Brilliant
Chief, have you even been in a situation where you know you should have done something (gone for a close of any sort) and for some reason not done it (after becoming avarage at PU). If you have, and later kicked yourself for missing a brilliant oppotunity to do something you have done countless times before, how did u take it and how did u make sure it never happens again?
Madals

Ohhhh we've ALL been THERE. Well, except for the guys that have never even TRIED approaching before.

The most frustrating kick-myself-later thing that ever happened to me in the field was this one time I was gaming a hot blonde at a club called One Eyed Jacks last year. *I highly recommend that venue if you're ever in New Orleans, by the way.* She told me she was a lesbian but this was obviously not the case. I was trigger shy simply because I knew she wanted to remain congruent with her self-made lesbian identity, but I KNOW I could have easily kiss-closed... and, excuse me for sounding like Crypto, but I KNOW I could have pulled her and f-closed that night even though that isn't what happened. I escalated smoothly and had her buying temperature higher than anyone I've ever sarged before.

Little things like that happened here and there during those days. It was a pretty big sticking point for me. How did I get over it? A combination of two things:
1. Practicing Direct Game
When you use direct game, your interest is out there in the open, vulnerable to rejection. Since being trigger shy is basically rooted in a fear of rejection, you get used to giving the woman a very clear option to reject you. If you get used to that feeling of vulnerability, the trigger shyness disappears.
2. Habitually attempting to kiss-close without escalation
This will actually get you rejected a lot. I sure was, and I expected it. Once you do get rejected at your attempt to close dozens of times, though, you start to notice that it ain't so bad. Don't do this if you're getting genuine indicators of disinterest, though, or you could end up dealing with the law.

This is just one of the many problems people face when they stick with indirect methods like Mystery Method. They get used to hiding behind some kind of excuse and don't allow themselves to confront their INNER demons. Sure, they face some OUTER demons like actually going through the motions of a game they've never played before, but things like inner fears are never directly addressed.

If you haven't already done so, branch yourself out and try more methods.

I have never relied on a method, it was a one off. I used to have issues going for K-close before PU and i snapped outta it fast once i started to learn more. However last week i couldnt pull the trigger and have been trying to work out why ever since (i have closed since).
Thanks chief, i normally run quite direct game but i will open some pure direct sets this week to make sure i dont have it happen to me again.

Hi Chief,

im gunna go AFC on you all now lol

usually Im at parties that i know a fair amount of people, saturday im going to a house party where i will know the host, the host's sister, the host's best friend and my man who im rolling in with btw hes a total afc, no game completely shy.

how can i enter on a high note? do i turn up late? whats the best way to get into a group where i will know everyone and things like that?

basically give me a head start. what would the experts on cold approaches say?

Totti

Oh, these are easy as fuck. You basically want to turn every approach into a warm one. Be just a little fashionably late so that there's a fair amount of people there, but not too late because you want to be there when a lot of people are coming in.

As soon as you arrive, be noticed and be loud. Find someone you know and yell their name and greet them energetically while smiling.

Do NOT get drunk for the first half of the party or you might end up doing something to handicap yourself in your sarges.

Your best line to fall back on will be "So, how do you know (insert name of the host here)?" This demonstrates that you know the host and acts as a small qualifier to challenge the other person's value.

Kino the FUCK out of EVERYONE you know there and you'll establish a norm that it's OK to be touchy, which will give you access to kino the people you don't know more than usual.

As for your friend, don't let his AFCness drag you down. Throw a few sets of girls on him to get him a little social and move on. Let him talk to other people while you sarge.

Hey Chief,

I seem to come up against this issue a fair bit, but if I can crack it, I see a great opportunity. I'll give the latest example:

I just started going to this new place to get my hair done, and yesterday was my second time there. The place is FULL of hot girls that work there, but with my luck, while the girl that is cutting my hair is really nice, to be kind, she's not so hot... Anyhow, I sensed it last time, and this time it was very clear that she was interested in me. As I was leaving, I could sense that awkward pause and that look from her that tells me she's waiting for me to ask for her number or to ask her out. She seems cool, but unfortunately, I'm not physically attracted at all (fine, I'm shallow...).

So the question: what can a man do to get into this clique? All of these girls seemed really tight, so I'm thinking that getting in with this girl as a friend could open up the opportunity to game the others. Of course, if I ask for her number, I'm afraid that I'm sort of committing myself to be interested in her, and I'd just come off as an asshole if I turn around and ignore her while I hit on her friends. And the problem is that since I'm only coming there once a month or so, it's not like I can build up a friendship casually and work my way in from there.

Is there a way to swing this? It's actually happened in other circles before, and I'm usually just stuck...

Dude, hell yeah. Make friends with the unattractive girl. Get her number and hang out with her. Hit the friends-only triggers! Just don't be attractive to her! Don't do kino, stay away from any and all sexual frames, and act as if you were her best friend. Buy her shit. It's OK. Just nothing like chocolate, flowers, jewelry... that might hit some relationship triggers.

