Ive been reading PUA for many years and it has helped in some ways, but it has also given me this belief that a woman is a stationary car and you need to find the key to make it start. If the car doesnt start or starts and stop, the problem is your key (excuse the pun)

Do you ever think there are situations where you could be fully attractive in her the girls eyes and be doing everyting right, but she still walks away?

I went for a drink with a girl the other night and we were talking about flakes etc. I said 'no such thing as a commitment phobe, just a lack of interest' she said 'I met the right guy/s, but the timing wasnt right so I walked away'

Had me arguing within myself as to whether she was right or not and whether these guy/s could have done anything to stop her leaving.

So my question in general is - is it always down to the guy or not?

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Lmao fucking cars are you serious lol, these are human beings your talking about, and with that, can come complex thought processes, or not so complex.

Imagine a ''AFC'' now Imagine a ''Women AFC'' some women just aren't good at relationship dynamics, or even at life, Yes no matter what their looks (HBSuperSayan9000) are they can still suck at life. Let's face it most girls just aren't good PUA's.

Her definition of the ''right guy'' is going to be different from another girls ''right guy'' so this really is subjective. The whole timing thing in her life, can mean so many things, a excuse to cover up insecurities, not worthy of the right guy yet, or she just wanted to have fun more than being with the right guy, or lack of social skils, etc etc etc.

Do any of these really matter no, because just like you hear girls say all the time, I like that type of guy he's my type, and then you see them with the exact opposite type of guy.

If someone comes and sweeps the girl off her feet it doesn't matter the timing or alignment of the stars, things like this just happen.

Now this is where seduction/Pick-up comes in, these skills can give you a higher success rate with women, and for some of us any girl of their choosing. But you can't control the universe, and every situation, or interaction with these skills.

Can you do better most of, or some of the time, Yes! But is it always your fault, fuck no! This is where you're ''Game'' comes in. Understanding the difference between the two, and growing during the process.

Ever heard of "external factors"?

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My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Yeah sure, but PUA advice actually gives you that feeling that you should be in control and if a girl bows out, it's your fault. You may disagree as to whether it or doesnt, but that's how I feel from my years of reading PUA.
External factor? - I should be tactical enough to get round it etc. anyway, thats how it comes off hence why i ask.

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What PUA advice says that? Mystery Method back in 1990?

I disagree because your opinion is formed by years of reading PUA, my opinion is formed from years of real life experience.
What does that even mean, tactical enough?

Please explain to me how you can be "tactical enough to get around" her mother dying yesterday. Her best friend being in a car crash. Her having exams/important deadlines next week. Her working 12 hrs a day. Her being hugely insecure. You meeting her on the last 2 days of your vacation on the other side of the world.
Her having just broken up with the bf.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Well firstly let me point out that I'm playing devils' advocate here and not trying to be the expert. I have years of being with girls, but I would be the first to admit that I'm not getting the results I want so I'm obviously not right.
I am just putting it out there so see what people think.

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here to learn.. thats all.

I know you're playing devils advocate, that's why I'm trying to break it down for you.

It's a poisonous mindset trying to be in control of things you can't possibly be in control of.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

I think you are misinterpreting some PUA reads. Sure, whatever happens can be your fault if it comes down to you messing things up on a date or the way you pick her up and she flakes. Even the way you interact with her after sex and the behaviors you exhibit can have her running away.


Now, if she has a boyfriend that she didn't tell you about...you can't control that. She might be M.I.A and not as responsive because of this. Once again, like R.C. said, that is an external factor and no amount of PUA judo will get you around that. Same with other life factors, if something happened, it will affect her. She is a person. Learn not to take things personally.


And please for the love of god don't listen to a woman and right away interpret is as law. Pay attention to what she actually does with you but take everything she says with a grain of salt. Who knows why she walked away, who knows if these guys were actually exhibiting needy behaviors. WHO KNOWS. Just follow your behaviors and keep your life drama free.

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In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

It's all good bro, don't let the thoughts get to you. just rid yourself of this thinking, be more understanding and keep calibrating and pushing forward.