Hello, everyone!

What you now read is the word of a 20 year old guy whom is new at the art of pick up.

Short description of myself:
After being depressed for 3 years, and missing several opportunities to get a girl in the sack/a relationship, i started to look up some basic pick up. But it wasn't a serious attempt, so here i am again, ready to give this a real shot. Sometimes i get lucky at night clubs (this is were i usually "game"), but that is after some heavy drinking and this is something i want to get out of. When i'm sober i'm the most unsmoothest guy ever.

To the problem:

Girls often say that they find me cute, and i guess i look like a nice guy based on compliments. But after being depressed and raised with the belief that you should place all females on a pedestal have seriously wounded my confidence (and confidence is important, right?)
When i do manage to muster up the courage to approach i girl i find attractive it usually ends up with me saying hi and asking for her name.
After this i always run out of things to say if the girl isn't showing any signs of attraction the moment after i have made my "move", and it's embarrassing to just stand there and look like a guy who doesn't know what to do. If it goes a little further it becomes more like an interview, ex. "Where do you live", "What do you do on your spare time?" and so on. I really have NO clue what to do if the girl isn't giving me positive direct feedback.

The question:

How do i move on after i have made the opener? Don't say "just talk and act like you normally would talking to someone", because i need some clear explanation on how to do this.
Is the opener supposed to be a shortcut to a larger conversation, or is it just supposed to be a way of introducing yourself?

Thank you guys in advance, hoping for some great advice.

I take opener as a way to introduce myself. For me, it's not necessarily a bridge to the next topic. Although it could be sometimes. I wouldn't go as far as "interviewing" the person for the first time, unless of course you guys really hit it off. Sometimes even acting weird or making a fool of yourself can lead you to a number close.

Off topic maybe, but..

you say you're new to this? I take it as either little to no experience? What I suggest is just talk to random girls/woman about anything and everything. It could be a weird topic or whatever. This is so you can get comfortable and come up with ideas and maybe correct your way of approaching or even keeping a conversation. For ex, just come up to a girl and talk about The Walking Dead (TV Series). See if she likes the show or not. Mind you, most of them will think you're weird or whatnot, but that's ok. Being normal is such a square. You need to stand out from the rest of the guys who tries to get at her. Lol, I guess this is similar to what you didn't want to be posted.

Just keep sarging and you won't have this problem later on.

I have a little experience in picking up girls at clubs, but that is mainly because i'm drunk as h*ll which makes me relax a little bit, or that the girl just comes up to me and starts to dance.

The problem is that where i live (Sweden) many girls can be quite prude, and if you just walk up to a girl at random, she will most likely give ignore me, give me the bitch stare or just answer the question and walk away. This doesn't seem like something that will teach me to craft a good conversation, i'm afraid, more likely to wound my confidence, than to boost it.

If the girls are harder to get to socially, peacock them into wanting to talk to you. Wear something that they cant look away from. Then, while you make your approach, they will start their usual respond and walk routine, but will be so drawn to the article you are wearing that they cant help but ask. Then, formulate a story based on it, even something as cheesy as I lost a bet, and make it a crazy story to help warm them up with laughter. Or, try a different approach, one where they dont have a quick responce to, like the opener where you ask them to help you decide which name would be better for yours/your friends new pet. Give a few options, and then see what she says. Work on approaches first, and trying to get her to stay around a few extra minutes, and then work up from there.

And on the confidence issue, dont worry about what they say, because remember, you will probably see this one woman this one night, especially if she turns you down, but it is a learning experience. Rome wasnt built in a day. And also sticks and stones may break bones but names have never hurt. So if you get rejected, laugh and learn. Look at the approach, the opener used, and see how you can reword it or create a new one to keep the attention of the target. Adapt your game to fit your environment.

We all have been there (with the confiedence thing). Hell that is how we ALL got started. If we all didn't get fucked over in the past and/or have a hard time doing this, why would we learn how to do it?

No girl is unapproachable, if she is, move on to the next one. I am sure there are nice girls there who are still hot and will talk and "play your games." The good thing about this, is the prude ones will see this - you being the highlight of the place - and then THEY would want YOU to open them and they will fight for your attention since everyone is giving it to them.

