Well, i didnt think id need guidence in this respect but this comment came from this girl outta no where and im not sure how to take it lol. Just as a pre-story, i was gameing her a lil ways back, first on myspace, then she gave me her number, but planning dates and such never panned out. I knew she had a boyfriend, which she never mentioned to me. This is actually the chick months ago asked me how to handle breaking up blah blah blah and i responded "by going out with me". Got a positive response, not as positive as id have liked but not bad, then for whatever reason we kinda lost touch. I noticed she put up engagement pics so i sent a message heres what happened.


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: ME
Date: Mar 10, 2008 8:01 PM


Hey been a while. Congradulations on your engagement, i had no clue lol. You didnt say anything about being in a relationship.

Awsome for you, im so happy lol. Other then that how have you been?

Im doing well, just got back from Nashville about a week back and had a kickass time. Lately ive been sick but eh, im still doing well.

Catch ya later Sniffles!
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Mar 10, 2008 11:11 PM
hey ,
thanks. yea i have been with him a little more than a year and a half. i'm happy about it. i guess i didnt mention anything cause its still sinking it. lol. glad you have had fun in nashville. thats really cool. sucks you've been sick. a month ago i had the flu and it was terrible!! lately i havent been up to much but school and trying to find a job for when i graduate in 2 months. not very exciting lol. but this week is my spring break so its a little better...even though i still have tons of school stuff to do over break.. whats new with you?


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Then outta nowhere i get this message after not responding to her last message...

Mar 12, 2008 1:10 AM

truthfully my friend, it kinda sucsk cause im like the guy in the situation and he never ever wants to have sex and stuff so honestly i could be happier

The part that confuses me is she calls me "friend", false disqualifier? After which she takes it to a sexual frame telling me shes not being satisfied lol. Im just at a lose for how to take this. Thanks ttyl.

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Personally, I use the "my friend" expression a lot to people I know and don't know. Come to think of it I've even said it to women I was interested in with no intention of it being a false disqualifier. In my opinion, it seems like she is legitimately seeing you as a friend aka big brother to come talk to about her woes with her guy. Mainly because she's comfortable with you.

So we can respond two ways. We can be big brother and play Dr. Phil and talk about her partner and their sex life, OR we can go fishing like a PUA would. My suggested response is, "If you're not happy already, what is going to happen later? Have you thought about leaving him? I'm not judging you I just think you should be happy."

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Uhhh I dunno if anyone else saw it but I am swear she just asked you to have sex with her.
She is sexually deprieved! If he is not going to give her enough loving you can. I didn't say you should or shouldn't. I am not here to judge. I would depending on how good looking she is.

_________________
Fear it! Fuck it! Do It!

The Creator of the Facebook Poke Method!

Hesitation means Masturbation!

Definatly not trying to be Dr. Phil...im not her therapist and while i have known her a long time ive never been tossed into LJBF with her. I definatly have gotten strong IOIs most of all her not mentioning this guy to me.

She tried the therapist thing with me before by asking about how to handle breaking up with someone you care about...i responded with "You start going out with me "....hell ill post that...


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: melissa doll
Date: Dec 9, 2007 8:06 PM


whats the best way to move .. a break up when you're with someone a while?
lol
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----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: ME
Date: Dec 10, 2007 9:44 AM


You start goin out with me

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haha good response. have fun at work today. i'll miss you at the show tonight but my friend heather is able to go so i don't have to waste a ticket which is good. talk to you later.

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Things kinda died down after that, i dont think for related reasons, i was gameing another chick i liked more and stopped bothering with this one. In anycase yea i like your responses, i wasnt sure if i should mention the happiness thing or not. All in all im not too worried about it, ive got nothing to lose, figured with a resource such as this though i might as well get opinions. Thanks.

PS; woopie, yea i noticed that its what confuses me, a potentially false disqualifier then to a sexual frame...i most def would sleep with her, shes not over the top amazing but shes a sexy cute. thanks

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

i sent her this...ill post her response

Aw it sux to hear that. Im sure hes a great guy. He seems nice and im sure he takes good care of you. He probbly does things for you 'just because'. Id never be able to do that, id be a horrible boyfriend.

If you're not happy already, what is going to happen later? Have you thought about leaving him? I'm not judging you I just think you should be happy.

You must be one of those girls that has a really low sex drive. Definitely not my type. Hope that works out for you though. Good luck with the engagement.

You still owe me a drink btw, but I can't count on your word, since you didn't keep it before.

Catch ya later

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Smooth Ka, i like it. Cant wait to see what she says

_________________
success is my only mother fucking option, failure is not.

*cringe* I liked everything EXCEPT that part, which I think was really beta. One of the easiest ways to get a one way ticket to the friend zone is to talk to her about drama in her life and ESPECIALLY guy problems or relationship issues. It's always best to just to brush it off like you did the first time and then start a new topic/routine.
lol whoopie is so alpha it's awesome. You need to get your game down pat and go dethrone Matador.

-V

_________________

MatchbookMethod.com

Actually i like that phrase/part. It accomplishes a few things i wanted to do.

For one it points out the obvious. If your not happy why are you with the guy. Secondly it touches on the prior messages where she askes me how to breakup with him and i tell her by going out with me...if she mentions she tried to or wanted to leave him before, i tell her the solution is still the same. Third, im looking out for her best intrest. Im probably the only person who has the balls to ask if she simply thought of leaving him. Im hopeing it flips the 'protector of loved ones' switch.

Other then that yea, im really looking foreward to see what comes of this. I agree with woopie in a way, except for her 'friends' statement at the beginning, that could mean everything or nothing. It was either a false disqualifier, or a legit one...placed to either hide the blunt sexual nature of the message, or placed to counter it as to lead me down dr phil blvd. I picked the false disqualifier

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Heres the response...not exactly what i was hopeing for, guess she was looking for dr phil...

HER:
low sex drive? lol not so much. but yea a drink....hopefully when i get done school in 2 months cause thats all i have time for. it sucks but i'll be done forever

***************

So the only thing i can gather from this is that the prior message was a slip on her part, that the window of opurtunity was small if there at all. She was looking for a shoulder to cry on, not a way out.

Idk, her response isnt very intresting to me and i dunt feel like wasteing time on a lost cause. Anyone else see it differently?

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

I'm not trying to rain on your parade Ka, it's just the factual truth....if you talk to a girl about her relationship/guy problems you are volunteering yourself to the friend zone. Ask a PUA Guru and he will tell you the same thing. Tyler D's Boyfriend Destroying Routine is the only thing I've seen work, and it only works on young high school/college girls.

-V

_________________

MatchbookMethod.com