So uhm.. The next step?



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 Post subject: So uhm.. The next step?
PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 12:36 pm 
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Location: London, England
Hey all..

I have quite abit of background with this HB9 i went out with yesterday. I've been together with her on and off a couple of times. She have taken the initiative to contact me, and we saw each other last sunday. The date went fine, just at movie in my bed, alot of kino and kissing, but nothing more than that.

Before she went home sunday, she asked if we should see eachother tuesday, but i couldnt give her an answer yet, so i told i would call her.

Then mondayafternoon i got this text from her :

Her:"Hey sweety, have u had a nice day:)?"
Me:"Yea, just fine. I hope u had a great day too!"
Her: "Should we gettogerher on tuesday?:)"
Me: "I call you up tomorrow afternoon, im abit tired, so im hitting the sack. Sleep Tight"
Her:Okay thats fine, sweet dreams"

Anyways, the date didnt set up, part because i forgot to call, and her being abit ill..

AGAIN she started texting me wednesday i think it was, if we should find something out this weekend, we did.

We went to the movies(Yeaa.. bummer :P) and then going to shoot some pool.. The night was great, had ALOT of social proof in this place.. Friends i hadnt even seen for quite some time, also were there coming up greeting, it was awesome.

After pool, we decided to go to her place, and open a wine and play some games
Anyways, when the night went to the bed, and I was about to do what I DO!

I was about to go down on her and she said "Dont get started, its this time a month"

I seriously got frustraded, played all my cards right. Now i get lack of confidence, asking myself "Couldnt i turn her on?" "Does she really has it?" and stuff..

My reaction was abit stupid.. Told her fine, and stopped the playing. And then we just spooned.


Well question is.. Should I be the one texting her first, building some rapport, or should i just chill it, and make her make the next step?

I can't figure out, if this is a shit test, to make sure im not just in it for sex?

Whats your take?

And if i'm to start, what to text/call her?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 2:47 pm 
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She could have really been on the rag man. It can be genuinely embarrassing if she doesn't let you know. If you still want to fuck her - the proper response is "No problem babes."

As for what to do now - I recommend
playing your favorite video game/opening a cold beer and watching TV/Working out/ whatever you do.
Then, while you have something else that your interested in doing, text her whatever you want: for me that's usually, "Whattup shawti aka (her name) lets get together and chill on (whatever date)" Or just call her and basically say the same thing whilst "shooting the shit."

After that forget about your phone and get into whatever your doing. If she wants to see you: cool. If she doesn't want to see you: cool, you tried anyway.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 3:01 pm 
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Thanks for the response..

I want to fuck her, done it before long time ago, and we are starting to see eachother again..

The first time we dated, i was alittle clingy, didnt know this PUA shit.

One of my biggest regret was that i showed i was abit irritated last night, and i want to fix it.. thats why im asking for advice, wether to call her up, or wait couple of days, to see if shes still interested, to make her know that im not another chump who would kill for her.

But i dontknow.. She have been talkin abit about relationship.. But i just dont want to come of being pushy, lost her on that before i think.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 7:02 pm 
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Quote:
She could have really been on the rag man. It can be genuinely embarrassing if she doesn't let you know. If you still want to fuck her - the proper response is "No problem babes."

As for what to do now - I recommend
playing your favorite video game/opening a cold beer and watching TV/Working out/ whatever you do.
Then, while you have something else that your interested in doing, text her whatever you want: for me that's usually, "Whattup shawti aka (her name) lets get together and chill on (whatever date)" Or just call her and basically say the same thing whilst "shooting the shit."

After that forget about your phone and get into whatever your doing. If she wants to see you: cool. If she doesn't want to see you: cool, you tried anyway.
So i wrote her sunday with something like "Hey pumpkin, i had a nice day, hope you enjoyed it too. Sleep tight,mys"

She replied instantly with "Hey sweety, i sertently did:) It was very nice:) You sleep very well too:) mys"

I wrote her last night at 23. Me :"Hey sweety, i hope you had a nice day, and recovered from your ill(She have been abit ill). We should gettogether again soon. How does your schedule look?

Today at 16 i finaly got a reply saying :" Hey sweety. It seems like i didnt get the message sent yesterday. Yes, we should find another day soon. But its unlicky i get the time this week.

The first thing i noticed was she had removed all of her smileys, she usually gives me them alot..

Whats your take? How should i handle this? I really like this girl.. But it seems like i need to find SOMETHING to get her tempreature up? I dont know.. damn.. help!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 9:17 pm 
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Location: Vancouver, BC
One piece of advice I can give is don't over-analyze the text too much.

And though you like the girl, you are running the risk of one-itus, and may come off as needy and clingy towards her, which from what you said had happened before.

Go and find another girl. When you convey that disinterest and disengagement it works wonders.

Already from your posts I have noticed a change in the way you're acting towards her.

At first she was initiating the texting, and asking YOU to hang out. Now she is the recipient, so maybe cool it down a bit. Cure that one-itus.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:02 pm 
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Quote:
One piece of advice I can give is don't over-analyze the text too much.

And though you like the girl, you are running the risk of one-itus, and may come off as needy and clingy towards her, which from what you said had happened before.

Go and find another girl. When you convey that disinterest and disengagement it works wonders.

Already from your posts I have noticed a change in the way you're acting towards her.

At first she was initiating the texting, and asking YOU to hang out. Now she is the recipient, so maybe cool it down a bit. Cure that one-itus.
I hear ya..

The reason i initiated couple of text after our night, was because i wanted to insure her that i wasnt upset or anything from not letting me fuck her that night, thats it.

I responded her text message today with your advise in mind.

"Hey sweetz. Nothing we can do about that, no worries:) you know how to reach me. Sleep tight, kiss ;)"

So ill just move on now and dont worry about it, i will let her take the next i guess

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- You miss 100% of the changes you dont take.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:16 pm 
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Posts: 6
Location: Vancouver, BC
Best of luck with that man. Let her sweat it out a bit.

Also, remember, if she doesn't wise up, its her loss.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 11:48 pm 
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The scenario where you tell her: It's ok that we're not having sex is kinda stupid because it's not ok for you to not have sex right? So you lie about the subject. You want to have sex and that's the bottom line. When you say to her that it's ok for her to refuse you stuff it's a giant decrease of value.

When you text her the next day and say: It's ok to say to me to not have sex with me... (that's what you're basicly telling her). Even bigger decrease of value.

If you want something in life make sure you get it bro.

So the approach should have been: No problem. And don't bring the subject up again, she will sence that you didn't like it. She will maybe even feel bad about it and will try to make it up with you... WITH SEX.

This is a lesson you must prove on the next HB9 whom refuses to have sex with you.

Riqueza

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jan 12, 2011 6:40 am 
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Joined: Thu Jan 06, 2011 9:36 am
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Location: London, England
Quote:
The scenario where you tell her: It's ok that we're not having sex is kinda stupid because it's not ok for you to not have sex right? So you lie about the subject. You want to have sex and that's the bottom line. When you say to her that it's ok for her to refuse you stuff it's a giant decrease of value.

When you text her the next day and say: It's ok to say to me to not have sex with me... (that's what you're basicly telling her). Even bigger decrease of value.

If you want something in life make sure you get it bro.

So the approach should have been: No problem. And don't bring the subject up again, she will sence that you didn't like it. She will maybe even feel bad about it and will try to make it up with you... WITH SEX.

This is a lesson you must prove on the next HB9 whom refuses to have sex with you.

Riqueza
I basicly said that in my opinion. Havent broght the subject up. Texted her last night, no answer. So i guess its lost.

_________________
- You miss 100% of the changes you dont take.


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