| The guys that have hard ships with women also tend to be the socially inclined, awkward, nerdy types, who wished that Pandora was real and that he was a Na'vi. Now Fun is here, to bring closure, to help you guys help yourself. Never forget this rule in life- 'that everything is dependant on certain stimuli to exist.'
If you are an awkward guy, than the circumstance of your situation, your past experiences and a multitude of other things have contributed to this. Awkwardness is not who you are, but instead what you have become. We all know this; if you went out and pulled a hot women, suddenely the fears gone, suddenely your the social king, you can approach anyone.
Now using this example we can see that you have set up in your minds this habit of placing women on an all mighty pedastal. So much so that your on a website, surrounded by guys just like you, who are trying to figure out how to overcome this problem. Listen to me when i say this- most of this community is an embarrassment, its a joke, it has hardly helped anyone, just an bunch of mental masterbation mixed with some absolute bullshit reason like- its hardwired! Two words- GAY GUYS.
Most guys here i can tell you don't even want to be some supposed 'god' with women. I was in a nightclub last night, the thought of going there every day of the week to game chicks is just depressing, even if i pulled every night, its still just picking up chicks. It'll never make you happy.
So considering this, and considering a previous point- how is it that a shy, socially awkward guy achieves a good positive life and actually takes something from this community? Well just like I said, your are the product of you past, your are the creation of your mind, your upbringing. So to get a good life you need to start looking at your future and placing positive experiences in the present (now). For instance going to the gym, you know tomorrow your muscles will be bigger, this will bring a smile on your face. And with women, listen to a women, give her your undivided intelligence (us men are very intelligent beings you know), than actually try and help her.
Check the date you joined this forum to your left, thats how long you've been here, what have you achieved? If its alot, than great! Don't pin me down as a egotistical joker, if you lead a better life because this community fair enough.
"Why do i get so nervous around women? And how do I get round this problem?"
Well the true answer to that question is: desire. Every heard the phrase desire is the route of all suffering? Its a buddhist idea, but its also true. Let me explain, you see, because you desire women you also exaggerate their status, in particular over your life. So, you see a hot women in a bar you get very nervous- even though you have never spoken or seen her before. Your nervous because you desire her straight away. All the best naturals will tell you this- your nervous because you think your desperate, and so you'll fuck anyone. "Your willing to settle for the dregs" said David X.
How to get around this? Two things, firstly your mind works by habit, so an effective method is to consistantly remind yourself of the humanity of anyone you get nervous around. And so a habit will be formed. For example, Brad Pitt, human first, celebrity second. What do I mean by remind yourself of their humanity? Basically everyones just like you, they need there heart to beat, they need people to talk to, they need food to eat, they need the sun to rise and for it to fall. We need alot! Secondly, honesty, how honest are you in life? That could be a good number to keep, everytime you lie, simply add a stroke. Some lies are good of course, but most are bad. If you have no interest in the black eyed peas, why are you talking to the girl at the bar about them? Why? You have no interest? What do you have to hide for? Why not tell her the honest truth- you think their rubbish? Why not? Why are you hiding? Follow what interests you!
Right I'm spent, and I have to go as well actually. I'm going off with a mate to watch some football. By the way Man Utd, are going to winning the premiership this season, so if your into gambling and all that. . .
PS: Feel free to add stuff if you want, like past experiences or whatever.
|
CHAT