Well, you already screwed up... but I suppose you can recover.
Usually I just make my title, "Hey" if I have nothing better to write, it's a pretty safe bet. The title should be intriguing (excluding the other one). One of the title's I used recently was, "ouch" because we hadn't talked in a day or two and I started biting my lip. It really hurt, and started to swell.
And usually, I use my first email to build attraction, and maybe make them feel butterflies. I do NOT use it to piss them off... Maybe bust on them a little bit.
This is my email:
"From: -----@hotmail.com
To: ----------@hotmail.com
Subject: ouch
Date: Tue, 23 Dec 2008
Quote:
I keep biting my lip, and it's swollen now. Have you been thinking about me?
>Oh, and by the way -------- isn't my real last name; I forgot to change it. My real last name is ----------.
So Chanel ------ (if that is your real name), since I can't get to know you over a cup of coffee, and I don't want to wait until New Years - I guess we'll have to get to know each other like this. Tell me something cool about yourself. Are you very adventurous? What was the most adventurous thing you've done all year? Actually, a year is pretty long... You can just do the last few months.
Merry Christmas
Her first response was:
Quote:
Yeah I actually have been thinking of you, and once again im sorry for cancelling, Im really busy latly, Ive been working alot and I have to fly to Calgary to see my grandma, She has cancer and wont make it for very much longer, also one of my family members was really sick and passed away a day ago...
I would say Im very adventurous, I am not afraid to try new things. I couldnt even begin to tell you the crazy things I have done so far in my life, would probably make your jaw drop = ) How about yourself? Would you consider yourself an adventurous guy? I cant really tell you something "cool" about myself because the perspective would change from person to person, so you'd have to figure that one out for yourself. And Chanel ----- is kinda my name, My real name is Chanel ------ but I use ------ in respect to my mother because im living with her. Tell me some daily things about yourself?
This conversation took place a little after it. And I've escalated things to the point now where we're talking about
kinky sex. She's pretty damn wild. I used ninjas as a metaphor for having sex in one of my emails, and saying that she has a big crush on them... If I posted them up, then it would make it easier to understand.
And she said she wanted to "feel me out". My response to this was:
Quote:
You want to feel me? Slow down there, tiger, next thing you know I'll wake up in chained to a bed in some strange apartment because you can't restrain yourself properly. What are you thinking of...? You have a massive crush on ninjas, don't you? Or maybe you are a ninja and you wanted a ninja battle of some sort... That'd be pretty awesome. Eying each other down, wondering what your next move will be, and before you know it one person is lying on the floor destroyed. ----
Her:
Quote:
Yeah, it was very...interesting! Me wake up to a bed chained...sounds like a blast! Id be down for that anytime! If you get to know me better youll learn im into crazy fun like that, I really enjoy random kinkiness. So, you were in a movie dressed as a ninja, very very neat. Lol and not a crush, I used to date someone who was a ninja, they were really good, I also used to train ninjitsu but thats in the past.
And she changed the title to, "not so ouch anymore"
For you, I think you should interpret her as being playful. She's qualifying you, and you're failing.
Reframe her response. Right now you look like an asshole, but don't let it affect you. You're better than that. Her first Sh!t test is:
Part I
"i did? hum i dont remeber doing that. infact i dont think i even know how to put up a thing on how we met. "
You can pass this in a few different ways. 1. Call her out on the test. This has a good chance of backfiring... It's not a question like, "what's your job". A response would look like, " Are you qualifying me?"
2. Reframe. This one can have a million responses, and I would highly recommend doing this. You can say, "Okay... sure". or "Wow. It's about time I found a girl with some fire! Nice." Get creative, and you're welcome to use either of these.
Part II:
"p.s your default picture is lame. your just staring at your hand err whatever your holding."
Okay, not so bad... She doesn't even have the greatest grammar. You can call her out on this, but she's not friendly enough to laugh at this yet. You could say something like, "Hey I like your grammar, it makes you sound sophisterckated". Actually... That could work. And the other one could reframe the interaction from being mean to being playful - which the first one does pretty well in doing, anyways. But the one I had in mind was, "Oh? Really? Hahaha... At least my picture doesn't _f.i.ll._i.n_t.h.e_b.l.a.n.k_!"
Hope I helped out,
Roxstar
CHAT