I've been reading this forum for a few days, and copying out the posts that I found legit and useful. The reason is that it takes many hours to sift through the posts, and separate the good from the bad. None if this is mine, and the credit goes to the original posters like juice and phanagon and many others.. if you want to find who wrote each quote, just copy and paste a small part of the quote in the search and you will find who the quote belongs too... i'd appreciate if you find other quotes that seem legit to post them up.

I think you just don't know how to read the IOIs. They are subtle..... Its just very small movements towards you, walking next to you and deciding to "stop" and dance next to you "from some reason", dancing next to you and opening up to you for 0.5 of a second and then turning her back to you again..... I don't believe you never got these, it's just that you didn't notice it.

a little poke in the side will do the trick, obviously gently, and then hold out your arms and they take them you then pull them up to your shoulders which they then wrap around, you then put your hands on their lower back, eye contact, look at lips, back to eyes, then move in for the kiss close.

First off, I encourage you guys to be the first ones on the dancefloor why? Because it tells all the women in the venue that your having fun and your confident, some nights Im self-conscious but you have to just close your eyes and be in your own world.

I think what you need to do is go out and desensitize yourself first.

I think you are right that I need to desensitize myself, I'm still afraid of what other people might think.

My issue so far is i've been afraid to hip-check, butt-bump or whatever if I didn't get any EC with the target first.

Some girls just want to dance, give them what they want.

EC is more or less something that happens when Im first on the dancefloor, since your the first one out there.. your already bringing some attention to yourself... so people are looking to see if you can dance, even the guys. So, something I like doing and I usually catch women, Ill point to them and motion for them to come here... it works!

"Creepy" comes off mostly in the eyes and smile, and how you look at other people. Just check yourself in front of a mirror, find your best smile / look.

I'm explaining to them that they need to have the frame of a guy just enjoying the moment on the dancefloor and happen to see a girl they have interest in.

To initiate contact/chat with a girl on the dancefloor your being direct, but you cant do that with her friends there. If I see you on the dancefloor with your friends

is after delivering the opener is just having a normal conversation, i can never think of anything to say that isnt complete garbage and my wing man normally has to help me out.

after the opener then just ask... How does everyone know each other.

do you ever go up to girls and just start grinding? i go to dance clubs in a college town and most of the people are drunk and thats usually how the dancing is initiated is by just going up behind them and start grinding


its one way to initiate, but you have to beware that girls are gonna look at theyre friends before they accept you. Sometimes they already know who you are when you roll up behind them and start. Ive seen this happen a good amount of times.

Never approach with 2 dudes, unless you guys make it look like your just having fun

isolation would be the key, it always is,

I was doubting if the girls were in to me, or just thought I looked stupid and were having a laugh at my expense. I felt the signals were mixed, and I'm never sure if girls are making fun of me, or if they like me. If the girls come up to you, how rough do you have to be in dragging them to dance with you. I was afraid to be too aggressive, so I didn't try anything really.

I used to just walk up to girls that were dancing and start grinding on them, but when I talked to my 22 year old Cousin, she said girls hate that and that its a huge turn off. I have always wondered if just starting to dance with a girl is bad for many reasons, she migh thave a boyfriend, etc. But whats your take?

Also in a club many girls seem to booty dance by themselves, but with a lot of girls. If one of the girls dancing within 5 feet of you gets closer to you a few times, I say just jump on it.

Now another thing I have noticed is one or two girls (in a group of 3 or 4) that continue to stare at you off and on, from a little bit across the dance floor. Now when this happened to me I wasn't really dancing I was just chilling and the girls where like half dancing and half just hanging out over there. What would you do in that situation?

Girls will tend to dance closer to guy with most value on the dancefloor, have your eyes open and no when to strike. Sometimes just turn around and simple put your hand out, and if she complies then your in the game.

just note your not gonna find a girlfriend on the dancefloor but first and foremost make sure your having fun!

dont just grind up against them unless you see the signal.

and try to notice the girl across from you, for some reason .. thats the one that will dance with you first.

This resides into the normal approach of pick up, go over and make yourself known! Sometimes its good to just be curious and go over and see whats up and probably follow the guidelines of my first suggestion bro.

