This is just really a thought that has been growing in my head recently, both from my own experiences and reading stuff on here. It's not really advice or a tip, just something that I feel encapsulates a lot of the stuff on here.

Is it fair to say that a woman really just wants 'a thrill'? You need to make her feel excited.

All pick up teaches you really just comes down to helping you give a girl a thrill. You can create the thrill in different ways - being intriguing/edgy/different, being extremely confident/"alpha", being rich, being good looking, being funny, being interesting, having traveled widely, being exceptionally intelligent whatever.

But sometimes I just think that a lot of the stuff I read on here overcomplicates things and a lot of the people on here get so bogged down in little details or focus on specific things that they do more harm than good.

Now a lot of the stuff on this forum is brilliant and helps you to gain the confidence and skills to give a girl a thrill, and also how to give her a sexual thrill rather than just entertaining her in a 'friend zone' way.

But sometimes instead of trying to analyse every bit of the interaction, I feel we just need to take a step back and focus our minds purely on creating a sense of excitement. Go into an interaction wanting to entertain yourself and trying to create a sense of excitement, a thrill, for the girl, and you're going to be successful more often than not.

Don't get so wound up about the small details - if you just go in with that mindset a lot of the rest of the stuff just flows.

You hit the nail on the head.

However the truth you strike at is exactly the problem.

The girl I fell in love with (Alexa) was extremely intrigued by my lifestyle of living Epically, and texted me things such as: "Thanks for letting me share your bed tonight. We lived so Epically it made the daily routine seem gray and boring by comparison."

In the beginning she said things like: "OMG you made me cum three times during the first week. During my last relationship of two years I only came once." She compared my well-trained body to her fatigued ex-boyfriend who barely ate and always smoked pot and was overall very dull. She said: "Whenever it was good in bed with my ex-boyfriend, it was because I made it good." The first few nights I spent with her were very awesome, she did things like biting in my nipples as she climbed unto my chest, putting her nails in my behind as I drove my crotch into hers . . . And I said that it was good she was so passionate in bed, because I liked a girl that was really passionate. And she said that sometimes, people shouldn't be the opposite, like in terms of passion, although in general opposites attracted each other. However more and more, she stopped doing these very naughty things and the physical intimacy became more cliché. However I still threw everything into it, massaging every part of her spine, each bony knob, kissing her thin belly, massaging her every fiber, as foreplay to really taking her. Because she possessed the gorgeous body of a fairy with her wings clipped.

Then a month later she began saying fussy things like: "You know, you are so passionate, I don't think I could ever be like that." And: "You know exactly where you stand in life and what you want, I am still struggling to find my future."

I said: "I know exactly what you look for in a boyfriend. You look for a guy who has an interesting life of his own, a life that involves important goals other than you, as girlfriend. You look for a guy who has good hygiene, is excercized, takes care of his physical appearance. You look for a guy with a deep personality, since superficial chitchat causes you to zone out. And you look for a passionate, devoted lover in bed." She said: "Oh My God. You truly figured me out. How can you know me so well? I am deeply impressed."

Basically in the beginning they are attracted to your thrilling lifestyle, erudite intelligence, passionate nature. But then they become insecure about their feelings etc . . . So creating a thrill is good to lure a girl, but it doesn't cement, because in her heart she doesn't believe herself to be truly capable of living Epically. So you lose the girl and you suffer for being attached to her. She said things like: "Yeah, I can tell you are very passionate, and I have been questioning my feelings for you, and I can tell you are getting attached to me, and therefore I don't think it's good for you to be seeing me so often." (Mind you she said this after we already booked a romantic weekend in a hotel and the day after I called her on her birthday on which she was so happy to hear my voice over the phone.) Then when I pointed out her inconsistencies, she was like: "But you don't know me at all! You don't know anything about me!" (in a very self-appreciating tone)

Well first and foremost, my original post was largely intended for the picking up stage. I was primarily discussing creating attraction, not for long term relationships.

However, I still believe that 'the thrill' is important for long term relationships, but in a different way. If you're purely looking to pick up and have casual sex, then usually 'the thrill' is enough on its own. When you are looking to get into a serious relationship you need to be able to provide some stability as well - and the more serious you are getting, the more that stability has to translate into things such as financial security, similar life goals (ie; kids/career/marriage issues) and being able to provide for her.

But even when this is the case, you cannot stray too far away from 'the thrill'. Look at divorce rates in the US/UK nowadays. Why do so many people get divorced? Well, there will be lots of reasons (getting married too soon, people's goals changing as they get older etc. etc.)

However, one of the main reasons that any long term relationship/marriage will eventually breakdown is boredom. If you get into a routine where you both come home from work, watch the TV for a few hours, go to bed and have the same sex every time, do the same things, never do anything to excite her, then she'll get bored with you. Even if the sex is passionate, it doesn't mean it's 'thrilling' - to be thrilling it needs to change, it needs to be unexpected. However passionate it is, if it's the same each time, it will be boring after a while. Do it somewhere new, somewhere slightly risky, even if it's just in another room of your house, do it in different positions or with elements of role play in etc. etc. It needs to be new, it needs to keep being 'thrilling' and not just the same, even if that same is passionate.

And it's not just the sex - you need to take her to do new things, experience new sensations, new people. My Grandma and Grandad have been together since they were 20 (which is now 58 years together!). My Grandad books surprise cruises to different exotic locations. They try something new at least once a month (usually stuff that sounds boring to me, like classes on how to make fancy birthday cars, or arts and craft sessions etc. but hey, my Grandma likes that sort of stuff and they're a bit old to be trying anything too extreme nowadays!). Even after 58 years, they're doing things to keep the relationship fresh and thrilling. (Even if their definition of 'thrilling' would be quite different to mine.)

So even in a serious relationship, I don't think 'the thrill' is ever a 'problem'. You always need to give a girl a 'thrill'. It's just that the thrill in a serious relationship is different to the thrill in the early stages of attraction. In a serious relationship, you need to have other things, but you need to ensure that the thrill is still there, otherwise it'll get boring and she'll soon be going elsewhere anyway.