Heys!

I'm looking for some ideas to create a funny / humorous / sarcastic about me for my social network profile. I'm in a relationship, and I'm not interested in online dating at the moment.

For those who add me, probably already know me, and will know I'm taking the piss.

Here's an example, I've kind of dragged it out a little.

*I believe in taking care of myself and a balanced diet and rigorous exercise routine. I love going to the gym with the gang, especially doing curls by the squat rack, the 5 of us stand around the one bar just in case a spot is needed and encourage each other while one of us reps out the 15 sets of 21's. The girls are really into the guns ye know. In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.*

Just for shits and giggles really.

Any ideas?

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If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you think you'll lose, you've lost.
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