Dude! The girl knows thats you behind her unless you tragically turn into andy dick. When you start dancing with a girl, unless she is forward about where she wants to touch her, start kino'ing her arms and the sides of her body before you go for the butt, if you body dance for her, girls will normally spank you. For me at least, I know I can spank her myself when the situation is reversed. About power and value, she is giving you the value for backing up into you, now I would proceed to start the kino immediately, as I said above.

The problem is im finding a lot of girls will fuck around and play games, after a kiss, girls will either stop dancing and go back to their friends, often bragging, or gradually they will get bored and get some form of buyers remorse... so how do u handle this? do u extract her off the df and then k-close? a lot of girls will be reluctant to leave her friends though, especially in a 2/3 set...
as i said i can dance and a lot of girls see it as a challenge to dance and kiss me, sometimes i feel like im some damn trophy. u ever have that problem and how u handle it?

Over time they got comfortable with my presence, and with time you will be able to calibrate it perfectly.

I started the same also, you have to force yourself to be social

Women are meant to be loved... not understood.

Gunwitch reads like a step by step manual on how to get charged with rape.

It's about being indirect at first, then isolating her and becoming aggressive. If she starts to resist you gotta "make the ho say no". It's sneaky and misogynistic and comes from the mind of a creepy looking dude who shot a girl in the face.

Girls VERY MUCH code to each other. They also "join sets" (a few unrelated girl sets will join together) to protect themselves when there is some lunatic / creep proxing them.

f it's a mega club with 500 people then yea, you can move around and nobody know but in a normal club, if you get the creep look 2-3 times - you are done for the night guaranteed. Girls see this shit from a mile. Open a set and get rejected - no other girl who saw it will open to you. ("something must be wrong with him" "if he is not good enough for her, he is not good enough for me")

You don't have to shout over music, the mind set changes from "I want to have fun" to "Hmmm, who do I want to go home with", people are being social and usually getting late night food, and it adds some pressure to run X number of sets in that 1:30am to 2:45am window.

Social proof is king... if you're in a club with 7-8 people mixed girls and guys together - you can practically go around and collect numbers from girls without even talking with them. They will assume you're all cool guys (bcz of the girls) and would like to know you.


But there is no better feeling than being 100% sober and still being able to approach... I can do this now after years of chickening out, it makes me feel like superman.

Get nothing but water at the club and learn how to dance(Just basics). No one is drinking on the dance floor, there's tons of targets and finally tap water is free. That's what I do anyway

tap water is better .. alcohol only makes you tired and dehydrated .. it smells horrible as well.

try to imagine a lavender cotton scent coming out of your mouth and how wonderfull it smells ... this is probably what you smell like if you don't do alcohol.

1 or 2 beers isn't wrong ... doing it every night is not such a good idea - culmulative effect of stacking bad habits over extended periods of time.

if you cannot keep your hands off alcohol there is work to be done ... you either care what other people think of you subconciously ( other people drink - cultural conditioning ). having no discipline is just a symptom of a psychological issue or it can be you are resisting uncomfortability....

You're dancing in spot X and move a few feet away, and some girl comes to spot X and takes up your space. That's an IOI from her. Stupid I know but I guarantee it's valid.

DHV on the dancefloor - if you dance NOT in the dancefloor but in the bar area, or some other area where other people don't normally dance - it's a "I don't give a fuck" DHV and girls will notice you. Again, stupid but not I make the rules.

It can also be a "I have no social intelligence" DLV if you don't do it right.

NEVER go into the dancefloor and start opening sets immediately. This is so fucking key... always dance and have fun for at least 10 minutes. Start talking with other guys.

Wait for AI.

Girls will dance with you only if they want to, it's not like forcing a convo by being funny and making them intrigued and opening them up. It's either on or off and they make the decision.

So just stay in one place and wait for girls to pass by and then one of them will tap her friend on the back or pull her back which means "STAY HERE I LIKE THIS GUY / THESE GUYS" and suddenly they are dancing next to you, or walk over next to your target and hope that once she notices you she will AI you.

If girls come over and dance next to you, throwing their ass at you, throwing their hair around - they are approach inviting you.

From that moment you have NO MORE THAN 2 MINUTES TO OPEN them or they will leave. But don't jump on them either - wait 30 seconds and then move in slowly two steps forward and one back and two forward and one back, not too direct.

