So I logged in yesterday and there were no fewer than three targets that were newly single. I couldn't believe my luck. None of them were on, so I took a crack at opening via messaging. Let me know what you guys think.

"So what happened with the guy? I don't mean to pry, but relationships always fascinate me. I hear about them disintegrating around me daily since it sounds like some wives/girlfriends can't resist temptation while their husbands/boyfriends are deployed. They'll ask me for advice and ignore it immediately. I've even been recruited as a Facebook spy a couple of times! "Try and hit on her to see if she flirts back!" People! I swear."

Sent this out to a couple of 'em and although it's a specific circumstance I think it can be useful.

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Only one thing could cure this: Dance Music.

...Props to you for giving it a shot mate, but it's a bit AFC. You're digging into an area that most people only discuss with close friends. Not only is it going to be tough for her to give you that info...she wants to discuss it with "friends" not potential dates.

If you get a response...from any of them...completely change the subject to something interesting/fun and something that will get YOU further down the road towards whatever sexual thing you want to do with her.

Had you said "So what happened with the guy? He didn't buy you enough roses on Valentines Day did he...I told him to get you 12 but he said 6 was plenty!"

That's...a little better. Still prying a bit, but you're keeping it light and not qualifying yourself, "I don't mean to pry..." "...I've been recruited as a facebook spy..." You've just said to her, "This is going to be weird" and "I always am single so friends make me do their shit work."

Long message, but you got me going. Last bit of advice. If you're going to try something for your first time, ease into it a bit. You don't want to use up all your single girls mate! Best of luck to you and let us know how you do.

Thanks for the input! I got a reply from one that didn't really offer much information so I already transitioned into something lighter before I came here. I'm just so much better in a chat format or in person where there's momentum. Even when I was younger I always used AIM or something and have never really had E-mail exchanges in social or professional ways.

The little anecdote really did happen though, which is the funny part. Soldiers get paranoid when they've been away from home for a while.

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Only one thing could cure this: Dance Music.