"Just Be Yourself" ... the road to Mastery.



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 2:49 pm 
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I'm a firm believer in the old cliche' "Just Be Yourself".... the problem is if being yourself at the moment is horribly dull and boring you're going to fall flat on your face. Then you have to think when you "be yourself" are you really being yourself or are you speaking behind a social mask that you were made to believe that's who you are?

Learning openers and being able to build attraction is GREAT.... it WORKS..... but if you don't OWN IT you're going to snap right back like a fucking rubber band into your old character. You can't build a fucking house without a foundation... but a lot of novices are tricked into believing that there's a magical opener that will change their entire lives. It doesn't exist.

The biggest killer in the PUA community is information over load and trying to perfect a system to where you're wrapping yourself so tight you have no room to maneuver what so ever. I've heard PUA coaches say you need to wait 3 days to text her, some say text her right away, some say call her..... meanwhile this is going through a newbie's head and he's saying "WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO!??!?!" I've heard some PUA coaches say get her number and get the fuck out of there... others have said to stick around and build even more rapport!!!!

If you have a solid foundation with your inner game does it really matter if you text or call her? Or what opener you use? A developed man saying "Hey!" is more effective than a person with a weak inner game using the most creative opener in the world. A developed man saying "Whatsup" is for more effective than a novice not even approaching her because he's short circuiting from information overload!

“Master the instrument, master the music, then forget all that shit and play.” (Charlie Parker quote)

^ this quote has served me greatly when I finally made the transition to become a higher version of myself. I've absorbed so much information from David Deangelo, Neil Strauss, Mystery and countless random videos on youtube which served me VERY WELL. But in order to get to the next level I "forgot" all the shit that I learned and just took MASSIVE IMPERFECT ACTION.


What does this mean? It doesn't mean I erased everything I ever knew... it's just that it came to a point where the important PUA material entered my subconscious mind and things became natural to me. But it couldn't have become natural to me if I never let go... I had to stop stressing myself out about saying everything perfect. Women aren't a ticking time bomb (unless they're on their period)... you don't have to sweat and make sure you cut the exact right wire.

“Too often our concept of learning is to absorb ideas from books, to do what others tell us to, and perhaps to do some controlled exercises. But this is an incomplete and fearful concept of learning – cut off from practical experience.”


If you stay focused on being "perfect" you'll never achieve that and you'll freeze up. There has to be a point where you adopt the techniques that fit your personality type and it becomes natural. Trying too hard to be perfect is what sabotages our success.... even the best coaches & gurus aren't perfect on every approach.

You can study the tape for hours and hours.... but nothing will prepare you for the shit you see in real-time. The best form of learning is taking action... even when you haven't learned everything under the sun.


“You experiment, you take some hard blows, and you see what works and doesn’t work in real time. You expose yourself and your work to public scrutiny. Your failures are embedded in your nervous system; you do not want to repeat them. Your successes are tied to immediate experience and teach you more. You come to respect the process in a deep way because you see and feel the progress you can make through practice and steady labor. Taken far enough, you gain a fingertip feel for what needs to be done because your knowledge is tied to something physical and visceral. And having such intuition is the ultimate point of mastery.”


Developing Inner Game and taking massive imperfect action is the ONLY way to mastery BECAUSE... your inner game is your foundation and taking massive action will get you real-time experience you can't possibly achieve with simply learning shiny techniques in front of your computer. The outer-game approach techniques are icing on the cake. Sure it's the sexiest information, it feels good to learn and it's easy to sit back on a computer and absorb it.... but without a foundation and getting your hands dirty you'll find yourself jacking off on your friday nights a year from now.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 3:29 pm 
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Quote:
I'm a firm believer in the old cliche' "Just Be Yourself".... the problem is if being yourself at the moment is horribly dull and boring you're going to fall flat on your face. Then you have to think when you "be yourself" are you really being yourself or are you speaking behind a social mask that you were made to believe that's who you are?
I think the cliche only works if you have an idea of the perfect you. How would you like to be. How would you like to dress. How would you like to behave. Then and only then can you be yourself. In other words: be your best self.
Quote:
The biggest killer in the PUA community is information over load and trying to perfect a system to where you're wrapping yourself so tight you have no room to maneuver what so ever.
That's the biggest problem. And also fan boys. It's not because you love Mystery that his method is the best for you. I love his style, but my method is entirely different.

For any newbie looking for advice I would tell him, "Go approach women, use your instinct and go freestyle. THEN read some books."
Quote:
I've heard some PUA coaches say get her number and get the fuck out of there...
Yeah, I've read that too and applied it... Worst advice ever... If you do that in night clubs, I guarantee you will get LOTS of flakey numbers.

This is what works best for me:
Conversation -> Set up date -> #Close
The #close should be in the end of the interaction when the two of you are about to go separate. This gives me a really high success rate for solid #close. Now when I think about it. I think it's almost 100%. But of course you have to keep in mind that I do this at the end of the interaction. When I don't think it's going to be solid I usually don't ask her number and go away early on in the interaction.
Quote:
A developed man saying "Hey!" is more effective than a person with a weak inner game using the most creative opener in the world. A developed man saying "Whatsup" is for more effective than a novice not even approaching her because he's short circuiting from information overload!
Indeed, I've used the simplest lines ever with the best results.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 4:58 pm 
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Yes. I'm also a big fan of this. I wasted an entire year of my life on soaking up material and it didn't get any better. I was still awkward, I still got flakey numbers on the very rare occasions that I went out instead of staying home to read or watch material and proceed with my mental masturbation.

True change can only be achieved by constantly putting yourself out. And EVERY method out there emphasizes this, and ironically, it is ignored all the time.

It does not matter what you like. Mystery, or Deangelo, or RSD or whatever... what matters is that you go out, and do it. Over and over again. Every blow out is a learning experience, and every small success is a motivation, to want more. This is what needs to be understood to get good at not only pick-up, but basically anything that you don't have a natural talent for(and even if you do have a natural talent, to be exceptionally good at that, you'll still need a lot of work)

Peace,

In$tinct.

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 02, 2014 4:09 pm 
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Indeed!

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http://www.manmindsetcoaching.com <-- Click Here


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 02, 2014 4:22 pm 
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Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:02 am
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Yes but i think all the material provides a good help to go out and do it with a structure. And it also helps a lot to analyze your mistakes. You can learn way quicker with the theoretical knowledge in your back, thats fore sure.

Cheers


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