You can go direct if you're both high energy and there is a "it's on" vibe and in that case just throw your hand at her, she will grab it, twirl her, pull her forward to you, put her arm on your shoulder, move hair with your hand, move her chin up, kiss close in 2 minutes. If at any point she resists - stop, wait two minutes and try again.

Then take her hand and isolate and game her, unless it's a total makeout and in that case push/pull, pull her hair, kiss, push, pull, bite her lips, push, grab her ass, do this for 20 minutes and then tell her you want to show her your stamp collection, grab her by the arm and leave the venue.

Be careful when you open sets without an AI. If you try to open a set on the dancefloor and get rejected - more or less every set in that area / every girl that saw it will be burned for the night. This is what they are thinking: "something must be wrong with him" "if he is not good enough for her, he is not good enough for me", "if I dance with this guy after that girl rejected him, I'll look like a loser"

(of course that for very drunk girls nothing really matters, we're not talking about them)

For very noisy clubs - this is the only method I figured... if anybody has something else let me know.

The spot x is borderline-girl will dance or move to a spot that is less crowded specially if they do not want to dance with anyone.
So if you move away from a spot now it's free space that she can dance at.

And in regards to dancing if you can move it's a plus no matter what. If you can't well stick with the two step.


To anyone reading this, I would suggest the best way to get attention is to focus on looking as though you don't care what anyone else in the club thinks.. Enjoy your wings company and make it appear as though the party is where you two are at, if you can't dance well, keep it simple! Also, I find dancefloor game easiest as it's pretty much completely non-verbal and it doesn't take long to notice the signals girls give.

the pick up SPAM comes after 12.30 but then usually more male competition..

Quite frankly once you realize what pick up is about or more the key/core parts of it and realize majority of the stuff out there is junk or fluff you find you don't really need PUA theories and what have you.

We are all reformed nerds trying to learn a skill we should have developed years ago naturally but we didn't

As I said: Most of the game is inner game. Canned material isn't going to help you if you genuinely don't believe in yourself.

Here is what I suggest.... go out and do it with a friend, and do the whole thing as a GAME, just the two of you fooling around having fun with each other and other people. This is how it should be done anyway... doing it with a wing can make it more fun and less serious (it SHOULD be fun and not serious!)

Don't be a sucker for every brand new theory with a fancy name. Dr.Heartbeats- Ninja Laserpulse Stealth Technology, or something like that. It is crap, it is recycled or it is just plain false. I know the world is changing constantly, so some techniques worked back in the days. They won't work nowadays. Why? Because they became so popular and wellknown, chances are a girl just rejected a guy before you using that very technique. This will be the faith of every technique. Techniques are not important. It is the underlying fundament that you should get. And those won't change. And could be written on max. 2 pages. But why would it? If you get it, you won't lose it.

Forget about these silly abbreviations. Forget about these guru's. Improving your social skills should have given you a newfound confidence on which you can build castles. Besides you are a unique person, if anyone can lead you to a solid 'game' it is YOU. Try, fail, learn and enjoy.

And more important. Life is too beautiful to focus too much on this little aspect. Devoting your time to PU makes you less and less interesting. Spending time in perfectioning your DHV stories, while in the mean time you could really experience cool things, about which you may CHOOSE to tell some people. Develop yourself, enjoy life. As a SIDE effect, girls will be interested in you. But it's a consequence not a goal. Nor an endpoint. Being a PUA is really ridiculous and sad. Being a developed man, with his own interests, lifestory, friends and stories isn't.

So the PUA community has it's place in life, if you need it. But only for a 'start-up', and only for a very limited time. Get confident and then leave this whole PU thing behind.

More girl IOI's / AI - when a girl is dancing with her friend next to you and TURNS HER BACK to the friend - she is basically "leaving the friend alone" and signaling you to come over and start dancing with her. When a girl does this you will have only a few seconds to move in. A girl would NEVER turn her back to her friend with no reason and will not do this for more than a few seconds.

IOD's are easy to read - they girl code to each other NO with their eyes (left/right movement), or with the entire head left/right, or will cross their arms or do "no" with their finger, or just throw their neck sharply from side to side once or twice.

