Hey all, I'll cut right to the chase:

So I've met this chick in a club last weekend, we kissed and later on exchanged numbers. In following days I've only sent her few texts - nagging and building up for the next date. Never replied instantly, always waited for some time to pass

Date happened on Wednesday. I picked her up, when she got into car I've hugged her (to let her know you're comfortable).. We went bowling (she beat me, lol - but she's practicing that for 14 years, so it was expected), I kept it cool and joked about it, so afterwards I said since you won, I'll take you to a glass of wine.

There was definatley alot of IOI/Kino, but kept it cool throughout the evening. When we were walking to the wine place, I've placed my hand over her hips - just like it aint a big deal...then later on in the place we talked about travel and other topics which aren't boring (there was no awkwardness).

That took about an hour, maybe later.. when we finished with drinks, we went outside - it was raining so I opened my umbrella and held her close to me so she wouldnt get wet.

We walked a little, then I've stopped, turned her against me and kissed her. No resistance whatsoever, in fact it was hard to stop kissing Then we walked to car, some more kisses, drove her off to her place (student apartments, she has a roommate) kissed her goodnight, and then she said she had a great time.

When I arrived at home, i've sent her text "that no matter her skills in bowling, I've still managed to won 1 game ".. next day she replied "yeah, because I've let you won it ", I texted 2 hours later "Don't flatter yourself have you slept well?"

.. then nothing..no reply whatsoever. Waited for a day, then I've texted her again "I had a great night yesterday, totally in style "enjoy life".. and you're a great kisser too but I don't think I'll be going bowling with you again, since you beat me so badly " ... and now it's been 3 days and no reply. Where did I go wrong? I got my text game good since I made the date happen.. When should I send next text? And when I do, if she ignores I'll let it go and move on to next adventure

I have been thinking to use one of the texts from this forum - "I've got something to ask you, I need you to be honest and serious about it..." - which I'm sure you all know where this goes further on

bump

Here's where I think most people on this forum would say you went wrong: you made her feel like SHE'S the prize and gave her the power by saying "I won 1 game" as opposed to making yourself the prize. Also your failure to move on to another thread other than just the bowling thing (which may get tedious for her... it's a new day, find something else to joke about) may have cost you a bit. You don't have to go overboard and outwardly make YOURSELF the prize, you just have to imply it.

I wouldn't say it's over, but let her be for a bit then maybe reopen in a week or so. I have had success with the "lemonade or coke" reopener, but, that works better for me when it's been like a month.

Invite her out to a place you're already going. If she says no or flakes I'd move on. In the mean time go after other chicks.

go get more girls

I have no advice to give you, but I would like to know how this turns out. Keep us updated!

Hah, so little update, which explains the behaviour. Yesterday I've added her to facebook, and today she accepted the request. But didn't respond to / ignored text I've sent her week ago. Now I see her profile and she's in a relationship. I've gotten myself into the middle of a broken relationship.

So delete and move on, nothing to do here?

Ahhh, that sucks. You going to pursue it or move on?

_________________
D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

I don't really know how to pursue this, I believe it is a waste of time since she would be constantly changing her mind... you agree/disagree? If you disagree, how do you think this should be handled?

I don't think adding her on fb did you any favours if she wasn't replying. I suffer from too much chasing, I fail to see it when im doing it but I can see when others are.

I'm done chasing. I'm exploring, experiencing, getting feedback and looking back at what things I've done wrong / the reasons behind it. Adding her was more of an experiment than anything else + I found out the reason behind flaking But im interested in theory, how would one pursue this further? Opinions are valuable piece of information.

Regarding your date, I think you did well with the k-close and it sounds like you have nice vibe.

Regarding the texting, I agree with Blues Man, you might want to set yourself up as the prize a tad more. No need to tell her shes a great kisser, I would go for a decent kisser, or not a bad one. Also it comes off as you try to qualify yourself by telling her youve won one game. But this is details, seems like you have shit under control.

She still feels something for you, if she really wanted to end this, she wouldnt add you on fb. Possibly she thinks youre really nice and doesnt want to string you along. Adding you on fb might be her (a little cowardly) way of telling you shes in a relationship.

To proceed, I would talk to her straight about the relationship status, ask her where that is going, and if it was me, tell her nicely that we can go out again when she sorts out her relationship.

Be careful and dont get into a position where she is with someone else while you take her out for drinks and kisses

My bad, I see that you added her and not the other way around, but still, if she thought it was completely over, she wouldnt accept your add

If I were you, I would ditch the texts about small talk. Either start texting sexual messages (such as in Slipknot's text thread, it's pretty useful since you already kiss closed her) to arouse her and build attraction or if not that then wait another week or so and try to set up a next date. No small talk anymore, all that is doing is making you look needy. If there's another date take her for drinks and if the vibe is good (I wouldn't even mention the fact that she's in a relationship) then kiss her again and take her home. Don't just kiss close then leave it at that. That is what happened last time and look where that got you. She seems like the kinda girl who gets caught up in the moment then when she looks back at what she did later on she has remorse. Use this to your advantage and go as far as you can go in one night. If you bring her to a bar that has dancing and all that, go on the dance floor, make out, feel her up, get her all aroused, tease her a lot (physically and verbally). Then try to bring her to your place or go to her place. If she doesn't invite you in ask to use her restroom. Then ask for a tour of the place and when you get to the bedroom do your thing. But if there is no next date or any sexual text exchange I'd count your losses and find other girls.

Hey all, I'll cut right to the chase:

So I've met this chick in a club last weekend, we kissed and later on exchanged numbers. In following days I've only sent her few texts - nagging and building up for the next date. Never replied instantly, always waited for some time to pass

Date happened on Wednesday. I picked her up, when she got into car I've hugged her (to let her know you're comfortable).. We went bowling (she beat me, lol - but she's practicing that for 14 years, so it was expected), I kept it cool and joked about it, so afterwards I said since you won, I'll take you to a glass of wine.

There was definatley alot of IOI/Kino, but kept it cool throughout the evening. When we were walking to the wine place, I've placed my hand over her hips - just like it aint a big deal...then later on in the place we talked about travel and other topics which aren't boring (there was no awkwardness).

That took about an hour, maybe later.. when we finished with drinks, we went outside - it was raining so I opened my umbrella and held her close to me so she wouldnt get wet.

We walked a little, then I've stopped, turned her against me and kissed her. No resistance whatsoever, in fact it was hard to stop kissing Then we walked to car, some more kisses, drove her off to her place (student apartments, she has a roommate) kissed her goodnight, and then she said she had a great time.

When I arrived at home, i've sent her text "that no matter her skills in bowling, I've still managed to won 1 game ".. next day she replied "yeah, because I've let you won it ", I texted 2 hours later "Don't flatter yourself have you slept well?"

.. then nothing..no reply whatsoever. Waited for a day, then I've texted her again "I had a great night yesterday, totally in style "enjoy life".. and you're a great kisser too but I don't think I'll be going bowling with you again, since you beat me so badly " ... and now it's been 3 days and no reply. Where did I go wrong? I got my text game good since I made the date happen.. When should I send next text? And when I do, if she ignores I'll let it go and move on to next adventure

I have been thinking to use one of the texts from this forum - "I've got something to ask you, I need you to be honest and serious about it..." - which I'm sure you all know where this goes further on



bold is where u messed up brotha