I met a client yesterday for day one of his coaching residential. I began asking him about his background and history in this area of his life, as I do with every client that comes to me, and he revealed such a common belief system among guys who have been immersed in the daygame lifestyle.
He had previously gone through training with a popular London daygame model from some of the “best gamers in the world” he said excitedly. He was informed by this amazing ‘gamer’ that the main area he must work on to sleep with more girls is to approach more women. MUCH more women. All the time. Common sense right?
Nope! Unfortunately there is catch.
This misdirected man, took heed of his heroes’ advice, and did just that. Currently, he spends an average of 20 -30 hours PER WEEK “hitting the streets”, as he calls it. (Or as they call it)
He had an air of pride about this…until I asked him how many women has he got to enjoy and share a sexually intimate experience with.
It was as though he had never asked himself this question. I witnessed him go inward for a few seconds, working out the figures and searching for his numbers.
“In the last 2 years, of about 20 hours per week on the streets, there has been 6”!
He widened his eyes in shock like he had just been hit in the face with the worlds largest ‘jump in front of her daygame stop’. He had just realized it. For the first time.
In that moment, I felt all my past experiences in that previous era of my life, such as sadness, desperation, frustration and anger boil up in me, but I took a deep breath and allowed it to disperse. He looked at me, waiting for a response. I didn’t. I just looked at him blankly.
I asked how many girls he would typically approach per day?
“About 15-20, 7 days a week” he replied.
“Are you not fucking tired?” I asked very matter of factly, “because you fucking look it”, I said.
“What else do you do?” I asked. “Not much really, I am just super focused on getting really solid at game right now” he said. Followed by “I used to do lots of martial arts and loved hiking and stuff, but I just dont have time for that anymore.”
He had a drained look on his face, with pronounced bags under his eyes. He was fidgety, couldn’t sit still, and his eyes were darting around street behind me on high alert, looking for his next approach, in a tweaked out way, unable to generate or communicate any level of presence with me. Literally poisoned.
There is no way in hell any woman will or can connect to this man in his current way of being.
We went for a casual walk as we chatted more, and after 15 seconds of leaving the coffee shop, he sprinted away from me to ‘daygame’ a girl. 5 seconds he lasted and he was back. I held my tongue and continued where I left off. 20 seconds later, boom, gone again, and ‘rejected’ after a very brief interaction where from my experience, she didn’t want to be there from the get go. He was void of any feeling, hanging for the next approach.
He came back, and I said, “Ok, lets go game together. Look for a 2 set and I will wing you man”. He believed I was serious, so off he went. I walked over to the girls after he stopped them in an over the top and straight up weird as fuck way, and said Hi. He introduced me, I nodded and said nothing.
He dropped one of his structured lines: “You look like business club girl, where are your best spots to go?” – I was slowly dying inside. She made a weirded out face, looked at her friend who shrugged her shoulders, looked back at him and responded with “I never go to clubs!? They suck”, to which he responded with “But which ones are your favorite?”…I face-palmed myself and interjected.
“Dude, where did you get the fact she is a ‘business club girl, because anyone who is even a little observant can tell thats most likely not the case’? She is wearing a fucking bikini, with flowers in her hair, and holding a Paulo Coelho book. You also completely tossed away the fact she hates clubs. Why are you not listening to or observing her?”
There was a super awkward silence where the girls just witnessed me scold this guy in front of them (harsh, but needed in this particular case). I apologized to the girls and I went on to explain what we were doing here, and what the purpose of this was. They lit up and opened up showed great intrigue which is usually the case. The girls also gave some awesome advice when it comes to actually listening and having fun with her, rather than super robotically trying to pick her up, which they mentions happens a few times every day in the exact same way.
They knew he was one of those guys the second he stopped them, but they were nice and planned on leaving politely.
We bid farewell to the girls with some hugs and creepy pick-up lines. Low n behold…he was smiling and laughing.
“Fuck…that felt good”, he said. “It was super normal.”
We went on to have a very in-depth ‘conversation’ where I questioned him on everything, and absolutely shook the shit out of him. This allowed him finally to be able to sit in himself and really feel how he is feeling, which he was heavily disconnected from. He had a bit of a cry and released a lot of tension. After this, his energy was vibrant and alive. His eyes were bright.
He physically felt the internal mess he was cultivating all along, which was encouraging him to ‘chase the dragon’ so to speak.
His purpose was game.
His purpose was daygaming.
His purpose was getting responses from girls, the targets and enemies.
His emotional state was based on all the above, and so was his self worth!
When your purpose is the woman, or to game, this is the most hideously repulsive vibe for women to feel, and as discussed in many of my previous articles, they immediately lump you into the same category as every other guy who is not coming from the strongest and sexiest place.
His purpose was on situations entirely outside of himself, which is a deep dark hole I have seen many guys fall down after receiving this daygame coaching from their hero coaches, who are all living the lie in a dramatically edited fashion on YouTube.
These students and clients become fan-boys, the very essence of having no purpose within yourself. They lead you to believe you are becoming your own man, but really you are being further engrained into their gigantic egoic representation of themselves. They train you to be anything but self-reliant. You are coached to be a follower, thinking you are a leader. Its clever huh!