They are NOT coding you. The girl being hit on is coding her FRIEND that she is not interested so the friend will know to grab the targets hand and move her away from you. What they also do sometimes is that the two (or more) girls will put their arms around each other to form a tight circle that you can't go into..... again, they're showing you that they are not interested. What I like to do in this case is mirror them and throw my arms around my wing... they then realize that you are socially intelligent and usually start laughing and it can even open up the set.

When you move on to a target and they are not showing any IOD - it is an IOI. So in this case - lack of IOD is an IOI. It means you can move forward... you are "on probation" they didn't make a decision yet.

Sometimes a girl will cock block and shut you down from your target even that the target IS interested... I see this all the time. This often happens when your target is drunk and the friend isn't and the friend wants to "protect" her friend from doing something "wrong" (protect my ass.... it's usually just jealousy, but sometimes it's legit)

small clubs / bars with a small dance area, where if you open one set and get rejected every or most girls will see it.

Like I said before be confident w/ every advance like you said females no when your not sure about what your doing with them.


1) If she exposes her neck to you thats a good sign
2) If she grabs your hand and places it on her hip
3) When she throws her head back onto your shoulder
its too loud and you look dumb if you have to repeat yourself, everything has to be done with body language and EC.

-I start grinding, and then when i feel things are heating up I kind of pull back and just smile at her and act like a friend(i know sounds gay, but i just don't want to come across like a creep) and then i try and get into it again but i feel like the chemistry is lost

When you pull back and smile, for some reason I think your trying to create a romantic moment, and thats not what a girl wants right now. You probably give off a weird vibe also, which is the reason why you cant up her temperature anymore.

Dont ruin the vibe if you got something good going on the dancefloor, read some of the previous post I made and see if that answers your questions.

Getting in with a group of girls is still tough but DF game is 90% Body language you have to convey that your just having fun and not after anything until later. Dont ever dance with your target first unless she initiates the contact and even more so.. you dance with her for 30secs and move to her friends.. and work the group. Your routine is fine, but your mindset isnt.. seems like you tense up, and your not being loose before you engage the group.

Just step up
behind her and smile and rub your peck on her shoulder once gently. DO NOT
TOUCH ANY PART OF HER BODY WITH YOURS. Girls love a guys with balls, I mean
it. She will look behind at you then look back at her friends for approval.
Stay clam. She will now do one of three things, back into you, step forward,
or nothing. If she steps forward, turn right around its over, look some
where else. If she does nothing try again, be careful she might be a bitch.
If she gets mad it is her fault, you just wanted to see if she'd like to
dance she could have been courtious and moved away or said no. But this one
backed into you. Your chances of a but grind from just about any girl are
about 50% Just ease into her and have a good time. After about three songs
of hard griding it is time to get go for broke. Spin her around and grind
away, but she might not want to do a front grind. If she doesn't, at the end
of the song thank her get, her name, and move on. This can come in handy
later like a street or parking lot PU. But you got the fount grind. VERY
IMPORTANT!!! If you are grinding with a girl it is your main goal to protect
her, try as hard as you can to keep other people from bumping into her. Put
out an arm or move both of you so you are the one getting bumped. I love the
look on girls faces when you do this, they eat it up. After another two
songs it is time for the kiss. Start by getting lots of eye contact, if she
not looking at you sorry no kiss for you. But she is, start touching her
face with yours, forhead to forehead nose to nose. Go in a couple of times
for a kiss but turn away at the last second. And then go for it! But DON'T
shove your tonge down her througt. Take it easy big boy. Do this a few
times and then stop, unless she keeps it going. When I get this far I
usually stick with the chick untill one of us has to go. At that point thank
her for the night and say something like, "I would like see you again." Even
if you didn't get the kiss still # close. If she gives you a number one
thing girls love is if you memorize it, untill she is out of sight and then
right it down, it makes you look smart. I don't ever try to pull a girls off
the dance floor, Why! Why do you need to? Your grinding, maybe kissing what
more do you want!

Remember not ever set is going to be receptive to you but they will proximity themselves around you...

I have tried just walking up to a girl (with open spot on left or right shoulder side) and while standing shoulder to shoulder say, "You feelin it?!" while pretending to be trying to catch the beat of the song and picking up speed to catch up to hers....She usually says something like, "yep" and then it's on!.

But I preffer to stay off the dance floor. There is something about that place that seems evil. Grabbing a girl just because you can.

