I think I'm going to give up online dating



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PostPosted: Sun Oct 21, 2012 3:30 pm 
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I used badoo and one other dating site. I got really, really low response. It just makes me pissed off and depressed. That's why I think I'm going to quit online dating.

I think I'm going to try IRL instead.

This is my profile on badoo: (can't post links yet. I will post the link further down in this thread)

Any ideas why my response is really low? Be honest please.

Most girls don't even click to view my profile so I think it's the picture they see of me in the message that is the problem. I just write "hi" or "hi, how are you?" but I don't think that's the problem to be honest.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 21, 2012 3:34 pm 
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hmm. weird. I have 5 posts but still can't post links.

I'll try this.

This is my profile on badoo: badoo dot com /0263933622/


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 21, 2012 6:32 pm 
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dude I'm no pro, but "hi" or "how are you" is not going to get you very far. for one it shows no imagination.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 21, 2012 6:53 pm 
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use PoF or OKC, don't use Badoo

Make sure your profile is good and you have some kind of attractive rap via email. Most online guys have shit profiles and no online game, which is probably your problem. Get some online guides from the PUA community to figure it out, don't try to reinvent the wheel yourself.

Link your profile for critiquing if your brave


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 21, 2012 7:26 pm 
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Quote:
dude I'm no pro, but "hi" or "how are you" is not going to get you very far. for one it shows no imagination.
Maybe you are right. I just messaged a girl "hi". She didn't reply but I saw that she had read the message. I then messaged her "pick a number between one and five". She replied "5". I said "correct. 5 means you're interested in me"

We're chatting now but I don't know if she's interested in me or not.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 21, 2012 7:30 pm 
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Quote:
use PoF or OKC, don't use Badoo

Make sure your profile is good and you have some kind of attractive rap via email. Most online guys have shit profiles and no online game, which is probably your problem. Get some online guides from the PUA community to figure it out, don't try to reinvent the wheel yourself.

Link your profile for critiquing if your brave
I tried to join PoF but it doesn't seem to work. Maybe it doesn't work in Sweden. I have registered for OKC but there's a very small number of girls from my area. I use a BS site called happypancake that is also free, that's what Swedish girls use mostly, apart from the paying sites.

I'll try to link to my profile again and see if it works this time.

http://badoo.com/0263933622/

What does "attractive rap via email" mean? Exchange of emails?


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2012 6:59 am 
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With that attitude you're gonna do just as shitty in real life as you are online.

"Oh girls didn't respond to me right away. Boo fucking hoo, I'm sad and depressed now and I'm gonna quit."

Does that sound like the type of guy a girl will WANT to respond to? I didn't get shit all for responses at first either, and I actually put in time and effort to message a lot more than "hi". Then I read a little. I changed my profile. I changed it again. I tried different messages. I spammed a lot of girls just to test the waters (hint: practice on ones outside you area). I changed shit again. And AGAIN.

I've send hundreds of messages and I'm still nowhere near perfect. Nowhere NEAR it. But I'm getting consistent responses and #s and closing a few dates with actually attractive girls. If I wanted to close with ok-ish girls too I'd be even better.

Get out and there and stop giving up at the tiniest resistance. Don't take it personally when it doesn't work. Its a game, have FUN with it. I just got done messaging 20 girls a vibrator joke. Some ignored me (meh). Some responded enthusiastically (great, time to talk). Some tried some snarky bitchy responses to put me down (hilarious!). The 3rd category just make me laugh now. I encourage you to try and get to the same point.

Just as an example:

Me: What's the difference between a man and a vibrator
Her: The vibrator gets the job done?
Instant shit test. I could have crumbled right here, a month ago I'd have been done
Me: *more jokes, long message*
Her: Thank you good to know
Another shit test cold response
Me: You're welcome, I'm glad we could share this moment
Her: Lmao I feel like we just had a bonding moment. Cherish it forever
Hey look she's coming around, I can now chit chat funny talk with her

Just have FUN with it. If you want more specific advice ask away.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2012 10:06 am 
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Quote:
Me: What's the difference between a man and a vibrator
Her: The vibrator gets the job done?
Instant shit test. I could have crumbled right here, a month ago I'd have been done
Shit test, or opportunity to boast about your sexual prowess?

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2012 3:16 pm 
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Quote:
With that attitude you're gonna do just as shitty in real life as you are online.