Be aware, there are some men who have taken to this fine, and they are happier than they were before they did the bootcamps, but for how long, and at what internal cost? It is rare!
These companies work on the basis of seeing how disconnected and unhappy you are, then give you a glittery ‘quick fix’ structure and lifestyle, so you can then be just like your favorite daygamers and have the same behaviour, and maybe one day be allowed to work for them…for free…because how lucky are you!
Let me be the first to say that you must look very closely at the success ratio these approach monkeys have. These ‘professionals’(how the hell can you be a professional with women, a human species who are all different? The mind boggles) must approach so many women with their ‘proven structure’ in order to get a ‘lay’.
The few men who work in this area of self growth and ACTUALLY know their shit, whom I can count on one hand (meaning they don’t have to mass-approach, they give of themselves freely and unapologetically without techniques to manipulate the enemy, and who women generally adore being around and being sexually intimate with) laugh at these men, not only on a ridiculous comedic level, but equally with the utmost of concern for the guys who listen to them.
We get the backlash of broken, burnt-out, and aggravated masculinity knocking on our door desperate for something that feels truly real after they have come out the other end of these bootcamps and trainings more damaged than they could ever have imagined. They come searching for something which actually allows them to have profound sexual interactions with the women they choose to meet.
Newsflash: men would not still be watching hours of shitty infield YouTube videos, or even arriving to my content and material if these guys had done their jobs in the first place, which was promised and guaranteed.
Instead they use their techniques and structures to push men away from themselves and cause huge amounts of self-avoidance, making my job a whole lot fucking harder. Cop on!
My purpose of this article is not to target any individuals, that is not my intention, as they are not bad people. They have just went down a certain path which they assume to be the gold at the end of the rainbow, which they then sell that to others. The reason I am writing this is because I MUST mention that the majority of the damaged and brainwashed men who contact me for help, are coming from the same London based models and instructors on a consistent basis, so I feel it is my duty to mention this, in hopes that you REALLY question whether or not to commit to learn from these guys.
This is not a battle of the businesses, or me trying to convince you I am better or you should give me your money. We are not even in the same business. So it is utterly irrelevant.
If I feel into myself and ask the question why am I speaking out on this, it basically comes from the point that I am sick and tired of having to deprogramme guys from all this bullshit behavior and ‘game’, before we can move on to the truly rewarding stuff, which is my own issue.
This process has led to me almost quitting many times, but then I witness the results I achieve with the men who put their trust in me. My purpose is in bringing realness to the strangled masculinity, and we still have much work to do.
There should be a “Yad-stop” stick, where I repeatedly beat a man across the back who decides this is an appropriate way of human interaction for 8 hours a day. But alas…my business may suffer due to excessive violence
If you can relate to the above in anyway, I encourage you to take a break, and stop ‘hitting the streets’ for just 2 weeks. That is all. If you are completely unbalanced such as the above client, it will hit you hard and a lot of emotional resistance will start to come up for you. Sit in it, and listen to it. Its there to save you. It’s YOU!
Besides that, I encourage you to direct your focus not on getting girls, but on your passion and purpose, or at least on the path to figuring what that might be out. Enroll yourself in different classes, try new things, read a fucking book that isn’t about pick-up, and get out of your comfort zone. Many of these places you will meet a wide array of awesome women.
Alongside having FUN with yourself and your friends/ life. If you happen to see a woman you find attractive as you are going about your daily life ANYWHERE, then you BETTER go and express yourself to her.
Remember, the dynamic of pick-up is just as stressful to her as it is for you, which is why you may be getting the “I have a boyfriend line” after 10 seconds, or her walking away from you nervously. You know what women and human beings like? FUN! Enjoy talking to her. She will enjoy talking to you. Stop going over with the military style attack to get her and win her number. Go over to meet a girl you find interesting and/or attractive and see if you can both experience chemistry. Be light. Be fun. Be flirty.Invite her out if you feel like you both have something. (this is also what I guide men on, but it is the least important part of you)
Going out to ‘game’ spreads your desire and power soooo fucking thin, that by the time you meet an awesome girl, you have nothing left for her. She cannot feel you, because you have no clue as to where the fuck you are inside yourself. After all, she is number 25 that day yeah?
Do not be the vacant daygamer. There is already too many of them. It will program you to not even be able to feel her. Which means you will not physically feel her. Yeah…no sexytime!
If you are completely new to this and you want to start improving yourself, get comfortable expressing exactly what you feel and think to women everywhere, but WITHOUT looking for anything in return.
Il say it again….HAVE FUN!
I will finish on this:
Question EVERYTHING.
Question those you take advice from and invest in. Question me. Question yourself. You are in there somewhere, you may just need to do some clarification work to find out where.
You don’t need techniques or structures to GET girls to like you. All you need is your own expression, and the ability to give yourself permission to do it. That’s where I come in.
Woman: So, what are you passionate about?
Man: Sarging, with my wingmen.
Women: OH WOW! I love that. It is so endearing and attractive in a man. Fuck me right here!
Said no women ever…
Chris Bale
CHAT