If you see a girl dancing by herself, a good way to start dancing with her is to motion her to grab your hand like you're going to twirl her and move her towards you. Remember to be dancing as well, kinda like swaying side to side kinda

Yes, it is very competitive. So
wear your best club clothes, you might want to invest a little bit of money
in clothes just for clubing. Never ask for a dance, they always say no for
some reason. Just so you know the girls that come up to you and dance lots
of times are the girls with asshole boy friends but still # close just in
case. I usually make one to two passes on the dance floor per hour. One
thing to look for is girls that you have seen dancing with different guys.
If I don't get a dance I get off the dance floor. You look like a looser if
you are dancing around trying to get girls to dance with you.

What you are looking for a group of
girls together or one by herself. The one by her self is easy just dance up
to her with a open gesture and motion that you would like to dance if she
doesn't she in most cases will look away.

One bad reaction I got was with one girl she turned around after I hip bumped her amd said, "What the fuck are you doing", I had the look of suprise on me face and so did her friends..they actually liked me. I just talked to them after that happened... it was an intense situation the fact this girl was such a bitch to turn and yell at me.. good thing is most of the time only people within a few feet can hear it. It didnt phase my mood, at all because rejection is normal on the dancefloor..
----> one girl yelled in terror cause she did not see me and i came out of nowhere for her, she just turned around and saw me staring at her and screamed like
she is in the movie Scream 4 and a bus is about to run her over.. she apologized for it right after ward, but i felt bad that i elicited such a scared reaction from
a girl. that is why i hate approaching at bars and night clubs.

what worked for me in the dance floor once a girl gives you the go and she hugs you while you dance... all you do is bite her neck and go for the kiss...

Its my personal preference to not drink and dance, how can u write a good FR w/o being so hungover. Anyway.. to each his own I guess.

walk up to a girl and ask her to dance, which is usuaully a direct, do you wanna dance? I think this is a bad idea?

Usually I get rejected which really puts me down especially if the girl is really hot. I dunno what to do, what do you guys think would be the best thing to do in this kind of situation at these kind of parties where 50 people are say on a small compact dance floor. The problem more is, im 18, I go to these parties and most people are 16-18 and don't have any kind of experience in dancing, alot of the girls are like I can't dance and stuff along those lines so are scared to dance.

rubbing/ brushing (more appropriate) you Pectoral Muscle on her shulder..... its ur chest (tit xD) brushed against her shoulder.

Address the whole set, I usually start with the phatty to disarm the hotter girls! It works, ive done DF for about a year... and you have to be heavily calibrated and know how to work the group. But, Ill be real with you, sometimes the set could be already warm if you had been dancing and having a good time they want you to come over. What I use most of the time, is EC and a butt bump.. the butt bump usually works on girls that are already dancing... cold approaching DF sets could be tough as long your not depending your night on it.

Be very careful of starting LTRs out of a danceclub. I'm not saying don't...just be careful. Personal nightmares...personal nightmares.

How do you combat when two girls are dancing face to face and only looking to each others eyes? You see them everywhere and you know they are only doing it for attention as they never seem to be having fun. I've tried numerous things such as grabbing one of their hands and doing a cheesy ballroom spin but it never seems to work. I noticed you said tap their shoulder a few times but this seems kinda random if their not giving anyone EC and just doing their own thing

but to add, i go clubbing regularly and i've noticed that once you're on the dance floor dancing with a girl, other girls will notice and become much less reluctant to dancing with you. i like to move around and dance with a lot of girls and it becomes easier with each one i dance with

The key is congruence, remember that females are very observant man. I tap on the shoulder because its congruent with my personality, in order for it to be apart of yours you have to practice it abit til your comfortable with doing it. When two girls are dancing with each other you can do one of two things.. and something I like to do now, like i said is my "Butt bump" Or I just dance to the side of them until one looks over and smiles and I can see it from the side of my head...Remember girls will move somewhere else if they dont like you. The ballroom spin works when your making greetings or engaging another girl to dance.. but like I said to Gem the key to good dancefloor game is energy, congruence and please smile for petesake!

The thing is, i really do enjoying dancing for the sake of dancing, not just for meeting girls. Often i get into a state where i am having such fun dancing i cant be bothered with girls and it is these times when i seem to get the most interest from girls on the dancefloor. They can see which guys are there for a good time and which ones are there to leech onto every girl they see.

