Hi there guys how ya been?

Months have passed since I wrote a post on these forums, and I still seem to be at the same place I was months ago its not a happy place, this place has made me feel insecure, uncertain, depressed well yeah you get the idea..I am stuck somewhere Id not like to be in this dark and hollow place has made me become someone I hate, my feelings have made me hate..myself mostly (yeah yeah I know guy talking about feelings)


So I am making this post to shed some light for people beeing in the same situation stuck between girls, one whom you call your girlfriend and one who you call your friend and where you silence out the girl part in your mind because basicly thats what you want this girl to be for you a girl-friend.

To go back a few months and fill you in

A few months ago a new girl started working at the same place where I am currently working at, she was hot but as I had trained my mind appearance is not everything, right?
So there was nothing more to that then she was a Hb, we have all seen em..on daily basis.

But what if you suddenly started feeling an attraction which you quite could'nt understand for this Hb, not the regular I want to fuck you kind of attraction, you are really intressted in what makes her tick, as the player you are you used to getting your way with most girls.

But this one she's diffrent she gives you pieces from times to times just like doggy treats and you get addicted and she is holding the treat bag.

But this would not be a problem there is a reason why she's the one in charge and not you, like it should be(right?)
You have someone special allready someone that you do really love, but you cant stop thinking about this new girl she's all that you talk about when you cant say nice things about her to certain people you talk in a bad way about her...atleast your talking about her no matter in what way.


present time

Now a few months have passed you were hoping she would only be a memory but instead you long for a convo with her but now your sure she wants the same from you and she actually is in the same place as you somwhere where you look for any excuse to talk to eachother because thats how long its gone you the two of you now need something for a reason to even talk to eachother to hear eachothers voices everyone see's you as the ultimate missmatch but you guys know better your the ultimate match, you feel there is so much to say but your uncertainty drives you to silence, both of you feel you mae promises you wont be able to hold because in the end you feel what is certain yet your heart tells you the wrong girl is sharing your bed.

This is my present situation and there is no way out.
SF