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Crypto,
Let's be serious. Would you advise that any woman, if she just "upped her game", could land Ryan Gosling, or Channing Tatum or George Clooney? That she shouldn't settle for her 6 boyfriend, even though she is a 6 and will NEVER be a 9? That the only reason she is settling for less than Ryan Gosling is a matter of "free will"? Of course not! You would be selling her a line of pure bullshit and setting her up for frustration and failure.
Fact is, only time I see women who are 9's with men who are 5's is when the man is very rich, very powerful, or very famous. Sure you can occasionally get a hot girl to stumble home with you if she's drunk enough and really pissed off at her alpha boyfriend - but that's not the same thing as choosing you from a group of 50 other guys online. Looks are LESS important to women, but not unimportant.
I do agree that every man can do more than they're doing, and can probably attract a higher level of woman than they think they can, but setting them up for failure by encouraging them to go after 9's and just face constant rejection is NOT GOOD ADVICE and does not build confidence or self-esteem, which is supposedly what this site is about.
And my 2cents - What's better? Getting laid by a 6 or 7, or getting played and rejected by a 9?
What's the real goal here?? To impress other men by landing a hot chick that's clearly out of your league in looks, or getting MORE attractive women to notice you, talk to you, go out with you, and fuck you?? That is what will build confidence and THAT is what women will eventually be attracted to.
You're coming from the belief that women are the trophy. Whos to say a woman wouldn't rather get laid by a 6 or 7 than be rejected by a 9? No one says you can go out and get a 9 overnight. This is self transformation, it isn't easy.
@Diva, that is not only what I am saying, but what I am living and working to better each day!
This statement makes me think you are the kind of person who would tell Buster Douglas "Don't get in the ring with Mike Tyson, you don't have a chance!" Every human sees something different in every situation. Your 10 my only be my 7!
In real life not everyone gets a fucking trophy, but if you give it your best then you know you did everything within your control to play the game.
Peace...
Crypto,
Excellent boxing analogy. Do you want to go into the ring and get the shit beat out of you again and again, or actually win a fight? Which one leads to increased confidence? Which one just leaves you battered and bruised but hey - at least you tried.
This post started with a guy who is frustrated by the fact that good looking guys are the only ones that get the attention of the hot girls online. What I'm trying to be realistic about is that in an online environment, where you can't easily show off personality, confidence, body language, humour, and other things besides looks, physical appearance usually wins the day.
Given this reality, I'm suggesting that it might be better for self-esteem to get some wins in the ring rather than get the shit kicked out of you over and over and become dejected.
It is a process, and I'm supporting the idea that success breeds success, and no guy can live off the crumbs of saying, "well I didn't get laid but at least I played a good game".
Fair?[/quote]
I see the point you are trying to make, and I will agree to disagree.
We tell guys to "Approach, approach, approach!" You will not get better at anything in your life if you are not willing to work for it (grades, sports, art, PU, etc...) If you are average looking and you can't pull girls that are a few levels above you then it is not your looks that are lacking, it is your inner/outer game. Yes looks are important in online game, but a couple of decent pictures will get you far!
My boxing analogy was to say that "Every boxer was an average guy at some point in their life, and they chose not to listen to the naysayers who said You can't do it".
Peace...
CHAT
