| Hey there Gman949
I gotta say: part of being an alpha-male, a HV person, a naturally attractive man is being the leader in the conversation. "You can tell who is the Alpha male: he's the one who dominates the conversation." my own quotation, i guess.
If ur gonna get into a relationship, u can't just run routines on her, you gotta learn to conversate.
It's amazing how even I went from being the introvert of my every class to the extrovert everybody loves.
I'm still the same guy, I'm the man I was cause I was proud to be me, with strengths and weaknesses, I only learned to express myself in front of others. we all got things to say, and we're all alpha males. Me, you. it's in there u just gotta get it out.
I got the feeling that there are 2 major things holding you back:
1- not enough social skills
2- not enough confidence
When you try to get into a conversation, you find that you can't relate, you can't fit in or find anything to say that would be intesting to others, and in a 1 on 1 convo you run outta stuff to say! am I right?
It's cause u aint got enough confidence, and you probably don't look confident. I was at this party a few weeks ago and the "cool athlete guys" were talking to me and i didnt even know them. I had really nothing to say but "ooh, nice" and stuff like that, but I looked confident. I looked like I was "The Cool Guy". and I was, cause I believed in myself. I HAD CONFIDENCE
what you gotta do is practice you conversation skills
this is the structure of a basic conversation:
-ask people question, quick question & development questions.
-make jokes here and there (build up the energy level of your conversations)
-when they say something you can vaguely relate to, tell them a story of yours that relates.
You can be a great conversationalist without speaking much, you can be a great listener and people will appreciate & like you for that.
But to reach the next level, you gotta become more confident and become a leader of conversation. become the storyteller, no longer the guy on the side listening. get that light focused on YOU! people are atracted by the light and when u become the shiniing star of a conversation, you're that guy women want to know! But ur gonna need confidence for that. you're gonna have to stop doubting yourself, stop believing others are better, smarter, stronger, or anything else! It's all in you, I believed it and it became true.
Good luck man
-Lucky D
|