Now my problem like many is turning interest into results. I am a nice guy at heart and don't feel comfortable grinding with a girl i dont know in plain view of everyone even if she's up for it. I have girls pinching my ass on the dancefloor, backing right into me and i just freeze !

I got a pretty nasty response, and they moved the circle. Then I sat back and chilled and watched, usually girls want to dance with theyre friends and with that many in a loud club you will only be able to address the ones nearest you...

So, I hipped checked one, or the fatty, Id go for the ugliest girl in the group...or the most moderate attractive one. Hip check her, dance with her... and make sure she is facing her friends... because she is gonna girl code them for approval.. you cant tell because the others will look at her face. Go for compliance, usually with the hands, then id spin her and make sure I end up in the middle of the circle.

I was trying the hip check on a girl that was in a group of 5 girls. She looked at me like wth was I doing, girl coded her friends. At which point I extended my hand to another girl in the group and she just waved at me. I left at that point trying to keep my esteem intact.

After about 5 songs of dancing bounce her outside the DF for a drink or air..

Curiously, some women started to get near me and even one HB started to dance in front of me, making some indirect kino and the such. I didnt know how to capitalize on that though.

Ive learned that proximity, could possibly tell whether a girl is trying to dance with you or not. Sometimes, if they are interested they'll make theyre butt rub against yours. Then you should play along and see what happens.

Even if a group of girls, come dance right next to you its a sign, one of them likes you. U just need to have the balls to open up and engage. Proximity and how hard theyre dancing are key..

Okay, couple of times at clubs women will dance and pull away and back away, do not chase ever ever(shit testing), if you lost her you lost her, but do not chase ever, let her come back to you, or just leave....When she starts talking i do not care how loud the club is do not lean in, keep your head straight or slightly up at all times... Also do not be a dancing monkey, i see a bunch of excellent/awesome dancers getting all the attention, but never kclose, fclosee, dancing monkeys... Do not walk around the club like you are lost...

do not compete for a dance, specially when other guys want your target dance, you are the prize, remember to get a girl you must be willing to lose a girl, if this happens either turn her in a way to block the amog, or if is too early in the interaction let them have her, and dance like nothing happened, keep neutral, she most likely diss the guy and come back to you...

Another more common situation I find myself in isl this always happens with women I already am acquaintances with:

Me: I'm going x, I really wanted to try x for a while, you can tag along if you want.
Woman: That sounds great, I'd love to go!

Notice how she agreed, but still is making me do all the work.

Me: I'm going x time.
Woman: Busy

Then the whole guessing game starts again, like I mentioned earlier, if I guess wrong more than twice, she won't respond back. I have a real life example for you guys if you want to critique me.

Me: It's been a while (girls name), have you been doing well?

Her: Hiii!!! Its definietely been a lonnggg while haha. The year has been pretty crazy with its ups and downs, but lately I have been doing well How have you been?

Me: Great, got back from school, so I've been recharging. I've been getting bored lately so I've been trying all sorts of crazy stuff, yoga, salsa, everything it seems.

You should come with me sometime for lunch to add to the interesting things I'm doing this summer.

Her: haha sounds good! yeah.. i've kind of been recharging when I can. I'm starting up summer quarter next week... so that'll be a little less relaxing.

Me: Sad times... but I'm guessing you are doing it to finish up faster, right? I'm jealous, I cannot wait to finish college next year.

I'm going to Jamba Juice this weekend actually, I have intense urge for a starburst flavored smoothie. You can tag long if you like; I was planning for Sat. around 1, but I'll think about delaying it if you let me know the next time you are free.

Her: Yeah... kinda to finish faster I guess. more so so that I don't fall behind!
I'm actually busy all day saturday... sorry! but maybe sometime next week?

Me: I think I can do that. Didn't you say school starts for you next week? When do you get off?

Her: Yeah, but I only have class Monday, Wednesday, Thursday

Me:Tuesday sound good, same time?

Her:gahh.. haha I forgot, not tuesday.. i have to work

Me: lol, when are you free next weekend then?



-As you can see, the moment she again said she was busy, I knew I was royally screwed. I continued to push to hang out, because I knew what was about to happen, but of course, when I try another time, I don't get a response.

