So I've been messaging a young lady on OKC and have progressed to the point where she has now dropped a major shit test in my way. In the first line of my profile I state that I'm an acquired taste. Here's how the conversation has gone so far...


ME:
Hiya, you sound like you could be an interesting character. You had enough of the snow in Siberia, the sun was too much in Australia so you've settled for the glorious English weather instead.

I'm wondering if your cooking skills stretch any further than cabbage soup..

>my name<

HER:
Hi XXXX,
That's right - loving the English weather. Perfect middle ground between the other two places.
A bit early in the game to be questioning my cooking skills, no?
>her name<

ME:
Hi XXXX, too serious? Well, I'm kind of high maintenance. You do at least cook in stilettos, right? Haha...joking of course!

What kind of mischief were you up to this weekend?
(please don't say chopping down cabbage plants for lunch)

HER:
OBVIOUSLY i cook in stilettos. I was raised to be a good Russian girl!

Maybe I WAS chopping cabbages for the soup. In stilettos obviously.
What were you YOU up to?

ME: Venting my frustration in the square ring and also went to a film preview screening at the BFI.

Our jobs might overlap somewhat, I have to work with people of your job description. I'm curious as to which industry you work in..

HER: Square ring? Sounds fun and ominous What kind of venting do you do? And why were you frustrated?

Which film did you see?

Re work - Have been spending a lot of time in Energy (mostly exploration & production oil and gas). Have done a lot of financial services before as well. What do you do?

ME: Pugilism. Frustration, although quite painful at times, is a very positive and essential part of success.

I watched Killer Joe by William Friedkin. I must say I was a little underwhelmed after seeing the trailer it was not what I expected. The Q+A with the director after the film was great though.

I'm a mathematician and work as a marketing analyst, so I provide insight for strategists - mostly within the FMCG retail industry.

HER:
So tell me - why do you judge yourself to be 'an acquired taste'?


I feel like the balance of power has now really shifted in her favour and need a good response to DHV. Also, how long before suggesting to meet up and exchanging details?

any ideas?

Reply like this :

An acquired taste ? For it's true that while some culinary experiences can be had (almost) for free ... I am (unfortunately) exotic and very expensive ...

Nice one, I like it.

I find it difficult finding the right mindset to be good at coming up with quick witty responses to shit tests. Is this a natual ability or something that can be learned?

Se16.


1) Take the words.
2) Construct an image of it.
3) See where this image fits in situations/places in normal life.
4) See what else is surrounding this situation/place in normal life.
5) Add some over-the-top humor. (if possible)

How did she reply by the way ?

heh fun conservation so far.

"I'm curious as to which industry you work in.. "

This was a DLV btw. Can you see how it's rather submissive and not assertive? Generally avoid using "..." You should have wrote, "I'm curios, which industry do you work in?"

you don't have to answer her question if you don't want to

''I donno, what's your favourite color?''

Not only is that lame it's not congruent with his profile and is coming across as insecure due to avoiding such a question.

Ok, I always try not to ask a direct question and use 2 full stops (..) because it's a little ambiguous. It could indicate that I'm pondering something or that I just mis-typed and entered twice by mistake. Maybe you're right and I should be more direct.

Problem is, people don't think it's ambigious, they think it means your indecisive and inconfident.

sure, i see it now. thanks for the advice!

Ok, so I used the reply worded exactly as suggested above and it appears did not have the desired effect:

HER
Heh. Fair enough.

Is there a way this can be rescued?

Reply like this :

How to respond then ? Humor or Candor ? Let's try candor : We can do this verbal sparring all day, and still not get anywhere.

It's a jungle out there, and we are just gonna get lost sniping at one another. So let's meet at *set date, time, and place* for coffee.

In this jungle I wanna see if you're a Jane ... so that I can go all Tarzan ... and if you're not a Jane ... so that I may merely howl like Tarzan ...

You stay with coffee, and only coffee. If she tries to weasel something more expensive out of you, you tell her that's for the second date. Don't back down.

Success! (kind of)

HER
Heya,
Apologies - I was at a wedding in Spain this past weekend.
How about the next one?