Don't have trouble getting a girl to talk to me, but...



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PostPosted: Thu Dec 23, 2010 6:02 pm 
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This is a repost of the thread I made in the Mid-Game section. I was advised that I would get better help in this section.
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I've known about pick up artists and all of that stuff for a while, but I've never invested enough time in it to really see if it is something I want to do.

Why haven't I? Probably because I've never really had much trouble getting girls to talk to me. I don't know what it is, but there are always a handful of girls that I know I could get with. But the seriously retarded problem? I blow it all of the time by having nothing to say, clamming up under pressure, and getting ridiculously nervous.

It's as if my body refuses to acknowledge that I am a sexual being and the fact that I know a girl wants me makes me act totally abnormal. Drinking helps diminish this problem a little bit, but I've had zero success so far with INTERESTED girls. This is a very serious problem. It's like I'm at this point, a little over a year since my last relationship, where just knowing a girl wants me is enough to satisfy me, pathetically. All of my natural game seems completely drained.

The straw that broke the camel's back for me was Monday night at the pool hall. It's me and a few buddies and some girls that we chill with sometimes. My one dude has something going on with one of the girls already, but I was tipped off that her friend has had an interest in me. He put it bluntly: "Yo, you know you could f*ck Ashley any time you wanted, right?". So with this on my mind, I set up a game where Ashley is playing on my team in a game of pool. I do horribly (I never play pool, I honestly just went to chill out and do something), but she doesn't seem to care. I try to talk to her but there is absolutely no chemistry. Nothing. She seems stiff in her responses as if she's not interested, though I did notice her body language was receptive to me. After the game ended, I just felt so awkward that I sat off to the side to talk to one of the other girls who was much more receptive. The other girl is really cute, too and I definitely wouldn't mind pursuing that. The girls end up having to leave early, the other girl says goodbye and smiles, Ashley doesn't even say a word to me as she leaves. I talked to my boy later and he was like "Oh, yeah, Ashley's mad weird...Caity (Ashley's friend) says you have to get her drunk for her to do anything."

While I guess it could be true that SHE was nervous, I find it hard to believe. She is a really cute girl. I feel like I just blew it again by having nothing to say.

The root of this problem may lie deeper within me. My last relationship jaded me and I see girls as nothing more than liars and fickle idiots. Instead, I want to see them more intimately. Part of my charm was that I believed in what I was saying to girls, but now I have absolutely no faith in them.

But I like having them around. I want to be smooth and charming and not give a fuck and talk to girls easily without ever feeling awkward.

I NEED HELP.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 03, 2011 12:16 pm 
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Your only problem is that you didn't continue talking to the cute, receptive girl.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 2:03 am 
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You lack the confidence. Try to practice again. At least make a habit and talk to a random girl one a day. That way you can reduce your AA little by little.

And most importantly. Don't think about failing because if you do the more AA you will build up inside yourself.

AND PLEASE CHANGE THAT MINDSET WHEN IT COMES TO WOMEN ....


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 2:07 am 
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You lack the confidence. Try to practice again. At least make a habit and talk to a random girl one a day. That way you can reduce your AA little by little.

And most importantly. Don't think about failing because if you do the more AA you will build up inside yourself.

AND PLEASE CHANGE THAT MINDSET WHEN IT COMES TO WOMEN ....


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 2:21 am 
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Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 5:46 am
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Location: Sunshine Coast, Australia
Quote:
You lack the confidence. Try to practice again. At least make a habit and talk to a random girl one a day. That way you can reduce your AA little by little.

And most importantly. Don't think about failing because if you do the more AA you will build up inside yourself.

AND PLEASE CHANGE THAT MINDSET WHEN IT COMES TO WOMEN ....
He does NOT lack confidence. Your just copying and pasting PUA "mantra's".

iwakeupearly, you opened ashley (funnily my ex was called ashley haha) then you got nowhere so you opened up another girl. That is showing confidence.

I would say you are doing well, but you need to learn how to stack your conversations. Seriously read into escalation techniques and KINO, KINO, KINO.

Next time your with ash, make sure its in a drinking environment. Get her to come out of her shell and your IN.

REMEMBER YOU ARE THE PRIZE. She is GAGGING for you, so act like it.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 11:06 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
You lack the confidence. Try to practice again. At least make a habit and talk to a random girl one a day. That way you can reduce your AA little by little.

And most importantly. Don't think about failing because if you do the more AA you will build up inside yourself.

AND PLEASE CHANGE THAT MINDSET WHEN IT COMES TO WOMEN ....
He does NOT lack confidence. Your just copying and pasting PUA "mantra's".

iwakeupearly, you opened ashley (funnily my ex was called ashley haha) then you got nowhere so you opened up another girl. That is showing confidence.

I would say you are doing well, but you need to learn how to stack your conversations. Seriously read into escalation techniques and KINO, KINO, KINO.

Next time your with ash, make sure its in a drinking environment. Get her to come out of her shell and your IN.

REMEMBER YOU ARE THE PRIZE. She is GAGGING for you, so act like it.
Youre right sry about that. Hmmm pretty funny that my last GF's name is also ashley. Coincidence? maybe not :)


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 2:34 pm 
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Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2008 3:42 am
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Say what you want to do (when you're alone with her) - then immediately disqualify it. ( Disclaimer: You should absolutely KNOW that the girl wants you when you do this)


If I'm with a girl who I know wants me sexually - or someone that I've already had sex with I like to whisper something like, "It's too bad our friends are here I just want bend you over and fuck you hard over the table - I mean - lets hangout and play backgammon (smile and honest laugh)" (Lead her to your house or whatever.)


It's important that you say this in a way that turns YOURSELF on - she will almost definitely feel it too. If you just say it without getting turned on yourself it may still turn her on - but not for long. You felt awkward instead of turned on with her - and that's probably exactly what she felt.



I've totally been there man - I'm sure you'll have awesome experiences with women and elsewhere in your life down the road.

-Bennn


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