First real date in 7 years



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PostPosted: Mon Apr 12, 2010 10:17 pm 
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Joined: Sun Apr 11, 2010 9:08 pm
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Hi

This is gonna be a relatively long post. I put the questions in bold if you want to skip directly to them, although I think my story is relevant. :)

I'm new to this forum, and a lot of stuff here has already helped me a lot. I'm 22 and I havent had a real date since I was like 15. I just read the Game and started reading up on a lot of stuff on this forum. This helped me approach a girl at a party I was at this weekend. Our eyes met, and I could tell she liked me. I went over there and talked to her, and the conversation went awesome. It turned out she was completely sober and I was very drunk, and she still ended up being the one who suggested giving me her number, so I must have done something right :D

Like I said I havent had a real date in years, and I was thinking about calling her this wednesday for coffee. I'm really nervous about this, and right now I'm actually nauseous, and I can't sleep. I really like this girl and I would like to start a relationship with her.

I was wondering if you guys have some tips on how to really calm down the nervousness before the date, and especially ON the date. I was kind of cocky at the party, and I think that went well, and I think this is part of my "inner self" that I have never been able to let out because of my social shyness. I was hoping to maybe do this on the first date too. Also I was wondering if you think inviting her and her friends (if she wants to bring them) to a party this saturday if the date goes well is cool? I do not yet know if the party is going to be a real party or just me and two friends :P (they're the ones who are inviting)

Thanks guys!


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 12, 2010 11:30 pm 
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Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 5:41 pm
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Location: Portland, Oregon
Torden,

Congrats on the number close and the use of inner game! Now to your questions...

My best recommendation for calming your nerves has to do with training your mind. Think of how you acted the night you got the number close. Picture it in your mind and assign a body motion to it, such as breathing out slowly. Keep doing this periodically throughout the day every day that you can. Eventually you will train your mind that every time you breathe out slowly you'll go into the mindset that you had the night of the number close and you'll have the calm nerves that you desire.

In regards to the question about inviting them to a party, I say go for it! It will DHV by showing that you are a social person that gets invited to cool functions. Also, if she brings her friends then you won't have to solely concentrate on your target. You could possibly game some of her friends causing slight jealousy and thus making your target compete for you. All in all, it's your call but that's a possibility.

Hope that helps.

_________________
<Jac>


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 13, 2010 6:52 am 
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Thanks a lot Jac! Thats awesome advice, I'll try it out for sure.

I have another question now. Is it cool to call her one or two times without actually setting up a meet? (Or maybe call her the first time just to show her I have balls, then start texting) Considering she was sober and I was drunk I feel like she has an advantage. It would be cool just to talk to her to get a bit relaxed before the first date.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 13, 2010 6:23 pm 
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Location: Portland, Oregon
Torden,

I would for sure give her a quick call to show that you're confident. At the beginning of the call just put in a false time constraint that leaves her wondering or DHV. Such as, 'I got to go in a bit, I have to run and meet [some girl's name] for coffee' or 'I have to run, meeting some of my buds at the gym'. Whatever you want, have fun with it. Just make sure your time constraint does its job of DHV. By doing this, your little 10 minute conversation will make you look better and her leave her wondering and wanting to compete for your attention.

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<Jac>


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