Question about group gatherings



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Hopeless Romantic
PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 8:20 pm 
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So I find that when I'm in a group of people that I can sometimes get quiet. I don't talk or try to put in my two cents. A lot of it has to do with not being able to jump in on the conversation. I always feel like someone gets ahead of me. Then, by the time I get a chance to speak, the comment I had is no longer relevant as the conversation has usually shifted to a new topic.

So my question is how do I get in on a conversation when I'm just being a passive listener? I'm assuming this has to do with feeling beta to everyone. Atleast a little bit.

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danieltx
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 8:38 pm 
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Open your mouth and say something. Give your opinion on whatever is being discussed. If a topic comes up that you know a lot about, then educate the folks on it. Just say something, since you're already hanging out with this group it's not like they're going to tell you to shut up or anything.
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Hopeless Romantic
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 4:33 am 
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Thanks for your advice. So you're saying to just basically start talking. Just put myself out there. I just find it hard because I always feel like someone else starts talking before I can even start. And I feel bad about interrupting people. Maybe its just something I need to get over.

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fsidontknow
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 7:38 am 
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dont feel bad about it, I have it all the time. if you notice someone listening just continue talking. you shouldnt feel bad when interrupting, the other should feel bad that he doesnt shut up when a alpha male(you) is talking. and honestly it happens all the time. Just dont be to much in your head thinking about what you are going to say just fing do it. doesnt matter if you say something stupid or embarrassing
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Hopeless Romantic
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 4:42 pm 
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dont feel bad about it, I have it all the time. if you notice someone listening just continue talking. you shouldnt feel bad when interrupting, the other should feel bad that he doesnt shut up when a alpha male(you) is talking. and honestly it happens all the time. Just dont be to much in your head thinking about what you are going to say just fing do it. doesnt matter if you say something stupid or embarrassing
Thanks. This makes a lot of sense.

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danieltx
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 8:34 pm 
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Don't feel bad about interupting someone or cutting them off to say something man. It's not like they'll never have a chance to say whatever it was again. Just sart talking with a commanding voice (not necessarily loud, but a voice that carries) with a confident tone and you'll be fine. It really is that easy.
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onato123
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 12:20 pm 
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What I do is agree or disagree with what is being said by shaking or nodding my head to get the persons whose talkings attention. What this does is basically makes it seem like I have something to add and they'll speed up whatever there saying. Just before they finish, I just in and say whatever the hells on my mind. Always makes the centre of attention which is great and isn't being rude by interupting people.
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Hopeless Romantic
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 1:02 am 
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What I do is agree or disagree with what is being said by shaking or nodding my head to get the persons whose talkings attention. What this does is basically makes it seem like I have something to add and they'll speed up whatever there saying. Just before they finish, I just in and say whatever the hells on my mind. Always makes the centre of attention which is great and isn't being rude by interupting people.
I like this idea. I probably just need to work on how fast I jut into a conversation

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