Difference between interest and attraction



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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 7:46 am 
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I would like to state the difference between a woman showing you indications of interest and a woman actually being attracted to you.

Some women give you IOI's when you come into the club... when you enter a room full of people, when you walk by them (sometimes even if they're with they boyfriends)...

I have found that women that give a lot of IOI's are usually looking for someone, they want either a new guy or they want a guy cause they're single. And they give off these signals uncounciously... that's why it's good to pay attention to this stuff without making it compulsory to have IOI's before you approach.

Attraction really kicks in when we approach, when we do something, when we show up in front of her and state what we want... that's when the real attraction is there...

Someone can be interesting (and receive IOI's) just because he attracted attention with something(big myster hat, tall dark and handsome, big powerful smile, confident body language, etc) but if that person doesn't approach he stops being attractive...

Because women want a man for her, a man that chooses her .

I think it's important to state that difference because most guys get their ego boasted when they see IOI's and they don't do anything waiting for an even clearer sign of "attraction" because they confuse interest (having cautght attention) with attraction...

Having caught attention is only the first part of the approach and you don't need IOI's to do that... just go there and say... Excuse-me... and shut up until you have strong eye contact from her and then say what you want from her...

All the best!
Sorin.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 9:47 am 
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I think it's important to state that difference because most guys get their ego boasted when they see IOI's and they don't do anything waiting for an even clearer sign of "attraction" because they confuse interest (having cautght attention) with attraction...
Yeah i'm so guilty of doing nothing even though I know I can. You keep waiting for more interest, and then more until and then suddenly it's too late and they're gone.

If you get a feeling a girl is into you just go for it. Trust your instincts.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 10:01 am 
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I'd disagree heavily, whether a man approaches or not doesn't change his attractiveness, if some absoloute hunk passes a chick in the street, she finds him hot, regardless of whether he said hi or not.

In fact... have you heard the "womens golden rule"?

You can build attraction in set per say, but if you HAVE attraction, you wont lose it becuase you didn't approach.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 4:07 pm 
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Now we are talking about different things here...

A woman can be INDIFFERENT to you. A bit better is CURIOUS. I would say that INTERESTED can also be non sexual but ATTRACTED is always... well attraction.
However, it can be difficult to see that the attraction is there unless you increase the buying temperature. I agree that interest can turn into attraction and most likely will if you play well enough.

Buying temperature is a great thing to use. It is like the little box you have between your CD player and the loudspeakers, it boosts the signal and makes it easier to hear what they are singing in the song. This is how it works with buying temperature as well, everything becomes clearer, everything is easier to see. And they will feel the attraction stronger as well.

Gotta write a new post on buying temperature...

Ezo


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 4:19 pm 
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i also sometimes find myself waiting for IOI's or atleast eye contact before i approach. i think it is a bad habit and i am working at breaking it. any AFC can talk to a hb who has shown strong IOI's.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 7:12 pm 
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Unless you dont approach for a long time (i am talking regularly seeing her and not approaching) then yes she may lose attraction.
Attraction can be there to the start, she is attracted to you and that is why she is showing interest, she is interested in you escalating (opening, touching, kissing etc) because of that attraction.
Attraction is like a scale, lets say 1-100. At 1, she hates you. 100, she would actually be throwing herself at you. 50 = indifference.
For the sake of argument in a club or when a women is "looking" for a guy, your average joe is going to come in at about 60-65. Everything you then do (or dont do) will either increase her attraction to you or decrease it. Different things will effect it in different extremes.

Just a perspective.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 8:14 pm 
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I don't really get why people wait for or look out for IOI's when they should just be spending their time causing them instead. They aren't that important anyway. You can tell roughly when they like you by calibration and when they're ready for closing, without having to descry individual signs.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 10:52 am 
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It is not really that people are looking for IOIs... People push for IOIs by running material until they get 3 IOIs. Thats when they know that they can stop and can go into A3. At least if they follow the M3.
IOIs are reading bodylanguage. One IOI is not enough, it could just be a coincidence, it is like a word being said, does not have to mean anything. 3 IOIs form a sentence...

Ezo


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 13, 2009 2:19 am 
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I agree. You have to approach as soon as possible.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 23, 2009 2:05 pm 
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If you are 3 meters away from her and she sees you would want to approach... you are attracted to her... but you hesitate... attraction goes down...

If go in weak after this you're doomed...

If instead you go in strong and you can recover attraction...

If you're just attractive but you're not interested in her... you can be attractive for whoever you want, but not her...

Women want to be involved, feel special and liked :)

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