnerable" or "I'm not just a piece of meat you know". This will have to be done in isolation as we've kept the night a secret, thus why I'm asking for the drink.

So yea I'm planning on using humour to break any awkwardness, then building comfort with conversation/having a fun on a night out (pub crawl is perfect for this as I can build familiarity over several places). Hopefully I'll land another kiss and set up some sort of meeting in future, possibly go home with her again it depends how this plays out.

If it all goes tits up no worries I've got a fun night ahead, I'll stil lget to meet some cool new people.

Any thoughts on how I'm approaching this?

Thanks

The trick is to first act like nothing happened. When you see her, I'd approach her in a familiar, casual, friendly way. Try to open with familiarity, something simple. It's time to play the low key game, and not the aggressive wolf game. See if the conversation picks up and read her. At this point, she already knows 70-90% of how she feels about you and the whole situation, so you have a little room for prying if that percentage is negative, but not much. Flow in conversation and pick up the comfort building at the point where you feel it fell short/got distracted. Do the role reversal only if she gives a completely negative vibe, and brings it up of course. Otherwise, don't bring it up yourself. Do you know already that she DIDN'T want only a one night stand of sex? Are you sure about this?

I've had this sweat a few times personally, recently actually, and after everything was all said and done, the girls sat me down and tried to give me the, "Hey, I just want you to know that this was just sex, and nothing more...blah blah blah." I was like wait, what? No, I'm supposed to be saying this to you! lol.

The key...Act as much as you can like nothing happened sexually, and if you read the situation as even slightly positive, act a little like you are wanting to become "friends". If she feels negatively about the situation, this will force her to a) admit sleeping with you to a third party b) keep the negative feelings about the situation inside and to herself or c) discuss it with you and perhaps change her mind. A and B are not very good options for her. You have the power in this situation, thanks to your gender. It pays to be a male sometimes.

Also, all of ^this aside, it might even be as simple as inviting her out at a later date to something the two of you can do (if you're actually interested), which will display that you're not ONLY after meat.