My plan of action: any suggestions welcomed



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PostPosted: Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:52 pm 
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I wouldn't say I have social anxiety in most situations. I can keep a conversation going with a customer, co-worker, friend of a friend, etc.

What I'm working on is street approach, being able to go up to a hottie and strike up a conversation, maybe even get her number and ask her out. Starting a conversation with someone who I have no real reason to need to talk to, basically. Unlike a co-worker, customer, etc.

So here is what I've been doing to get comfortable with talking to strangers on the street, feel free to include anything I should do and suggest taking things out of my routine.

1) Newbie Challenge = Say hi to everyone, but focus on being able to say hi to hot girls

2) Compliments = Being able to say to a girl that I like her dress, or that she's looking especially nice today, etc. Without sounding like a creeper, just a sincere compliment and then I make my way.

3) Approaching for conversation = Actually approaching a girl for more than just to say a quick hi or compliment, but rather to talk for a few minutes. Small talk if you will. I've broken it down to approaching with a question, or remarking on something she's doing. Example today I approached a girl who was carrying like 6 books and said "Need any help with that", she said no but you get the point.

4) Making the conversation about her = After opening, get her to start talking about herself instead of just exchanging facts or her reacting to my observations and opinions. Asking her questions about her or ask for her opinion basically.

5) Flirty conversation = Having the conversation steer from friendly conversation to her getting the picture that I want more from her than just to pass the time talking for a few minutes.

6) Number close = self explanatory


So far I've done the newbie challenge and with great success, I brush off people who don't say hi back and still manage to get several cute girls a day to say hi to me and smile. I just started compliments.. with an older woman (30s), said I liked the dress she had on it looked nice on her.

I figure the lower things on the list ease my way into making it up the list..for example I should feel confident about complimenting a girl and teasing a girl before I could make the conversation flirty. What do you think of my plan to fight my AA on the street?


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 21, 2011 7:45 am 
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I feel like it is a good plan of action. I would start off with females who might not be as intimidating to you so you can have some success.

You had mentioned you don't want to be taken as a creeper. This is a good thing but you will need to make sure you are become more aware of your boby language and non verbal ques. It's your non verbals that will put you into the creeper zone more than what it is you say.

I would not only practive what your doing but also watch other peopler and take notes (mental notes). See what other guys are doing in there interactions and take note of the way that the women respond. Ask yourself if you act like that or if oucan act more like that, depending on the outcome of the female.

It needs to be natural, smooth, and unthreatening. Many times a compliment can be threatning to a female. I personally try to stay away from them unless I'm alrady engaged in some type of conversation.

I do best at day game and online sarging. I'm on dating sights no FB stuff. I approach them completly different. When using day game approach I like to ask complete opinion questions. What do you think about....? After the question I might say thanks and then I bounce. I don't want to threaten the female. This doesn't mean I leave or avoid getting into deeper conversation I just don't do it imerdiatly. This will allow her to become comfortable with me the second time we speak where I will not be threatening that time around.

One good thing I did when I first started was I went to a clothing store where therw were extremly attractive females working. When they asked me what I needed. I said I'm looking for jeans. then I asked them they could help me out because I will be getting a pair of jeans and I want to know what your three favorite are. I will choose the pair I want. There was playful banter back and forth the whole time. We had find getting me some jeans. You need to direct them but no like they are just sales reps. To this day if I stop in she remembers me. I never made a move to try and close anything with her because she is a hired gun. She falls into, bartender, waitress, stripper catagory where the game becomes more challanging. I bertend on a side job and trust me. We are hired guns. Being directly in front of the public with any social skills get a lot of people interested in you. Try things as a flirting technique only. see how it feels, if you actually feel good enough that you had created some repor take those same skills out to the public. Just don't get caught thinking anything will happen with them. It won't they are paid to make you feel that way even if it's not a lot.

Hope that helps.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 21, 2011 4:11 pm 
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Yea I found myself wanting a little feedback on compliments, thanks for your input. I found it hard to compliment a girl without a) coming out sounding gay ( I love those shoes = gay statement lol) or b) coming off as a creeper.

The only way that a compliment worked and was non-threatening, as you say, is if it's a passing compliment and no more, you don't interact with them anymore. Like I said I past this lady with a pretty unique dress on and I said wow you look great in that dress, smiled, she said thank you, and I kept on walking.

When I'm flirting up a girl the compliment won't be that flattering or over the top (I'll steer away from complimenting her looks) but I want to feel comfortable, say grabbing her hand and saying wow I like this ring/armband etc etc.

I'm also adding practicing cocky and funny on the list. I'm gonna go around and say a smart ass statement to a girl whenever I get the opportunity, but smile and be funny about it and see how she responds.

I tried it the other day with a little success.. I was asking some girl for directions.. and she was hesitant about where it was, and I said "do you even know where you are right now? I hope I don't end up in the middle of nowhere" or something like that.. and she laughed and pulled out her phone to make sure on her gps.

Thanks for the input sreupert


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 21, 2011 4:43 pm 
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That is a good C/F statement. Practice make permanent! I often say the exact opposite of what they ment or twist their words around on them. This gets them flusterd and you can often add a sexuall conotation to it. Just don't do it too soon.


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