She will probably never contact me back. I will have to message her again like a month from now to get her to talk to me again. This isn't a woman I picked up. It's an old friend from high school, yet I'm being treated like this. I really don't know what to do any more, this happens every time I set up a Day 2. They'll even want to hang out, but if I magically can't guess when they are free, they all of a sudden lose all interest. Yes, I am being needy by pushing after the first "I'm busy", but what in the heck am I supposed to do?

I can ask her out now, or if she says she's busy, give her a week or a month then try again, but the response is always the same

SOCIAL DANCING (non club) GOOD PARTNERING: http://socialdance.stanford.edu/syllabi/partnering.html


this is short and has low views, but pay attention how he first twirls the girl and tests what level of dancer she is and does not do stuff that is above her level.











if you are doing social dancing and not club dancing, then do not try any pick up stuff on your dance partners. asking a girl on a date is considered bad manners and you have to be pretty smooth to play it right. girls talk, and pretty soon you will get labeled as that guy that asks all the girls out. BUT you are allowed to flirt shamelessly when you social dance. i've told women i dance with when they asked me why i came social dancing i told them "originally, i came to meet women, but i know better" and they replied "oh really? this place is full of single women and if they hear you came to meet women, i bet they will be shaking their boobs in your face" another girl i danced with i said "i get a lot o pleasure out of dancing with you. i am attracted to you" she seemed to like that and then i invited her out. it did not work out, but still, if you dont ask every woman you dance with and do it right, you can get away with it. but best not be labeled a sketchy guy and not try it unless the woman clearly likes you.

also, if you are dancing at a nightclub, you will get sweaty. girls dont like touching a sweaty guy. bring a towel to wipe yourself with, you can wear a white shirt underneath your collared shirt to soak up the sweat and also you can bring an extra shirt to change into.

also, wear shoes that have slippery soles. this will make turning easier and improve your dancing. dancing shoes have leather soles and you could literally slide on the floor. you cannot wear dancing shoes in a night club because the floor is dirty and will ruin them in no time, but i find that wearing dress shoes, especially the ones that are worn out is much better than wearing shoes with rubber that grips to the floor. you wanna be able to slide your feet on the floor. if the shoes have a strong rubber grip to the floor, then you will have to either really push with your muscles or pick your feet up off the floor and put them down. it does not look as sleak.

A bunch of none sense!!!!!!

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Very long, but very useful. Thanks.

all these quotes were taken out of context. they make sense in my head because i read the original threads and know what they talk about, but for someone just reading them, it would not make much sense probably.

i wanna add one more thing.

i went out to a mostly empty night club on a tuesday night. two girls in their late twenties were sitting having drinks at the lounge. then they stood up and started dancing behind me within two steps. i wondered if they wanted me to dance with them or if they would be offended or scared off by me. i turned to them and danced facing them so that we made a circle or a triangle of three. one girl smiled, the other looked at the ground. i faced the one that smiled and did the john travolta dance move playfully and she smiled. but i kept dancing by myself and was not sure if i should twirl her or if should continue in their circle. then a short black guy joined our circle and slowly, smoothly tried to dance with the girls. they sort of danced with him, but moved away. i did not wanna compete against the black guy because i dont want to make any enemies and dont wanna get stabbed on my way home by a jealous guy. later on, the black guy came up to me (he was nice) and said, "the girl was not sure if you were dancing by yourself or if you were dancing with her. you were not sending her clear signals that you wanted to dance with her." or if you are dancing in the circle, make it clear you are dancing in their circle alone and not trying to start with her. i get stuck in this middle zone where i face the girl but dance by myself. i finally chose the taller girl and started dancing with her. she went back to sit and text and i came up to her and said "can i borrow you for a dance" she smiled and said sure and squuezed my hand like she was excited, but once we started dancing she would come closer to me like she wanted to grind, but when i started grinding on her she backed away. i offered her my hands, and tried to dance with her, but she was moving way, and i was moving the other, and it was awkward as we both were not sure how we were dancing and she backed away. we tried dancing with our hands together, but her hand would slip from mine so i could not even twirl her. now question is: how do you dance with a girl who moves on her own and does not wait to follow your rythm and lead? how do you dance with a girl who does not have tension and lock in her hands? i can dance on my own, but with a girl, i cannot process the music, my moves, and how to lead and adjust to her backleading me and read the signals fast enough and i get lost. i guess my plan now is to learn to take dance classes and learn to lead a girl who is not an experienced dancer in a clear and strong way. that's not what you should do, you should also adjust to whatever she does and go along with any changes to the dancing that she makes - if she goes left, you lead her left. i can adjust, i just cannot lead strong. maybe i am just to shy to lead strong? i should try this with my female friends in social dancing - lead them strong and not let them lead me. i'm wondering, should i tell my female dancer friends about this problem and ask them if they would bear with me while i experiment with stronger leading? or should i just try the stronger leading without asking?

