Ok so you get her to reply positively/agree to a date and then what? How do I get availability or tell/ask her where/when we should meet? (20yo virgin here)

I have surpassed my expectations on getting a few phone numbers from Tinder and than I screw it up because I don't know how to transition smoothly to finalising the date. It's really frustrating because I don't know if I am being overly desperate/pushy after a while or if they never had the intention of meeting in the first place.

For example:

-Blah blah blah - find out that she has very similar taste in movies as me:

Me:"If you are free some time we should go for a movie marathon "
Her: " I'm always up for a movie marathon haha"
Me: "Yeah? Well we'll need a lot of pizza too"
Her: "Pizza is always good. best combination (Y)"

At this point I tell her I'm going to sleep and ask for her phone number and she replies with it.

NEXT DAY:

Text her and get quick replies, usually replies quicker than I can (every 2-3 mins). Chit chat blah blah...

Me: "Hahaha, should I be scared for domestic violence from you? "
Her: "Haha absolutely not, I'm chill af as long as I am not taking photos"
Me: " Haha ok, well I'll keep your camera away when we go cinema than "
Her: " Ah so we're going to the cinemare are we? "
Me: " You see, I need to test the waters before committing to a marathon, I don't want to find out you eat all the popcorn or something"
Her: "Haha no I can pretty much promise you'll get 90% of the popcorn "
Me: " Yay awesome, when is a good time to go cinema in *her city* (close to where I live)"
Her: " Well I am super busy at the moment but usually Saturdays and Fridays are good"

At this point I got confused as to whether she meant saturdays and fridays are good for cinema or for her being available and also I replied without enough proof-reading and just generally being stupid.

Me: "Haha no worries, Friday is good for me so thats good. Finding it hard to pick a movie though. Any help?"


No reply.

Similar executions have happened 5 times in a short period of time now... Given how well some of the convos were (Assumed from the type of replies I get), I do wonder myself how bad some of my last msgs must come across lol.

Tinder is a self selecting group. The women on there want to meet new guys at the least and many want to get laid. Take more control of the situation. Tell them when you want to meet, and what you two are going to do. BTW the movies are not a good idea.

Just say:

"What time are you eating dinner tonight"

-she replies

"Okay lets meet up after that and do X"

-If she cannot meet up then you suggest tomorrow

That is a good strategy actually, I'll try something similar and post results.

As far as it comes to going to movies, its a terrible idea indeed but just because there was so much talk about films it seemed like a good place to go.

Yeah but you are watch something for 2 hours with little physical or verbal interaction.

Keys to setting up a date:

1. Is there is alcohol involved the chances of you getting to 1st 2nd 3rd base as well as a home-run are much higher

2. Pick an activity of or place that naturally allows for a lot of physical contact

3. If possible have the location of the date closer to either her place or your place

Agreed, my initial plan was to go see a movie and than suggest to go to a bar after but best just to avoid cinemas alltogether.

1. I am bit skeptical about alcohol on dates, I am not lightweight but even when I am not drunk I tend to say stuff without thinking, with even a bit of confidence from alcohol I lose all filters. Could be funny I guess

2. Any suggestions? Only things I can think of are bowling / mini golf etc.

3. I would feel more comfortable inviting girls over at mine rather but unfortunately I currently live in a "village" which means the longish drive home might be somewhat discouraging on first dates.


Anyway she actually replied today so I assume she must have gone to sleep yesterday, but after some more chit chat I tried again - using similar to what you posted earlier and so far no reply again. Tbf I don't have the time to chat to many people at once, so if a girl doesn't give me at least some indication of wanting to meet in person, I rather just skip and try with someone else...

Whats your view on double texting, especially after a while has passed? A girl gave me her number on tinder without even asking for it, but then I screwed up on text by pretty much saying the show she watches is shit (another brain dead reply ).

A lot of girls will be into you but scared to go on a date with a stranger. So you might have to push a bit. A lot of girls flake at the last minute too. Sucks, but it's part of the game. I agree that movies are a bad first date. I go for either a quiet bar or coffee shop. The best ones are the ones in the center of town near other stuff, so you can go for a walk with her to a second location right after the first.

You do need to take charge more. Women don't like indecisive men. Once she said Friday or Saturday was good, I would have said "great, how about XYZ coffee shop friday at 8 pm".

Other than that though, you had some great cocky/funny lines in the text conversation. "I don't want to find out you eat all the popcorn" was my favorite, I'm gonna remember that one.

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I don't make love. I fuck. Hard.