| I've read many sites and experienced alot of rejection in my life. I talked with my brother which is a Natural of getting girls. I picked his brain for how he gets women and I couldn't. He told me that he doesn't give a fuck about a woman thinks of him. He approves himself, really! He's in control and "real" with himself than any other woman could make him feel.
Now the question is how do I transfer this give into me?
As learning PUA, I've understood components of how social dynamics really work; which the term is coined by Mystery but however I like "Social Science" better. Don't you?
These are some of the ways to get over "rejection":
NOTE: There is no such thing as rejection!
Why rejection exists: Rejection because it's hardwired into our psychology (our mind). Just like Mystery has said and amongst others, "Rejection exist because in our tribal days; if we approach a woman that is taken, and she's with her other girlfriends. When she rejects you, she'll 'gossip' about how fucked up you did the appraoch. Which will elimanate your possiblities of replication. Another reason is that rejection exists is from back also in the tribal days, where if we approach a woman and she's taken by the tribal leader or one of tribal leader's friends. The tribal friends on request by the tribal leader, will take you and crush your skull in with a rock or some blunt object. You'll then be buried on some isolated area." This is why rejection exists! Also, it has to do with social events and our past experiences.
Is rejection real?: No, it's all in your imagination. The mind runs like a wild monkey, thinking all possible reasons why to take you out of the situation. Say, you had a real bad experience with a woman; say she told you that she'll be hanging out with friend, and on that night is when she cheated on you. Your subconscious mind will prevent you from being hurt in the next relationship you might be in. It's all in your mind!
Desensitize yourself from being rejected!: Go out and do approaches after another and another. Get rejected and keep on getting rejected. This will make you desensitized about the nervousness\anxiety about getting rejected. Rejection stems of having AA. You're afraid of being rejected=Approach Anxiety. You could achieve this fear of rejection by:
1) It's only a fear, it's not gonna kill you...your not gonna die because of it! You're gonna be you and what you do in your little world.
2) Approach people saying, "hi" and if they respond then good; if not oh, well! What worst can happen? Is the HB gonna turn into a two headed beast and rip you into shreds? I think not! Just thinking about it makes me laugh! WHich makes me go to the next one.
3) Once you made approaches after approaches. you can then REFRAME your mind to think of a positive outcome.
Reframing your mind: Reframing is a NLP term to not rewire your circuitry inside your brain, because that's impossible. I thought that was possible when I first heard of the term 'reframing' from Zip. Anyways, reframing your mind is looking at the experience in a new light. For example, visualize the situation then visualize something ridicously getting blown off. Pretty soon you'll be able to laugh at rejection. My examples of finding something funny to reframe the mind is:
1) Say a girl you like or want to approach. Imagine that girl blowing you off in the silliest way! Let's say she made a funny face at you; like raised her hands in the air, sticking out her tounge making goofy sounds.
2) Imagine the girl screaming in fright and dropping dead. I'm laughing my ass here because of that thought! Call me morbid but it's funny!
3) Imagine the HB running away hysterical because you said hi to her, and watching her run into a pole! Yes, guys I watch too many comedies!
4) I like this one; imagine the HB making fun of you calling you ever name of the book. She's so heated up that he head is growing red and I mean beat red to the point her head is gonna explode. Imagine smoke coming out of her ears and her hair bursting into flames. Once she realizes her hair is on fire, she runs around screaming for help when you give her a bucket. This bucket isn't water guys; don't think you'll be so kind to her with the insultive words she told you. So, you give it to her and she looks relieved. She pours the bucket over her head and since it's gasoline she bursts into a human fire ball. Now she's a real HB! She's running around, rolling around on the ground then you grab the fire extinusher and spray her down. Her whole body is covered in white foam. Pretty funny huh? I thought so! Just writing it made me chuckle!
Once you're able to desensitize and reframe your experiences with rejection you'll be able to be almost cured.
It's important to have a wingman or social peer group to help you along the way. A decent wingman will not critize you for your attempt to approach the HB standing over at the bar, but will respect your courage. You need a good wingman to make eachother laugh about the rejection. Make fun of it and see how stupid 'rejection' really is!
However, it's not okay to become needy with the wingman. You have to detach yourself to later find out what system works for you! If you're not ready then it's okay as well! However, to detach do the reframing inside your mind. Think of your wingman dissing you (a good wingman won't though) and turning him into a ridiculous cartoon character.
Is rejection all in your head? Yes, and you're the creator that makes it up over past experiences.
"There is no such thing as a weaker sex-I mean rejection!"
Hope this helps alot! _________________ "Women Love What They Can't Have!"
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