Alright, I'm not so hot at this online jazz, but I've got a lot of natural cocky/funny/confident inner game. So I usually focus on transitioning girls from the web to phone/text game ASAP.

But, here's the deal: I would like some constructive criticism on my OKC profile, and in return, I'll show you the last 4 girls I opened. I should say that I have roughly an 90% initial response ratio. Almost every girl responds to my first message. Yes, some of my game is things you've already seen (with enough of a twist to be semi-original) but it doesn't mean it doesn't work for me. Criticism on the online game would be nice as well. I would like to apologize ahead of time: I didn't copy/paste the convos. I screenshot them, as I've already been busted by one girl a few weeks ago. She googled something and it led her back here.

Here's my profile: TheGamble (I can't post links for some reason)

And the gaming:

imgur DOT com/a/pwq17

Thanks guys, anything you've got I'll appreciate.

Looking good to me. It's strong on cocky/funny, and I liked the part about being short, pretty short myself. I've been taking a different approach though. I've been including little info and short, concise statements with the goal of being more mysterious. Let me know what you think.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/darkstar1731

What has been you success rate?

I think your profile is pretty spot on, as long as your inner game matches enough so that your messages appear to come from the same personality. I dig the bit about being super bad ass at being humble haha.
As far as being mysterious goes, I actually had a girl message me saying that she really enjoyed reading everything, but she still felt like she didn't know me from it. Then she expressed interest about me telling her more about myself.
I've noticed that everytime a girl opens me, they talk about something unique from the profile. They always bring up different details, so im pretty sure I have enough variety to snare a myriad of personality types, and I can say that your profile might benefit from more conversation starters.
As far as my success rate goes, every girl I've opened has at minimum, read it, and viewed my profile, but off-hand, I can only think of two girls that haven't responded. I don't shotgun this to everyone, but I have sent this out over 20 times. The opener is pretty similar to the Mirror opener posted here, but its different enough that nobody has called me out on it yet. Sometimes interest dies down after the opener, but that's usually due to me not giving a damn and having moved on to someone more interesting.

Hope this helps, and I'm welcome to any further critique anyone has.
Thanks,
Abrasive

EDIT:By the way, we have a 91% match, what's up brah?! Haha.

Goddammit, this site never tells me when I get a reply. You might be right, I've been on the fence about mysterious vs. more content. The other day Okcupid sent me an email saying I was one of the most attractive people on the site based of quiver and quickmatch, yet my reply rate is not that high and I would expect girls to be messaging me first a lot, so I'm not sure whats going on with that. 91%, I don't know man, if we ever both go gay, hit me up, but don't be trying those canned openers. Haha.

darkstar,

I really do like your profile. It's fun, witty, and kept me interested throughout the entire summary. In my opinion, and due to my nature, I think it could be a little more serious. I'm fairly new to the online game, so don't trust me on this one. What do you guys think of my profile? Since yesterday, upon making my profile, I've established eight views. Is this good? Do girls ever message the guys?

OKC: ocphotonurse

Thank you, it was more serious before, but I thought it was too serious. Where is the link to your profile? 8 views is higher then I get in a day but no where near what a girl gets. I learned from the david d. online dating program that new profiles and profiles that are recently updated are made more visible by the site, so frequent changes to profile=more views. It doesn't seem that girls message guys first very often. I've had 3 or 4 message me first and one girl IM me.