I'm sure many of you can go along with me. When I'm around people I'm fairly comfortable with I am the life of the party. But as soon as I am by myself at the mall or wherever or talking to someone I just met or similar I just freeze up and never have anything to say. I am trying so hard to figure out what to do to get over this. It just seems like I tighten up and slur my words, which is killing my ability to meet people.
Thanks for all the info this site provides. It has definitely helped me out!
-Bandit-

Bandit welcome to the forum, and I'm glad the site helps you out with a lot of information. Now to help you get over this. First of I want to say I know exactly how you feel. When I'm out with my wings I'm on top of the world and can do no wrong. When I'm out sarging by myself it makes it harder not having that support group there. Honestly, the feelings are still there in the pit of my stomach most of the time. Two things I've done to get over it/more use to it.

#1 Self Centering Meditation. I know it sounds silly and that's what I thought when I first heard of it too. It's David DeAngelo's method for centering your mind. Here we go, read this then close your eyes breathe through your nose and out your mouth slowly and do it. "First off, I want you to close your eyes. I want you to imagine cutting the cord to your past. Everything that's happened to you in the past, it's gone the cord is cut. ---Now, I want you to image letting go of your future, all your anxieties, things you have to do, people you have to please, cut the cord let it go.---Also, I want you to let go of your present, all the things you are trying to do right now, let that go. Lastly, I want you to let go of your self image, who you think you are and what you think of yourself. Cut the cord and let it go." Notice how much better you feel! Heck, I feel better just writing it.

It only takes a minute and seriously helps me focus. Second, just keep getting out in the field and practicing. It will help suppress those feelings. Just stick to the 3 second rule and open the set. I see a set, 1-2-3-Go!

Good Luck and let us know how you progress!

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Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Yes bandit I have the same problem.Around people I know and I am comfortable I could probly pull anything off.But the second I leave that circle of comfort or whatever you want to call it,I choke everytime.For years I have gotten over this by drinking but that isnt the answer.
Luckily I found this site while in a local internet hot spot and have been trying some things with some success,I dont expect much because it is an army base and 99.9% of the women are married,they are under 18yrs.,or the are but ass ugly...but none the less Im slowly killing this shyness 1 lady at a time,while trying not to get killed by their husbands,Dad's,ect.

Jsmooth has an excelent answer like many others on this site and Im so releived by finding it.

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Ich leibe deutchland!!! but glad to finally be back home in Nashville!!