| The last six months I’ve been working on taking my cold reading to a new level. It may not be everyone’s style, though if you are interested, read on.
Some useful ways in which I use cold reading
a) As an opener
b) As a lead in to NLP patterns and/or hypnosis
c) A vehicle for interesting and flowing conversation
d) A quick method to create comfort and rapport
e) Being fricken psychic
The dangers/mistakes I have encountered
I think I got a bit arrogant for my own good, thinking I could read people too much. This leads to assumptions which can hinder your game. For example on a day 2 in London a couple of weeks ago I thought Camilla was a virgin and had very little experience with guys, and so wasn’t that interested in her. I was very wrong, which prevented me from closing when I should have.
TECHNIQUES IN THE METHOD
It’s all about compounding techniques to give you the highest possible chance of being correct.
It’s not what you say, it’s what she hears
To begin with, it’s useful to build compliance. Compliance for me is also the cornerstone of successful hypnosis. It’s a bit like a compliment – a compliment will go down well if the girl is already attracted to you. Similarly, your cold read will more likely be accepted (regardless of how accurate it really is) if she already has a level of compliance with you. So start with small hoops/vague reads and build a level of rapport first.
Using reliable methods to build compliance
So I use some methods all the time that I am quite good at to build compliance first, so that the harder cold reads are more likely to come off. (Ever noticed the cube seems to work better if the girl is already into you a bit?)
One example taken from NLP is the type of words the girl uses can be used as a give away to what representational system she uses. That is, is she primarily a visual/auditory/kinaesthetic/semantic person. This is a simplification but can lead to great cold reads, especially for patterning purposes: “You have a very vivid imagination, don’t you” or “You’re a very visual person, aren’t you”. She might say things like “Yeah I see” or “Yeah I hear you” or “Yeah I feel you”. That’s a stark comparison but you get the idea.
More compliance
There is no point starting a cold read if she is in a negative state. Remember, girls’ decisions are state-dependent; change her mood not her mind. So get her in a resourceful state before beginning.
Starting vague
There have been numerous experiments done in attempts to foil psychic readers by giving a generic read to many different people, and finding that all those people said it was astonishingly accurate. So vague comments that people really take to heart are useful. One really good one is “You keep a lot bottled up inside at times.”
Going Sherlock Holmes on her
Now we’re beginning to stack. Open your eyes, I mean really open your eyes. Before you even come up to the girl, what can you deduce about her? Is there a milk stain on her t-shirt suggesting she ate cereal for breakfast or drinks milk a lot? What does that tell you? If you go to her house or pass her car, there is a whole wealth of things you can use. Etc.
Use of proxy questions
One of the best methods I use is to ask a question that presupposes a different answer. For example if I ask her about her childhood, she might respond negatively. This may presuppose a lot of things, but it could be for instance, something wrong with her parents. You could ask a second proxy question to narrow this down.
Timing
If you used the method above and the proxy was quite obvious, you can do the cold read say 10-20 mins later when she’s forgotten about it. Then she will wonder how the hell you knew that she had a bad relationship with her parents. This can be taken further. For example at the beginning of a night you might overhear her friend call her by her full name. Then later in the night you could “guess” her surname (obviously not getting it right instantly, that’d be too obvious).
Using people
Which leads nicely onto the next technique – if she has friends around, use them! Ask them proxy questions about her, or ask them straight out about her! This is valuable information to use for your target. Information is power.
Stacking with statistics & demographics
This requires some level of dedication, but there are certain statistics that can really come in handy. It’s useful, for instance, to know statistics for the area you are in for girls around the age you are hitting on. So, what proportion of people who go to uni x do a y-related course? From this you could cold read her “So you are more of an artsy person right?” Psychological research is very useful for this, one I use often is research on birth order effects. Although the field is still somewhat of a grey area, the second child for instance, if born fairly close after the first one is likely to have an opposite personality (although this manifests in different ways). It’s also quite easy to guess how many siblings the girl has and what order she is in the birth chain.
Clever use of language
When you give a read you are not so sure about, increase your chances by the words you use. For instance, “A part of you likes to really open up to people once you get to know them”. By saying ‘a part of you’ you increase your chances massively. Another example is by appending “at times”. A part of us does anything at times!
Analysing body language
A picture tells a thousand words. If you were to ask about her childhood (using the example above), and she responds negatively, she might look up and to your right. This is more likely to suggest she is remembering (visualising) an experience(s). So she might have had a bad childhood experience. If she looks more down, to the right perhaps, then this is more likely to mean her childhood in general was bad (for a period, perhaps). You can use this by saying "Did you have a bad experience during your childhood?" (You may not want to elicit such negative states haha).
Riding the wave
Once you get good, you can use cold reading as magicians/mentalists do. They will often say vague things and watch closely for reactions in the subject. If she nods (probably unconsciously), then get more specific on that thread. If you get negative body language, change subject or move on. Example: “At times you just want to give up (eyebrows furrow) but you are very strong willed and rarely let this trouble you (now she is nodding, or she unfolds her arms), so you are a very dedicated and strong willed person when you want to be, is that correct?”
Summary
There is, as always, more to it, but this might wet your appetite. It's of course not necessary for pickup, but a fun skill to learn in and useful in many walks of life, particularly when you can understand how powerful it can be when it enriches your interactions and conversations with people.
P.S.
Not sure if this is the right section in the forum. But cold reading isn't really NLP/hypnotic seduction so...
I wrote this for my own group, thought it might be useful here too.
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CHAT
