Been on this forum for a while now , learned alot about acting confident and lots of other stuff. I used to be very silent 2,5 years ago and used to stutter alot , have overcome most of these problems. Dont stutter anymore , used to talking to groups at work and it did help my career alot. Havent got trouble anymore talking to girls.

To overcome most of these problems , i went to kickboxing lessons to boost my confidence , was good at it fought a match and won it. This truly boosted my confidence. Got another job function , changed from kickboxing to fitness and gained 25 kg's in the gym. Went from a small wuss guy to a pretty big guy. People noticed ive changed alot.

But have to overcome one nasty problem , i'm not at work and just hanging out with some friends or at birthdays my mind just goes blank and i dont have anything to say. Usually standing there still like a frikkin statue.

Next thing what happens is my mind is thinking ; see your not great , more like boring. Kinda like collapsing , and i hate it. Dont have trouble with one on one conversations , they go well , but the group conversations just truly suck.

Im trying to remember most of the conversations , and playing them back in my mind and write some comments down. To sharpen my humor skills , been reading some books on this topic and watching lots of comedy's writing the best phrases down.

But it doesn't give the greatest results , hope that some has some good advice to overcome this problem. Im sure i can work this out , just need a push in the right direction.

Think about what they say rather then what you say , and the words will come out off your mouth like shit comes out of your ass.It's the same with 1-on-1 conversation.

I freshly learned this .

Do you feel nervous? Worried about the groups opinions on what you say? Is there people you are not fully confortable around in the group? Normally going blank is caused by your mind going into a panic mode. You are freezing up because something scares you in the situation. I am going out on a limb here, and I think it may have to do with you confidence in leading a group (through conversation) due to your past lack of confidence.

I would also take the above poster's advice and try to stop thinking about the fact that you are not talking, just listen and slowly get more confortable with group dynamics. And if you are freaking out about freezing up in situations, you will naturally freeze up. You need to get a positive mind state before entering them.

To me its sounds like a confidence problem from your past that you need to continue working on. I think it all can be resolved in confidence building and social practice.

Hey friend;

These vidoes help you

Keep conversation going
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6I26OKV16k

Anxiety
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IM6X3hBaiwI

More of both approach and conversation skills
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0ohkan_wpU

All the best dude

_________________
Nathan Griffin