Hey boys, I read the 'how to edit a story' section on www.seductionbase.com by Jugler. Using that I had a go at using that guide to write up two stories. Now, my main focus was
1: Using stories that actually happened and
2: Using stories that are not interesting so people dont steal your frame putting in their sotry.

I have not tried to embed any DHV's in this story because i think that if i tell enough stories she will see good parts of my personality. An example is being able to cook for the second story.
Any advice would be great, I would love to be able to enhance hidden facts so that they ask you questions during the story. So if you can help with that it would be awesome.

Story 1: The fucked up clutch...
The gears in my car stopped working in my car the other day and fuck they were hard to get in. I think my arm is broken.
(Emphasise how much yours arms are hurting)

So, I am driving through a one lane highway and none of the gears would crunch in. I came to a complete stop and was desperately slamming the gears but all I got was a fork being thrown into a blender. No progress right?

I am stoped on a hill trying to start a car with at least 19 highway vultures behind me getting hungrier by the minute. What do I do? Do I ask for help? Do I break down and cry? Do I take off the plates and make a run for it?



Story 2: Bannana in the satay...
I was cooking the other night and was craving authentic satay.
I'm thinking.... have i even eaten any food today?(emphasise how hungry iwas... rub your belly and groaning)

So its almost done and has five paste's, soy sauce and penut putter but... it was missing something to give it that extra taste....

There... sitting in the corner of the room is this(should i pause here for a bit??) bananna staring me down.
Do i put it in and potentially ruin my hard work for the past
45 minutes? Or, do I throw down and bank on the possibilty of the best satay I have ever made?

If you guys want to use these stories im sweet

Well first of all i have to be honest your stories aren't funny at all. She might think that you are trying too hard if you are using this on any woman.

Why don't you Google " World's funniest jokes" or " Relationship jokes"

Sorry to criticize but someone had to say it.

Dude, WHERE on this post does it say that i was 'trying' to make these stories funny?????????????

If you re-read what i was asking for, it was that I wanted to re-write the stories to use open hooks/unanswered questions so that girls would ask quesitons about the stories. I.E generating interest. I was asking for help for that NOT weather or not my stories were funny because thats not what i was trying to do.

And YES the clutch story works a charm. I used this story on a 7 who... 2 hours later I had naked in her bedroom. It really helped build kino in the begining... AND.... it got her laughing even though i had no jokes in it...because of the way i told the fucking thing. Dude if your on this site to help people out and give feedback that guides people in the right direction that awesome... were all here to share advice and get better at gaming....but if you want to give advice, first you need to read their post properly.