Once you've established yourself as the trustworthy friend, consider yourself in the social circle.

Don't be afraid to make any connections because passion can easily devolve into friendship. Act as if you're only interested in getting to know her first before you meet all her hot friends. Hell, if you guys just end up having sex, don't worry about it. Slap the friends-with-benefits label on that shit. Focus on friendship anyhow and the passion will die down if you don't openheartedly respond to her oxytocin-driven relationship-starting cues. If you're emotionally closed off, she'll be fine with not being romantically involved with you, but she should still be perfectly fine with being your friend.

Brilliant man, thanks! This answer is even more impressive considering it's something like 5:00 AM your time!

Ok sorry for the long post here is the story

My friend has a cousin, by his standards she is a HB9 min. My friend was frequently trying to get her to hang out with him with her girlfriends but she always found some reason to refuse. Yesterday i took his phone and called her by myself (we never spoke or seen each other before) and started talking to her as if i was him, we talked for about 2 min until she noticed that it was not him, i continued the conversation for like 5 more mins, i negged her, made her laugh unstoppably during the conversation and promised to call tomorrow from my number the next day. Next day i called her at about 2 pm, suggest to met, she objected that she does not even know me, she needs to study, etc, i made few jokes and she agreed to meet me in the evening (it took about 2 mins to get her to agree)

I call her at about 7.30 pm and ask if she is ready and she starts giving me this bullshit about studying again, i make fun of her for being inconsistent, the conversation last for about 5 mins, during which i make fun o her, she laughs and everything seems fluent, but i get the feeling she has too much power in this situation, as if i am the only one who is interested in the meeting and that 5 min of persuading her to meet me is really enough. I refute her suggestion to meet another day by telling that im very busy actually and that today is the only chance she will get with me in a "cocky/funny style", then i tell her to call me when she will make up her mind and hang the phone.

she messages me in an hour telling that she will be finished working on her thesis late and it will be too late to go somewhere, but we can still meet for a short period of time.

I replied with: i have met with my friends already, will call you some other day (i think it was DHV as i was not sitting there waiting for her to call,)

She replied ok then, we will meet each other next time

Now what should i do next? She really seemed interested in me but was was playing hard to get by making me convince her to meet with me.

I have few options

Call her in like 4-5 days and try to arrange the meeting again
Call her in like 2 days and just chat for a while to establish some comfort (what should i talk about with her?) and then call again in like 2 day and arrange a meeting
What would you do?

FUCK!!!

I typed out a really awesome and long response but my internet browser CRASHED and I lost all that text!!! I'll retype it later...

Alright Chief, Ive been gaming this HB9 for about 2 weeks. We hung out a couple weeks ago, had a great time and clicked very well. Didnt get a number close, nor did I ask for it, but she added me on facebook the following day. We've been communicating back and forth via facebook, in playful smart-assed banter. Until this:

ME: Since I'm not online that much, can I get your #? Everyone else I know is far too interesting and I need to be bored from time to time.

HER: Haha right...figure it out...


Now I'm POSITIVE that this is a shit test...I just don't know how to respond. Your advice is golden and I would really appreciate some.

Thanks

JB

_________________
"Who the f**k is Fanning?"

Plz Chief, can you retype that answer, I'm thinking i should call her today, max tomorrow

Dang Chief didn't realize you had became a super moderator on the forum. I haven't checked this place out for awhile. Yet I wanted to ask you a question and hopefully the answer will help the new guys out a bit. How would you best describe the feeling a freeze out should give a girl?

_________________
Girls like me why call yourself a Guru or MPUA either you got it or you don't.
www.realpuas.com

Sorry for taking so long to attend to this thread. I've been pretty busy.

Essentially, here are the steps I outlined for what I'd do exactly. It uses the concept of 2 steps forward, 1 step back, becoming a figure in her fantasies, and push/pull:
1. Clear your mind and get back to an abundance mentality so you aren't attached to the outcome.
2. Call her very soon and just flirt with her without giving any hint of wanting to meet her up.
3. Call her to just flirt with her at intermittent durations. Be unpredictable in when you call her, but I wouldn't call her more than once a day.
4. Every time you flirt with her, escalate the flirting so that you're turning her on more and more each time.
5. You're also going to use this time for comfort game. You'll be getting to know a lot more about each other. Use this opportunity to judge whether or not she's a good match for you. If you find out that she's not, soft next her.
6. Showing no interest in setting up a meet while you just flirt with her will implant the image of you into her fantasies. She'll eventually be begging to meet you, but remember to steer the conversation away from logistics and back to flirting in earlier stages.
7. Set up logistics once you are sure that she won't flake. Throw in more compliance tests to get her to invest in you such as "be sure to bring a digital camera when we meet" or "bring a snickers bar... it's going to be more a special reason" (and then just eat it lololol)

My first guess is that she has her phone number right on her facebook profile and she's telling you to "figure" that out.

Otherwise, I'm really not the person to ask for online game advice.