I am into this girl and have been getting pretty close to her. I dont think I have reached the just friends point... but one of her friends came up to me and said i think she likes you. I am just having problems asking her out. I watched vin di carlos texting pick up and i started. here is the text convo:

matt: what are you doing tonight?
girl: idk
matt: i know something we can do
girl: wat
matt: you know what..ill save it for monday night
girl: what is it
matt: monday night
girl: matt no1 knows what your talkin about
matt: whos nonone
girl: haha myself
matt: aright. monday night i know something cool we can do and im not gonna tell you what it is
girl: then im not coming
matt: i thought you were spontanious
girl: hahah whoever said that
matt: let me surprise you... are you always this difficult
girl: hahah im sorry but i am
matt: me too

it ends here and i dont know what to do. you might be able to tell i am pretty new to this stuff. so any advice would help.

This situation happens a lot. You see you tried to control the situation by saying " I know something fun we can do and i am not telling you what it is" and then she tried to gain control by saying " Well done i aint coming"

The way you hit back made it seem like you were kinda begging her to come with you on monday night.

What you should have done when she said well then i aint coming is something like "If it involved handcuffs will you consider coming" (but say it in a normal voice)

She will look at you with a shocked expression. But that's a good thing. Before she can reply say " Oh i see a smile but it doesn't involve handcuffs and a gas mask,whatever floats your boat.

well what do u recommend i do now... i avoided the situation and acted as if nothing happened. Monday has past. should i restart or pull back?

What I would suggest here is to let that particular situation go, at least for the time being as bringing that conversation up could be a little awkward. The next time you are together, talk about something you are doing in the near future. It could be a movie you are going to see, a concert, hell it could even be going to the coffee house and sitting around for a bit. The key is the delivery, you have to make it sound like it's going to be the most fun amazing thing in the world...and then you drop it. It'll give her a feeling of being left out, like she's not special enough to enjoy that time with you. Later on in the night, bring it up again and ask her if she'd like to join you.

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Be predictably spontaneous.

i agree, nice lil plan, have something to add, so u wont have ur guar down if it happens...if she ever asks about Monday night, i mean what was that all about or smthing...just be cool about it,and say :"Was really fun,glad u didnt come..." this will piss her off a bit,but it's ok, she will get the punisment for turning u down, thus putting u in the control area, so that next time she'll think twice about turning u down

Basically there is only one problem with this textconversation... You did not hook her. You did not build enough attraction and comfort to get her to really spend time with you!

You need to show some higher value (as Mystery would say) and get her attention before playing hard to get.
It just is not true that people want what they cant have. I can not have my best friends GF and I do not want her either.
What is true is that if people want something, then if they cant have it they will want it more.

But you need to get that little attraction that will keep her around. Think of it like a seed, if you plant it you can make it grow with various techniques but if you never plant it you can water all you want and nothing will happen.

Maybe I missed this part... You should have built attraction before having this textconversation!

Shit I would have told her that we can watch TV butt naked. That's different.

If you're not going to ask her out then just text a question asking her what's the wildest/kinkiest thing she's ever done. It breaks the ice and it also gives you insight to the possibilites.

I dont think that last comment would work very well.