Wall of text here we go. Lately i've noticed ive been the bottom of the chain in my group of friends. The teasing on me has become a lot more frequent and they usually don't have much to say to me if they arnt ripping into me with jokes. I guess I had been the easy target because of my old self such as cribbing and getting upset over little things and very paranoid. Also that I have moved high schools this year so I only see them on weekends and holidays off. The school I moved to is considered "posh" so I get a doing from that to.

Its not that I cant take a joke but I hate the way im just the target now. I feel left out of a lot of conversation as I am missing out on their events in school and inside jokes when if I ever try and get in on I get ripped on again. I try slam them back but I fear it won't be witty and when I actually do just that; anything I say is not deemed funny and I just get a worse slagging then the previous.

In my young school days I was bullied and was raised to be a lover not a fighter but I have broken out of that shell over last 2 years to some extent such as I am starting to play sports and gain a huge amount of confidence but to be honest my mates are really destroying that because for example : I would not be as sporty as them or that I am in a "posh" school. If I could just sort this out I am sure my confidence will soar and really help with social interactions and my overall game (which is not bad by any means).

Surely with your own group of friends you can get a bit of respect?

What should I do?
Cheers

I could have a long talk about self actualizing with you.

But, I'll just say, take it with a grain of salt.

Your in High school? You aren't going to see a majority of them afterward. Start identifying yourself with yourself. Not through your group.
Your coming at life from a different angle than alot of people. You've got love. Stay true to that.

it's very difficult to rise up an old groups hierarchy. But you gives a fuck. Love yourself and have fun.

there's a cliche quote "you can't learn to live, if you can't learn to laugh at yourself"
With that being said:

Use these situations as practice in that the more ball busting you take will help you deal with rejection. Ball busting or learning how to take a joke can take you far in developing a great sense of humor.

Don't be frustrated, because at the end of the day, you know deep down that this is the way guys talk to each other 95% of the time and that they really don't mean what they say. Showing your friends that you can be a good sport about being the butt of the majority of jokes helps in that you should have no problem dealing with being rejected by girls.

Don't over think this man, everyone struggles with this in some way. We're men, we don't like to have our ego's fucked with. So don't let it get to you. Develop thick skin through this and once you figure that out, talking to girls should be a no brainer. Just don't be as mean to them as your friends are to you.

Davidj sounds like a humanist XD

Anyways im guessing you were the one being ripped on from the first day you guys have been friends.

And lately its been much worse.

One thing about friends is they are your friends as long as you do not change because yltheir self esteem is established in this mini-group that you all have constructed amongst yourselves.

No disrespect but you are at the bottom of the heirarchy in their mindset. And i bet your ass they will fight to keep it that way because who wants to lose status.

My advice fo you is to establish a new group friends where you have better status and probably ditch this one eventually.

Real friends are supposed to enrich your life, provide you with as much unconditional positive regard as possible, be open and empathetic to your needs and it looks like you are getting none of those which is the reason you confidence is suffering.

In short, they are assholes and you need to get fvck out and tell them to screw themselves

_________________
Bow chika wow wow

You all make great points and I am going to take your advice on board with the last ditch option is to just get rid of them. They are a year ahead of me anyway so I wont see much of them when they are in college next year!

I've always been paranoid but I have been working on it and I have seen improvements and im learning the not give a toss attitude to have towards other peoples opinions of you. I'll keep doing my best to toughen up and I'll get out of this rut.

I am most likely just over thinking it anyway and need to vent!

Cheers for the replies lads.

Exactly, guys are right. I had your problem, I had two best friends who were constantly picking on me, I was fun to make fun of. Everyday, they would find something about me (shape of my nose, my sense of humor, they would call me fat), and then I had enough of it. I stood up, and confronted them.

I rubbed everything in their noses, how they look, how they act, and everything else that I could see on them which wasn't perfect. Next day in school I spread the word and started jokes about them, I called one lolipop, and I can't remember how I called the other.

Then, I drifted away from them, found a new friend and hang with him. Later, lolipop and my other 'best' friend started hanging around less, and I ended up hanging around with the lolipop, by choice.

As it turned out, we had a lot in common, we both wanted to go out and meet girls. Lolipop becamme and still is my best friend, he showed some really MAD skills out on the field, so we are still hanging around, and meeting girls...


BAsically, if you fight for yourself, you'll get respect. The smartest idea is, to ditch them, and find someone with who you'll grow, not just as a pua, but as a man and as a person. When you find that one guy, who you want to grow with, everything else will just fall in it's place, trust me... Good luck...