Don't know what I'm doing wrong, how to keep her interest



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*generic_username*
PostPosted: Wed Oct 15, 2014 5:25 pm 
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She is engaged and asking questions via text... She seems into you.

I don't really see her interest level wavering, honestly.
It seems that way to me also, but the only doubt that I have is that she has NEVER texted me or contacted me first. I realize she's only 19 years old and girls my age tend to be much less confident, but for whatever reason I have my doubts. Maybe I'm just psyching myself out and everything actually is going smoothly. To be honest this is one of the more attractive girls I've dated so my normal confidence isn't all there. Could have a lot to do with it. Thanks for the encouragement!
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oceanx
PostPosted: Thu Oct 16, 2014 2:22 am 
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You have got to plan your strategy in advance. You have stated that your goal is to have sex with her. That being the case, going out to lunches and coffees with no plan for a transition to a sex location is not in line with the goal. The next time you get her out have a clear plan for escalation. If it means she has to come to your place for the date, fine. If it means you rent a room, fine. Set the stage so that the sex can happen if she wants it; as you said things are getting stale.

That is excellent advice. One must always adjust himself for the situation. Just have to find a way to arrange that without sounding too blatant... Straightforward is the best approach but it'll be difficult to plan a date around sex, usually that is supposed to happen spontaneously...
Basically you have the plan but make it seem spontaneous that you are transitioning to the sex location. "I know a cool spot." Drive to the sex location.
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Dane40
PostPosted: Mon Oct 20, 2014 11:38 am 
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It's just the recent flakiness that has been getting to me. Would it be a good idea to stop communication for a few more days and make her worry a bit?
I was in a similar situation recently. She was flakey, but I was really into her and always found myself sending the first text. Then I did this: I waited for three days and then I sent her a text that was "supposed" to be to my buddy. It went something like this:

ME: "Hey man. Sorry to hear about your leg. Say when, if you still need my help with the boat. Take care."
HER (like, immediately): "Oops. I think you sent this to the wrong person :wink: "
ME: "Oh. Yeah, it was for my friend Dan" (Her name starts with Da as well)
HER: "So, what's with the boat?"
ME: "Nothing. Just helping out my buddy. Anyways, we should get drinks soon."

So, htis tactic allows you to re-initiate texting without sounding needy. Also, you can use the message to "Dan" to demonstrate value. In my case, I tried to appear generous and helpful. If you're more creative than me you can probably take it even further.

Good luck.
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*generic_username*
PostPosted: Mon Oct 20, 2014 1:29 pm 
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Quote:
It's just the recent flakiness that has been getting to me. Would it be a good idea to stop communication for a few more days and make her worry a bit?
I was in a similar situation recently. She was flakey, but I was really into her and always found myself sending the first text. Then I did this: I waited for three days and then I sent her a text that was "supposed" to be to my buddy. It went something like this:

ME: "Hey man. Sorry to hear about your leg. Say when, if you still need my help with the boat. Take care."
HER (like, immediately): "Oops. I think you sent this to the wrong person :wink: "
ME: "Oh. Yeah, it was for my friend Dan" (Her name starts with Da as well)
HER: "So, what's with the boat?"
ME: "Nothing. Just helping out my buddy. Anyways, we should get drinks soon."

So, htis tactic allows you to re-initiate texting without sounding needy. Also, you can use the message to "Dan" to demonstrate value. In my case, I tried to appear generous and helpful. If you're more creative than me you can probably take it even further.

Good luck.

Thanks for that. I'll definitely keep that tactic in mind. Unfortunately this weekend she flaked big time. Sometimes I guess they just lose interest. I think I'll hold off on communication for at least a week unless she reaches out to me. Think this one fell out of my grasps. Oh well, her loss! Thanks to everyone who helped me out here, love this community and without it I wouldn't have been able to get a date with her in the first place!
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oceanx
PostPosted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 4:47 am 
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Joined: Sat Nov 09, 2013 9:50 pm
Posts: 2864
Quote:
Quote:
It's just the recent flakiness that has been getting to me. Would it be a good idea to stop communication for a few more days and make her worry a bit?
I was in a similar situation recently. She was flakey, but I was really into her and always found myself sending the first text. Then I did this: I waited for three days and then I sent her a text that was "supposed" to be to my buddy. It went something like this:

ME: "Hey man. Sorry to hear about your leg. Say when, if you still need my help with the boat. Take care."
HER (like, immediately): "Oops. I think you sent this to the wrong person :wink: "
ME: "Oh. Yeah, it was for my friend Dan" (Her name starts with Da as well)
HER: "So, what's with the boat?"
ME: "Nothing. Just helping out my buddy. Anyways, we should get drinks soon."

So, htis tactic allows you to re-initiate texting without sounding needy. Also, you can use the message to "Dan" to demonstrate value. In my case, I tried to appear generous and helpful. If you're more creative than me you can probably take it even further.

Good luck.
Nice. Here's another example of that:

"wear the red skirt u had on @ the party"
(her reply)
"oops wrong allison"
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