"Oh girls didn't respond to me right away. Boo fucking hoo, I'm sad and depressed now and I'm gonna quit."

Does that sound like the type of guy a girl will WANT to respond to? I didn't get shit all for responses at first either, and I actually put in time and effort to message a lot more than "hi". Then I read a little. I changed my profile. I changed it again. I tried different messages. I spammed a lot of girls just to test the waters (hint: practice on ones outside you area). I changed shit again. And AGAIN.

I've send hundreds of messages and I'm still nowhere near perfect. Nowhere NEAR it. But I'm getting consistent responses and #s and closing a few dates with actually attractive girls. If I wanted to close with ok-ish girls too I'd be even better.

Get out and there and stop giving up at the tiniest resistance. Don't take it personally when it doesn't work. Its a game, have FUN with it. I just got done messaging 20 girls a vibrator joke. Some ignored me (meh). Some responded enthusiastically (great, time to talk). Some tried some snarky bitchy responses to put me down (hilarious!). The 3rd category just make me laugh now. I encourage you to try and get to the same point.

Just as an example:

Me: What's the difference between a man and a vibrator
Her: The vibrator gets the job done?
Instant shit test. I could have crumbled right here, a month ago I'd have been done
Me: *more jokes, long message*
Her: Thank you good to know
Another shit test cold response
Me: You're welcome, I'm glad we could share this moment
Her: Lmao I feel like we just had a bonding moment. Cherish it forever
Hey look she's coming around, I can now chit chat funny talk with her

Just have FUN with it. If you want more specific advice ask away.
I don't appreciate your diminishing attitude. I didn't give up right away or at the tiniest resistance. I've been on and off online dating for 10 years. I've been using badoo quite consistently over the last year, sending probably thousands of messages, and changing my pictures and profile info a number of times. Thanks for the other part though.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2012 3:44 pm 
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Stulirevab don't get your feelings hurt so easily by a poster who is trying to help you, your never going to make it on the internet with that fragile attitude.

I wasn't aware you were in Sweden so use whatever sites which are good there. However, I will emphasis again, don't reinvent the wheel. Get some professional PUA online help, obviously what you have been doing the last 10 years isn't working and you need to change it. No one is going to post a complete online solution/gameplan for you.

I was like most guys , a complete interwebz flop before I went over a lot of material from experts and rewrote my profile and learned how to email correctly. Now for every 10 emails I send out I get 2 dates and 1 lay. I'm sure there are guys on this site with better results then that. I don't spam generic emails ever, bad game.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2012 8:06 pm 
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ai take on aboard what these guys are saying mate, besides you did ask for help so don't bite the hand that feeds ;)

I can't really look at your profile without signing up so I don't know what it says, but I doubt it's the pictures. I'm not a chick but you don't seem like an unattractive bloke. Is deffinetly your messages / openers that's the problem. Read about on here and pick out the sort of stuff you think that fits your personality. Don't take anything personally whether it's a chick on a dating site not replying or some bloke on a pick up forum. Neither really know you.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2012 10:09 pm 
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I just say your pictures and they are super boring.

Get a photo with you being social, get one with you being athletic, get one with you being fun.

You need to sell these girls on something, only the desperate ones are looking for super normal boring guy over the internet, they can get that guy anywhere


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 23, 2012 8:38 am 
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Quote:
I don't appreciate your diminishing attitude. I didn't give up right away or at the tiniest resistance. I've been on and off online dating for 10 years. I've been using badoo quite consistently over the last year, sending probably thousands of messages, and changing my pictures and profile info a number of times. Thanks for the other part though.
Just trying to get you to not quit dude. Your very title is about quitting, and with an attitude like that it will make its into your messages and the girls will sense it. Even online as well as offline, winning the battle inside your own head is most of the challenge.
Quote:
Shit test, or opportunity to boast about your sexual prowess?
Could have gone that route as well, I was just playing around with anything that came to mind testing stuff out and having fun. I've usually tried to steer away from directly bragging but that might be just me.

In any case, that conversation went on for another 30 min or so until I got tired of it and went to bed, it was pretty late. Oh and on that note, for anyone who hasn't encountered this, its much easier to keep the girl engaged in off-peak hours. It makes sense of course, but hell I'm just throwing it out there in case anyone hasn't though of it and decides to stay up til 1am and give it a shot.


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