opening with negativeness



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PostPosted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 7:01 am 
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Last night I'm walking around downtown dallas gettin picked up by chicks and watching money randomly fall from the sky. I'm walking along and I see, well what else pua dudes! wooo... Me and Thad stand on their corner because we want to let them finish their set. After awile one of them walks over, we talk for a bit about our nights and how finesse is an amog haha.

Eventually the other dude walks over to us, greets us and we talk for a bit about oh idk we'll say tacos because that would have been cool. He then opens the girls within proximity to our group.

Him: hey, you guys look so bored!
Her: don't talk to us!

The guy tries to plow and he actually did a good job of plowing, but the girl wasn't having it. Why? because he had shot himself in the foot from the very beginning. We must remember that we are constantly projecting our state on others. He projected to them negativeness from the very beginning. He led himself to rejection. I have seen alot of guys do this, and I don't understand it. If you are going to open like this then why make it hard on yourself and start with something negative that you goin to have to do lots of work to get out of. Stuff like this is why I really prefer being warm and friendly over cool and distant. I'm sure the guy was cool, but his first impression made him look like a guy who had a shitty night and wanted to make one last ditch effort at gettin laid. I'm pretty sure he didn't have a shitty night I thought I saw him making out with a girl earlier in the night.

If you are going to assume things about people assume positive things. This will show that you are used to being around cool people. One of my favorite openers is:

Me: hey, you guys are where the parties at!
them: yeah!
Me: (I walk completely into their circle) now we.. are where the parties at!
them: haha
Me: (follow up with whatever)

The difference between this and what the guy did is that I assume they are fun. Why? Because I am used to being around fun people. My life is fun. I am not losing value doing this, but I am actually giving it. Complimenting the whole group is sincere because there's no way (in their minds at least) that you have an ulterior motive. You can't have sex with the whole group lol. Therefore assuming positive things about the group can be very powerful in opening situations that normally wouldn't. This idea can be taken alot further than openers, but I don't really have time to talk about that right now just give it some thought. Lata,

Anutharound

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