Yesterday I had my first day in the field, so to speak. Not only did it go really badly, I don't feel like I learned much either. My intention was to approach sets of 1-2 women in the mall and the street, and use the opener where I ask them to tell me which perfume is the better one between the ones I have on each wrist. What I got was a lot of approach anxiety and two approaches where I just crashed. I think I need to revise both where and how I open, and i might also need to work with a partner to help me get "into it". I think the hardest part of learning something is the start.

I don't much like "meat market" clubs, but chilling at a place where they have a more relaxed SPAM is cool. Could anyone suggest a newbie friendly opener to help me get over my approach anxiety, and also what type of place to try to execute it in? Most places are cool with me, except for night clubs and the like.

If you need more info to answer my question, just say so.

Hey mate...I remember some months back I went shopping with this other mate of mine. We were both planning on buying perfumes for our mothers for mothers day. Well we went to a perfume shop where there are good looking women.

I didn't speak with any of the other customers but asked the girl working there something along the lines of "hey how are ya? I am looking for something nice for my mother and I was wondering if you could help me out?"

As she allowed me to sample some of the perfume I commented "this smells nice...what do you think?" Other lines were:

"What's your favourite perfume? Why?"
"Whats the most popular perfume out on the market?"

So I ended up buying the perfume for my mum and I did mention with a smile "hey I'd like to buy you something nice as well...which perfume would you like??" Of course she rejected it but it got her smiling and I am sure it made some sort of an impression.

But we were not there to 'pick up', just genuinely to get perfume but I am sure you could add in some small talk between those "What do you think of this one..." type questions.

See where I am coming from?

Thanks Joe. Do you feel like this way of approaching a woman could lead to you picking up her E-mail or phone number, or was it more of a thing you did to get more used to talking to women you don't know?

Do you guys think that starting out with women who "have to" talk to you is a good idea? I am talking about, for example, store employees or waitresses. It feels less like "the real deal", but might ease me into it so I can approach with less fear.

I think I need to revise where I want to approach them, as well as how I want to do it. If I can get a few decent encounters under my belt I might rid myself of some anxiety, which in turn will improve my game further. Overcoming this fear and uncertainty about where/how to approach seems difficult. Might want to get myself a wingman as well...

"Where to approach, and how" Any where!

I approached the cashier today, she looked 19 or so, very cute 7.5 or + but she was 17, said was in high school.


She had 3 others rining them up[not speaking english]
She said, I am sorry about that.

I opened and said

Me: nice neckless I have one too[points to mine], is that real curly hair?[negged]
Her: Blush oh thank you, no it isn't.
Me: Havn't I seen you up at x college?
Her: No I am still in HS
Me: thank you


I back off if they arn't 18.

Using the Havn't I seen you somewhere is just common chat, theres 6 billion people so it's not like we live in a small town of 1,000 people LOL...[/quote]


I should have said, oh thats okay, its your job, don't stress out over it.

Then opened.

If she was 18 I would have kept gaming her, she was my approach for today, and you should approach one a day when your out.

When checking out you should always look for a cashier who is someone you are interested in.

They don't put the "good looking" girls in the back, they are usually on the floors/cashier.


What's helped me is my clothing, I feel like a different person in them. Women get the impression that I have money, and there fore not a bum and could be someone interesting for her.



I learned now not to ask for her number if you see her constantly, like a place you go to everyweek. You gotta build rapport with those type of women IMO.

Women you meet once in a lifetime, you be confident, say something very intelligent/important and then say like, I gotta run but lets exchange numbers so we can chat more.

The key(IMO) is to make a conversation interesting and her interested in you, and leave it hanging. Then continue it later.

It's different methods for different places.

#1If a place I go to weekly/daily, I want to build rapport with a woman.
#2 If a place I will go once, in a while a year then I will make it very interesting, like the street PUA style, then continue it later with her #. I.E quick pick up time crunch 5 minitues

#2 usually won't work on #1, and #1 really won't work on #2 if your on time crunch.

I tried #2 on women at #1 places but it has always failed on me.

I am going to be testing some more things with #2 and #1, say something meaningful and go back the next week and talk again, leave her hanging.

These are just my experience and it differs for each guy.

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It is not AA that scares me or affects me anymore, its leading a conversation forward and keeping her interested. AA is nothing.