so to add to the advice above: make it clear that you want to dance with the girl by your body language - face her, offer her your hand, twirl her, smile, whatever. don't let her wonder if you are dancing by yourself or with her. but if you are dancing on your own, don't face the girls and look like you are not sure if you want to dance with them.

OMG!

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[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRLEDSA4afo[/youtube]

Nothing agains afc Adams(who i like and respect a lot), but UNFORTUNATELY, 5 guys per girl at the buying time at the club, in that video there are more girls than guys, and i do not see anybody there making out, or taking a girl home..!!!!!!!

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I agree! It looked like the girls were dying to dance with anyone - they are dancing so far apart from each other, an elephant could barge in there and start dancing with them. Usually, these girls would be huddled shoulder to shoulder and AFC circled around them grinding up from behind. The way he pulled the girl into him forcefully looks AFC, I prefer to give a signal to come closer and have her move closer to body contact on her own will without force.

I want to know the name of the dance where her foot is between his and they are leaning away from each other.

Yeah I gotta agree with this

k two movies come to mind when i do dance foor game, of what it is an it isn't, dirty dancing/saturday night fever, i am not talking about the dancing, i am talking about my style and the feelings people and the girl should have when dancing with you, look at the similarities, and the way both guys act, pua/alpha/sensual/sexual... That is my style with modern dances etc:




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8f4ejOIo5U



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZCtgFmQ ... re=related

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After reading all this I posted on dance floor game, I finally approached (thanks skills!) an asian girl who was giving me IOIs. We danced very close together for a while and when I left she took my number and called me, i called her the next day and she picked up (though she won't call back now.) So this stuff works for me now, what I was doing wrong before that I am not doing any more now is WAIT UNTIL MIDNIGHT (GRINDING TIME WHEN EVERYONE STARTS GRINDING) and then APPROACH A GIRL WHO IS/WAS GIVING YOU IOIs. I see a lot of fools approach girls before midnight and get rejected, then approach another girl after that thinking they can get a fresh start. But there is not such thing in a small night club where girls girl code each other that no dont dance with him. The key is not to approach until the grinding time. Then after I did not approach and did not get rejected publicly because I did not approach, I found the girl who was dancing in front of me flicking her hair and ass into my face with her friend, who had gotten bored and gave up trying to catch my attention and left, i found them and hip bumped the girl who was closer to me originally. They wanted to do the sandwich but cause i looked uncomfortable or just gave off a boring vibe or just AFC i dunno they started but gave up right away. still danced with the first girl 2-3 times and she chased me on my way out of the night club cause she wanted me to ask her for her number. but yeah girls wont dance with you unless they see other girls dance with guys cause girls dont wanna be the first one to start dancing or grinding with a guy when nobody else is doing it cause she dont wanna be loser/slut in the night club and she feels bad to get raped on the dance floor like that. but when she sees other girls dance and/or grind with guys, this gives her permission and also she gets jealous and feels bad that she is not dancing with a guy and also she is more drunk.

mpuapua you are too much focus on grinding, and every other word is grinding...i do agree with you that there is a time were girls are more willing to be open witch is usually about midnight, which i did cover in previous posts. focus more on being the cool, sexy, alpha, guy, make them have a lot of fun dancing with you and TURN THEM ON while dancing in a way that does not look is planned, you need close in the dancefloor, makeout/kino a lot of touching...stop focusing so much on grinding that is afc. your goal is to take the girl home somehow on the same night, a number is a waste of time unless heavy escalation, makeout, isolation(comfort/conversation in isolation)...The goal is not to grind, the goal is for the girl to want to go home with you or do you in the car.

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