One of the big downsides I've found with this whole PU thing recently is having to LJBF girls that I actually do like but who don't meet my criteria for a girlfriend.

Usually if I meet a girl and we hook up and shes good fun I'll hang out with her for anything up to a couple of months before deciding whether or not I actually like her enough to turn it into a relationship. Quite often though I've been finding in this time a girl can get really attached to you and then when you LJBF her they get really cut up/turn mental.

Now being the nice sensitive person I am deep down (don’t let my secret out now!) I don’t really like hurting peoples feelings but sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do.

So any advice on how to LJBF a girl with minimum amount of grief (or personal injury to me) caused??!

p.s. bet you thought this thread was going to be about me getting the LJBF SPAM eh?!

SOI her, and be clear about it.

cheer slai, can you point me in the right direction of somewhere i can read more about theory behind SOI's?

Oh i think you know enough about SOIs .

Im assuming youve read the standard books, like Mysterys Venusian Arts, Wayne Elises How to be a Pickup Artist (changed the title to How to Meet and Attract Women, i think), and David DeAngelos Double Your Dating, in most of which SOI (statement of intent) is mentioned.

However, they generally mean it to be a statement of sexual interest, its merely a statement of your intentions with this person. Do you want to be a friend, a sexpartner, a chessmate, and so forth.

If you SOI her properly, and stick to it, shes probably less likely to assume attraction, or even become attracted.

Or.. at least thats a theory. Any thoughts :< ?

Havent read Venusian Arts yet (I am on it!) but familiar with DYD.

Basically from what you say, I think I understand the concept of SOI but I seem to keep getting framed as relationship material even though I tell them from the beginning I just want to hang out, have a luagh and not interested in one (a steady relationship) at this stage in my life. Obviously not making it clear enough or else i need to keep re-iterating it throughout all of our interactions!

An SOI is a term that came from Wayne Elise.
Or at least he's the one that stresses it the most.

The idea of an SOI is to make sure she knows you find her attractive.
Calling something about her sexy, for example.

It is NOT to make a statement of something otherwise.

See, what you're doing has the effect that David D. talks about.
He says to mention friend right off the bat, to steal the girl's frame.
When you do this, it makes her want you more...
you seem unattainable.

So a SOI is not going to help your case.

I've never really had your problem.
Like, I've had girls that I had no interest in be naturally attracted to me.
But it has never caused any real problems, unless I took advantage of it,
and then all of a sudden went cold turkey.

Otherwise, you're probably doing all that you can do.
I don't think there is a real good way to LJBF a woman.
Think about everytime it's happened to you (if it has).
It probably always sucked, no matter how it happened.

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You can learn and learn and learn all you want... but until you go out and use it, it doesn't mean a thing.