What you are doing with your "interview" questions is what we call fluff, you can use it mid-game, but don't waste your time on these, they are boring like you said. Instead, talk about stories (don't brag, just talk). I like telling some girl that "hey you remind me of this/these girl(s) that I meet when I got flown out to Seattle a few months ago." etc. You want to DHV yourself a bit during this point, talking about your hobbies in a non-bragging manner.

You can also run ESP tricks, magic tricks, cold reading techniques, etc. on girls, they LOVE it. This will build the attraction you need to go into closing game, where you isolate the girl and go from there.

I would not do this drunk, I even still have a hard time getting over approach anxiety, but guess what? You won't die from talking to them, so just do it. You have to crash and burn before you are not scared of what might happen. Notice how with some liquid courage you can talk to them or dance with them... and you are still alive! Just realize that and say "fuck it he is right, I can do w/e I want" and have that mindset whenever you go anywhere.

There is a lot to learn and do imo - read the different approaches, as saying "hi, what's your name" is boring and won't get you far imo unless you are a really good looking guy or very great on stacking. Now, after that read the actual mid-game part and routines part of this forums. We have a lot of good suggestions.

I would also say read some books out there about PUA or watch YouTube videos / online videos of PUA gaming just to get a quicker understanding of it all and the different phases, etc.

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after years of management is retail environments i have a little input here.

When you are selling something, in this case yourself. Use what is in front of you.

when you are buying something, in this case trying to pick up a woman. Again, use what is in front of you. She is in front of you. Compliment her on something she is wearing, he hair or how cool her phone is. Buy her a drink talk to her friends about what you see. Pretend to be interested in something they are doing. hell you may find what they are doing is something you are interested in as well.

if you run out of things just come up with a "cool story bro" and tell them something about yourself.

Don't compliment a girl on something she is wearing... Why would you do that? Would you wear her shoes?

You could say something like "Those shoes are interesting. Where did you get them from?"

"Oh, I thought I saw them on clearance at JC Penny "

NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER buy a girl a drink. EVER.

And don't pretend to be interested in things her friends are doing... Have things that are interesting topics of conversation of your own.

Firstly i would like to thank you for your encouraging words and all your tips, this is exactly what i've been looking for.
All of these techniques seem quite complicated, do these really work? I looked up some ESP tricks and some cold reading, it seems to be something that takes plenty of time to do. If you go out to a nightclub most girls wont really want to sit down and talk with a guy they don't know just so he can read their palms and etc.
Do you have any tips on how to do this at nightclubs, or some stories how you yourself have used those techniques on "the field"?
Again, thank you for your encouraging words, they really helped!

Hey, I understand your situation with the girls. I will not say that you will give up instead pursue what you think will make you a winner for the girls. The right girl is waiting for you, someday you will find her.

For the girls that just walk away after your question, i suspect 1 of two things is happening. You're either visibly nervous or making such a huge deal over talking to them that it creeps them out and this gives you little value.

However, if you make it spontaneous, talk to them on the half turn with open, relaxed body language you will do fine. Try an ''opinion opener' as this encourages back and forth interaction, something without a definitive answer.

And remember, its just one chick, even if you dont pull her, your still in a better place than you were before you talked to her. You gained experience, and also increased your level of social proof in the club for the next target.

As a general rule, dont buy her a drink, as this lowers value. Especially not in Sweden, as you may need to get a mortgage before a round at the bar.

Clubs are difficult because the noise factor makes it impossible to communicate. Focus on body language:-unless the joint is really quiet, it is going to be at least 95% down to that whether you score. I find kiss closing is easier in clubs if you don't actually say anything-the only alternative is to yell directly into the girl's ear (not sexy). You have to restrict yourself to very simple, bland sentences. By avoiding verbal interaction altogether you have a major edge over every other guy in the club.

Don't be subtle, posture aggressively and sexually.

Here's what I do: position myself against a pillar or whatever with my chin jutting up in the air. Smile in a predatory way. Project arrogance. Doing this in the day will make the girl think you're a cock, at night it works very well. You will get female attention. Sometimes I don't have to do anything but you can beckon them over if they look a bit unsure. Reach straight behind the neck and kiss close instantly. If you are moving elsewhere just nod, or motion, unless it is absolutely essential.

If you must insist on talking to women do it in the line outside.

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