Hey all!
Here's a situation that arose this week and I was wondering everyone's point of view here on what I should do.
I've been out the game for a while and focusing on music, but I recently decided to get back on the horse anywho....
I was out at a club in town and I happened to see a chick I know (we'll call Tina). Very cute, though a lot younger than me. She's 18 and I'm 30. Admittedly I've been attempting to hit on her sister (We'll call Alice) (20 years old) a couple of times and there's been a couple of strange kissing moments with Alice though it's never gone anywhere plus Alice has a boyfriend now.
I've always had a good friendly relationship with both Tina and Alice with a good level of fun and rapport though I've never been out separately with Tina.
I say hello to Tina in the club and she's happy to see me and very quickly tells me that she's broken up with her boyfriend (who I know) and that she was the one that did the breaking up. I take that as an IOI though maybe that's unjustified.
She later moves on although I see her again later in the night in another club again pleased to see me etc...
I decide to drop her a text over Facebook.
The next day she replies and we go back and forth with some fun texts and banter. I run some very solid text game on her, get her mobile number and we agree to meet up for food during the day time at a Brazilian place.
We finally meet for food during the day time. The fact that she chose to come out with me as just me and her sounds very much like a date to me and shows that there is a large level of interest in me on her part. Why else would she agree to come and grab food with me?
As we chat and eat, the conversation is easy and fun. We play some games we talk. I drop a little SOI in that seems to be well received. We talk about her thieving things jokingly and I say, "I find the idea of you going round robbing whilst wearing a trilby quite sexy... Don't get a big head about that though.."
She laughs and there's nothing to suggest she feels awkward or anything.
We leave the food place and as we walk off she brings up coming out with me again, which I consider an IOI.
I have a level of Kino with her, I talk about her perfume and how good she smells to which she says thank you.
I move her hair back and look at her cool earrings. I even lightly tug on the back of her hair whilst I look at my phone and she doesn't stop me or pull away or anything. I even smell her neck.
All seems pretty good but I do make a big blundering mistake!
I'm aiming to go for the kiss close with her as things have been going quite well but I do it at a bad time. It was difficult trying to find an appropriate moment. We walk about 50 metres from her work which is a diner type of place. The conversation has died down a little as I begin to add more pressure to myself in leaving the date with at least a kiss close. At risk of sounding a bit arrogant I'm normally pretty good with kiss closes and normally when I swing for the seats I get reciprocation. However there have also been quite a number of 'what if' moments in my life where certain chicks I've liked have seemed into me and for whatever reason I haven't pulled the trigger.
That's why in this situation I decide once again to swing for the seats despite my perhaps better judgment of realising things are on the come down.
I then say "Right I better let you get to work."
Keep in mind this is in the middle of a busy very public street. I go to hug her and she then goes to kiss me on the cheek and I go to kiss her on the lips. She's confused and a bit embarrassed and I kiss her on the lips again without her reciprocating (so I'm basically just kissing her face lol). She looks quite shy and very embarrassed and she says my surname, 'Johnson' with a "what the fuck are you doing??" sort of tone to it.
I reply with a mischievous, "What?"
I then realise this is going nowhere and continue to walk with her to her work whilst talking about getting to work myself (all in an obviously embarrassed tone on my part).
I felt as though I'd left on a bad note so within a couple of minutes of leaving her I try to do some damage control with a slightly apologetic but humous text saying;
"Sorry it's your perfume it made me do bad things. I'm bad haha."
Moments later I get this reply from her;
"It's ok I'll forgive you haha."
This seems very positive. I think to myself that I've just timed the kiss wrong but there certainly seems to be a level of attraction going on. I've run some good text game and had a decent level of Kino (though could certainly have been smoother).
I give it a couple about half and hour as that was the time it took me to get back from town. I then send her this text and this is where I think I went really wrong (nooooooooooooooo!! Haha);
HERE'S THE TEXT I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE SENT;
"I don't think you should forgive me tbh I'm really bad haha. Can't promise I won't try and do it again. I can only promise my timing will be far better hahaha. Had fun out with you today anyway. Enjoy work and don't steal anything unless I'm with you
"
The "steal anything" is a direct reference to something we joked about earlier.
The reason I sent that text is because I wanted to get a gauge as to whether she was interested or not. I'm not used to messing up on kiss closes so all thoughts ran through my head like, "maybe she just sees you as a friend etc..." I thought that if I send her that text and she replies then I can consider that a massive IOI and a sign that she's very into me but the time in which I chose to kiss her was all wrong. Maybe if I tried to kiss her in a less public place she'd be up for it.
Anyway, needless to say I got no reply from that text and I started to regret sending it as things actually seemed to have been left on quite a good note despite my initial 'faux pas'. I resisted the urge to text her again the same night as I thought it'd come off too needy. I didn't send her a message the following day either. I just got on with my life.
Today I sent her a 'radar text' to gauge how things are. Again I've probably mistakenly put all my cards on the table in saying I may well try to kiss her again so any reply from her may well mean a big time IOI. I sent her this joky text about an irrelevant subject based on my pervious night;
"Had a bizarre evening... I saw a man in drag who I swear looked as if he was sneaking puddings..."
Again no reply. Admittedly my text didn't warrant a reply but if she read it and found it funny, that is a good thing, with or without a reply. I'm certainly not sending another text to her over he next couple of days as I think it'd be too needy.
What do you think guys? What should I do?
Do I assume she wasn't interested in me at all and just saw me as a potential friend? In which case I've misjudged everything terribly and possibly need to do some serious damage control by texting her and genuinely apologising for "threatening to try and kiss her again" haha. I wouldn't normally do this but as I'm friends with her sister and these are people in my social circle rather than simply being some chick I met out one night, this might be a valid option because I want to avoid burning 'friendship bridges' if poss.
Or do think this is still salvageable? Is she just playing hard to get? In which case what do I do? My plan has been to give it a couple of days and then send her another 'radar style' text to seem if I get a response or ask her a direct question to see if I get a reply.
Thanks for reading and it'd be great to get all your thoughts here
CHAT
I was planning to do exactly what you've outlined but I just needed some reassurance in that decision and to reaffirm my realisation that those last couple of text were definitely BAD! Haha. No more "fucking texting shitty stuff professing how mischievous and naughty you are and how much you like her...". At least I know not to make that fuck up again. Cheers