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SA, I like your strategy in the clubs, its a bit long but it sounds solid.
I would like to hear what you say after, I mean after you approach a girl, do you have a"tecnique" or you just go with the flow?
Every approach can be different, as every woman is different. Because of the situational aspect of this, It's hard to give you specific techniques.
But there is some rules you can follow. Based on my observations, I will usually open an approach with either humor, or a compliment. ( sort of breaking the ice)
An opening approach is merely, getting your foot in the door. It is important to engage your target. Trying to maintain a good flow of conversation can be difficult if it is loud. It's important to face your target full on, smiling in between words, (It's a great way to keep a mark intrigued) Maintaining eye contact is critical when working in a club setting. Try to keep your words, limited to 3-5 each time you reach in to talk. I find it more difficult for a woman to remember long sentences within a loud environment and can end up with her saying "WHAT" and forcing you to repeat yourself and often taking away the luster of your quick wit.
I would also suggest that every time you reach in to talk, that you try to escalate your body language, subtle touches as you reach in, starting at the lower arm then moving up wards to the shoulder area. Touching while you are moving in is a great way to pick up on her own unconscious body language. These subtle touches to the arm are friendly enough to not be taken as aggressive advances yet can have the same effect if she is interested. Based on her reactions ( your looking for no pauses as you touch her, continued eye contact from her.) if these signs are in place, it is her telling you she is interested and doesn't mind your touch.
IF you are getting positive responses from your brief back and forth banter. Keep it going, but continue to escalate with the contact. At some point you want her to be touching you, this is important before you attempt to bring in sexuality into the conversation. A trick i will use to reassure myself if the girl is interested, is at first I am usually bending down to talk in her ear. ( as I am 6 Ft) If I am getting positive signs, return touching. I will simply back off and stand tall after i say something. I am trying to see if she will in fact try to stand taller to talk to me, this is usually a sign of comfort as for her to reach my ear her body will be getting very close to mine, she will also have to place a hand on either my shoulder, hip or chest to avoid falling into me ( another sign of interest and comfort) especially on the chest. ( chest touch as she speaks to you is also an indication of sexual attraction)
If she is showing interest with quick responses, laughter, eye contact and touching. You have established your primary goals. It is now time to move in for the kill.
This is the ideal time to try to get the girl to move away from the spot you are in. Whats important about this is her willingness to move even if only 10 ft away, it is in fact showing her comfort and interest in you. But I do suggest you try to get her to another side of the bar ( asking her to go for a drink or somewhere else where you can hear each other better) while guiding her. I Find holding her hand to be very beneficial in establishing comfort. Always take the lead.
(Psychologically, holding hands to a woman can be an intimate action)
I will also sometimes get a girl to place her hand in my back pocket or get her to put a couple of fingers in my belt loop at the back of my pants, as I lead her to another place. As we are walking, i find this a good time to show my fun side, with some dancing as we walk ( hip movement is a good way to get reactions of sexual intent from her) usually cutting through a dance floor can be lots of fun, also showing your playful side.
At this point it's safe to say there is mutual interest, it is now time to create some sexual intrigue. But be careful, you still don't have the deal sealed. ( not even close) I am not big on public signs of affection as I may be returning to this club and dont want other potential PU's to see. So i will not start a make out session unless I am certain of a take home scenario. I like to "appear" to others as I am just being friendly with any girl I am spending time with, but within our encounter I am surely working it.
As we get to other location, this is when i will usually increase the sexual tension. A good sign of her acceptance is placing your hand on her hip as you talk to her. If she doesn't make a hesitant gesture or any reaction what so ever, it's a great sign.
At this time, any compliment or comment usually has a sexual undertone. Because comfort and mutual attraction is already set, I will now become some what challenging, i will keep it fun, but will be heavy on the sexual indications. Any friendly banter has now become intimate. Every exchange of words will have heavy touching and close contact.
This is the make it or break it time. ( i have observed a lot of guys messing up big time at the point, spending the too much extended time on a girl that is not going home with him) It is now time to discuss where this is going. I will usually ask her what her intentions are for the rest of the night. I will come right out and ask what she is doing after this bar, if she has obligations to her friends, if she can just leave whenever she likes, if she lives alone, from town...etc etc. And of course if she wants to hang out afterwards.
Her responses will dictate whether or not I will be spending more time with her or just secure the digits and move along.
If It is obvious that we are not continuing the encounter that night. I will tend to bring her somewhere, even more private to secure the digits and give her a nice kiss. ( Don't want other potential PU's to see me making out with a girl) The intention is always to get the one night stand, but in my experience, this is not as common as one would think, no matter how good your game is. That being said, once i know i am not getting her home. I will back off a little with the sexuality and secure another encounter, on another date.
Note: It is very important to know when to back off with your attempt to get her home. There is nothing wrong with being persistent but there is always a plateau and knowing when you have reached it can be instrumental to getting follow up sex. Being too pushy can often end up in your not getting a second encounter. ( this is commonly known as, the next day brush off) To avoid this situation it is wise to start to show your sweet side, be a gentleman.
This is the time I will usually find a way out. Make up some sort of reason why i have to get back to my friends but will be sure to show complete interest in hooking up again. ( keeping as many women on the hook as you can, will ensure you of consistent sex on your off days from the clubs)
I Like to have as many women on the go as possible, outside of the club without going insane (lol)
The time spent here would of been approximately 20-50 minutes, so even after all my pre-game observations, I should still have more then ample time for more approaches, due to my pre-game observations I can now find another mark that i have successfully read. ( somewhere far away from where she and her friends were hanging out.) i will usually walk her back to her friends, and say something like. " I really enjoyed getting to know her and I look forward to spending more time with her in the near future" ( to keep her intrigued, i will have usually already suggested me showing her my skills in cooking or massage. ( excellent tools for future encounters)
Common mistakes I have made in the past:
Spending too much time with a girl i was not taking home. (Reading the signs and knowing when to get out, are very important for your time management)
Heavy petting and making out in the club( if you are going to frequent the club, it is important to not be seen as a player, I am big on dancing so i tend to get a lot of women observing me, if they see me making out with a bunch of different chicks, it can hamper future attempts)
Knowing when an approach isn't working and not keeping it friendly and short ( by keeping a failed approach friendly, it allows you to bump into this girl again on another date. I have noticed over the years that some women like to be pursued, they may not give you the signs the first time you meet them but if you see them again as you frequent the club, being friendly can often result in future pick ups)
I strongly believe in my pre-game observations, they allow me to move around with an objective and a confident swagger. After assessing the environment thoroughly, It allows me to stay in my pick up mode with stealth and efficiency.
Keep your eyes peeled, look for the signs and move in with confidence.
CHAT
