| Tip 1: don't be that guy
- do not be the typical guy trying to pick her up. The hotter the HB, the less likely that a AFC line like "come here often?" will make her interested in talking to you. Think about mystery's statistics on how often girls are hit on. these girls have been socially conditioned, and here is the result: you say "hey what are you drinking there" and she will interpret that as "hey, i'm desparately trying to pick you up". please understand that is DLV. One of the concepts a PUA must understand is that unlike men, women will hear the words you say, and often interpret them with that sort of emotional filter, rather than a logical breakdown of what each actual word means in the context.
Tip 2: don't give in to your fears
- don't ever back down from approaching a girl for the wrong reasons. here's a good reason: my friend knows the girl and says she has herpes. here is a bad reason: i don't think i'll succeed at picking her up. I'm not going to go too deep into AA and inner game with opening because i feel the deeper you go, the more complicated it is, and the more you dwell on it and experiene anxiety. just remember this comcept: you are a man, girls like men, so be a fucking man. you know when i feel the shittyest as a man? when i bitch out to my fears. when i'm afraid to do something, and that stops me from doing it. when that happens i ache with regret for sometimes days. you know when i feel the most like a real man? when i feel that fear come over me and i fight it, and do that which i'm afraid to do. that makes me feel like a man. and feeling like a man, makes you act like a man. and acting like a man, makes women like you. you know why? cause women like men. thats why. i had AA just like any other guy because i feared rejection. i remember a time when i got over my AA. it was almost instantaneous. i realized that all girls that you can open, are just opportunities. from not approaching and being fearful, i started to wonder "what if" a lot, and i was overcome with feelings of regret, dissapointedment, and frustration. these feelings eventually started to hurt so much, and became so strong, that they eclipsed my fear of rejection. in other words, i started to fear regret more than rejection. when i realized this, i started opening like crazy.
Tip 3: walk before you can run
- start off with false time constraints and leaving the set before closing the set. i can't tell you how valuable this is at becoming more comfortable with opening sets. if you go into a set knowing that you are going to leave them before you give them a chance to accept or reject you, then you immediately have the upper and hand and will dictate the set, and control the frame. for example, you open a set up, you talk for like 2 minutes, and then you say "listen, my friend said he's buying me my next drink so i gotta go find him. i'll talk to you later". thats it. you're done. and you go back later only if you want. whats the point of this? i call it opening with training wheels. you'll know when to take off the training wheels. it will happen when you are working a set and realize: hey, i don't really wanna leave this set, it's going pretty well.
Tip 4: understand rejection
- it's not going to happen as often as you think, but it does happen sometimes. understand this as a PUA: if you are rejected, she is not rejecting you, she is rejecting your strategy. learn to take things lightly, because if she really knew you, she probably wouldn't reject you. unfortunately in the society we live in, there are social barriers that must be broken down, and to do this successfully takes some skill and strategy. i aspire to the philosophy that any guy can successfully close any HB, at any given point in time. it may not always be easy, and in some situtations it may be extremely difficult, but it is always possible. what does that mean? it means that if you use the correct strategies and tactics you will succeed. they don't always have to be perfect strategies because different situations will have different margins of error. sometiems the margin of error is virtually nonexistent. and sometimes its all over the place, and you can say pretty much anything and the HB will eat it up. that's why frame control is so important.
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CHAT
